Etiquette for "seeing off" the funeral procession

[RatRatPig]

Our elderly neighbour has sadly died. The funeral details have been posted on the street FB group along with a note that the funeral procession will start at his house and anyone who can't make the funeral could "see him off" instead.

I'd like to, but I'm a bit nervous tbh and don't know what's expected of me. Should I walk down to their house, or just stand at my gate? (we're just along the road but I don't think the procession would come directly past us). Should I dress smartly? (It'll be freezing so I'll be wearing my big navy coat, but maybe smart shoes?). He lived alone and I don't know his family so not sure who I should give condolences to.

In case it makes a difference: this is east London and it will be a catholic funeral.

Thanks

I think you can just stand by your gate wearing whatever you want. You can bow your head as the hearse passes if you want.
Thats what we did when a neighbour died earlier this year

Sorry for your loss. I had similar, but we live in a quiet lane and the cars did drive past. We could see their house from ours, so when it looked like they were heading off, DH and I stood outside at the front. As the cars went past, we bowed our heads. TBH- we'd only just moved from central London, so weren't really sure what to do either.

A navy jacket is fine and I wouldn't even have fancy shoes on. Not saying I'd have slippers or wellies on though! Do you know others in the street you could ask, or all stand together on the day?

We've had neighbours come to stand by the gate as we came out of the house, they then watched until the cortege left. It was a cul de sac in both occasions and the cortege wasn't going past their house.

If you think the procession won’t actually pass by your home, go to somewhere along the route.
where your big coat.
and think fond thoughts of him as he passes by

It's always been traditional (although the tradition seems to have died off now, sadly!) that if the funeral cortège is leaving from the deceased's home, then neighbours would stand outside to see it off. Also, curtains would be closed as a mark of respect.

I personally still do all of this, but rarely see anyone else doing the same, which is sad in a way, but I get it. Communities are not what they used to be, things change and times move on.

OP, it's lovely that you are thinking of showing your respect to your neighbour, and simply standing by your gate, in whatever clothes you are wearing that day, will be enough to show that you care. As the cortège drives past you can bow your head if you wish, but you don't have to.

Quite possibly the Funeral Director will page in front of the first car (holding the coffin) until they have left the street...if you are going to bow your head, do it as the FD reaches your gate.

I'm always very moved at seeing this wonderful honouring of our loved ones as they make their final journey. Condolences 💐

Just stand by your gate, wearing something warm. Bow head if you want to. Your presence is the key thing, not dress or gestures.

People did this when my DF died (it was during the pandemic so we were very restricted to the number of people we could have at the funeral) and I was very moved by it. It was appreciated.
I honestly didn’t notice what they wore - just something warm as it’s so cold.

Just stand somewhere the hearse will pass, doesn't matter what you wear.
When my DH died the hearse was walked out 400m from the house and there were a lot of people standing outside houses and shops, it was very nice to see people being kind.

My grandad was well known in his area and loads of people stood at their gates as the cortège passed. It was very moving and nice to know that people cared.

Just stand by your gate and bow your head as the car passes. No need to wear anything special.

We lost my dad during covid and this was all the neighbours could do. It was very touching.