Advice on how to handle- dds housemates at uni want to out heating on overnight

[Thethingswedoforlove]

How can we convince them that it really isn’t cheaper to keep the house at a constant temperature?! They want to have it on at a ‘low’ temp of 17 degrees! It’s a huge house with 6 people and most students don’t even have it on during the day let alone at night. I’m at my wits end. How can we afford that bill? I told her that she should say that those that want it on overnight need to pay and she won’t pay a share of that but clearly that is a bit confrontational and doesn’t lend itself to harmonious living. How can we convince them?! It is utterly nuts. Some are saying things like my dad knows about heating bills and it is def cheaper etc.’

DD is in York, lives in a 200 year old draughty house and they have the heating on permanently in winter. Most student houses in York have bills already included in the rent though so no need to work out how much it's going to cost.

Don't you know that everyone in here knows all kinds of weird information about "everyone I know". It always makes me wonder if they have a questionnaire they give out or they don't know anyone outside their immediate family

Everyone I know includes, work mates, school parents, family, friends, neighbours , how could I possibly know even 1 fact about all of them 😂

I know this doesn't really help but if her housemates are at least being reasonable - keeping it on low, wearing jumpers and socks and not expecting to live in a tropical paradise then I think I'd just go with it. It's not worth damaging the relationships and having falling outs especially as she could end up living with much worse.

At uni I lived in a big house with 7 people. We were all keen on saving money and had the heating on a timer and everyone wore warm jumpers etc in winter.

We had one housemate who was the only one who never went home for the holidays. Once we left she used to take it off the timer, turn the thermostat up to 24 degrees(!) and walks round literally in t-shirts and shorts. In December.

She left it on 24 hours a day and even left it on while she went staying at her boyfriends house for 2 days and the house was empty. We found out when someone popped back to grab something and came into a very warm and empty house.

At one point the landlord came over and messaged us asking if there was an issue with the heating and if we knew the house was so warm.

The housemate refused to accept this was an issue and then the massive bills came she insisted we were all responsible for splitting it evenly. We had to pay but she left soon after as it caused massive arguments in the house.

There are so many stories of crazy housemate experiences and it could be much worse. Uni is a strange experience. You take all these teenagers who've never been away from home before. They're technically adults but they've no life experience. You put them all in a house together. They've all not much money and everyone thinks the way things were done in their house growing up is normal.It's a strange time and there's bound to be conflicts but I think it's good to choose battles where possible.

When I was at uni one girl had a first floor room with no external walls (well one, with the window). She wanted heating on from.6-11pm only. I was above her in the loft conversion so my ceiling and 2 walls weren't well insulated. Another lad was next to the living room where cold struck up from the ground and had external walls. Our rooms were freezing.

The students may need to talk a bit more about who feels the cold and why. If your DD has a warmer room than others she might genuinely not need it on and they might be able to understand one another better if they explain to each other.

In my case I also learned a new and impressive life skill - bleeding radiators. In the old cronky heating system we had, turns out the radiator in my room on the top was 2/3 air so never got hot. I'd never heard of such a thing age 19 but my parents told me about it and it made a big difference.

There might be stuff like that they can think through. But communication is going to be the key here.

Ours is set to 16 overnight and I don’t think it actually runs very much, only when the weather is really cold. Wouldn’t want it any colder than that for the dog anyway.

Actually ultimately the heating is the choice of those paying the bills.

Not that her parents don’t let her - that she/they cannot afford it. And no, if someone can’t afford something the others want to do, they can’t require that person to take part. If they want to crank up the heating at night then they need to pay for it. And I would absolutely turn it off when they were asleep if they refused to take account of my financial needs - why the fuck should I/my parents scrimp and save so that some entitled brats can sleep in 21 degree temperatures?

17, not 21.

I'm not sure how popular that attitude would be in a shared student housing situation, or how that would work out for you, but you could give it a go I suppose. There are some people that don't tend to buddy up for shared housing on year two and they're the ones best in control of their own milk, loo roll and thermostat.

How can we convince them..

Surely this is something for the adult students to be negotiating for themselves?

Sure. Yes. Point noted.

Some helpful advice here thank you. I hope your DD finds an amicable solution OP but being cold is miserable and very bad for health.

I know… didn’t feel too bad in the end as they insisted I pay the same rent as them despite my room being a quarter of the size of theirs.

I had a period of living with someone who was strict about heating and it was the most miserable way to live. If you really feel the cold you just want to cry just getting out of bed in the winter. Sitting on the toilet in the night is shockingly cold. You wear all your clothes at the same time and then can’t get any laundry dry. It’s shit.

people have been super helpful and I appreciate it. Thank you. And to be clear I have never advocated having the heating off during the day.

Have you seen the Loop app? It links to a smart meter and gives day by day/half hour energy use & cost - see pic. This would also help them keep track of where they are against the cap.

Our heating is set to 14 overnight, and clearly came on in the early hours, costing us 52p between 4:30am and 5am. If it was set to 17 it would be on all night!

We never have our heating on overnight either, it comes on about 6am so that it's not freezing when we get up, that's all. If I'm working late at night on an emergency I put it on then, and turn it back to timed when I'm finished.

I hadn’t heard of this. Thank you

Not when the parents are paying their bills it isn't.

There's nothing she can do for extra money? Why are you paying her bills, doesn't she have a loan?

If it’s any help OP my dd graduated last year. 2nd year house they barely had the heating on, except a couple of them who had fan heaters in their rooms, they clearly felt cold. 3rd year house they kept the heating on more (no idea if it was on overnight). They went over the bills cap in 2nd year but not 3rd. Year 3 household are also still friends!

Why are the parents paying their bills ... They need to get jobs

Why are students who don't want to be cold in below zero temperatures being called "idiots" and "entitled brats"?

Dd does have a job in the holidays. We do provide her with financial support as well as is very normal for many many students as the loan amounts are simply not sufficient.

This is super useful. Thank you

Mumsnet is full of people who love to play the martyr to the cold and brag about it. I wouldn’t want to live in a cold house.

As others have noted it depends on the type of house, windows, heating system. Some of our windows are double glazed and some aren’t, the single glazed rooms are always much colder. We have Hive heating so only heat the rooms we are in. Our bedroom is set to 17.5° overnight but that’s with the thick curtains closed which keeps the heat in. Unless the room becomes colder than this the radiator isn’t on tho. Probably not an option in a student house.

It’s unreasonable to expect people to be cold but there comes a point where people are just wasteful. I suppose it depends on where on that spectrum people fall.

As others have said maybe a smart meter that show energy usage would make people wise up?