Partner working away

[Mowglimonkey]

My DH is working away next week. In all the time we've been together (7 years) we've probably spent 4/5 days apart.

I feel so anxious about the thought of him being away for the whole week. The last time he had to work away he was only gone 2 nights and I was so bloody anxious. In fact I was that anxious I could barely eat!

I've lived alone before, I was on my own for about two years before we lived together. When he's away I won't be alone our two teens will be here, I just know I'll work myself up about this while he's away.

How do I stop myself getting so worked up about it? I've planned a meal out one evening, invited a friend over another evening. I'll be at work in the daytime anyway.

I know there are bonuses to this. I can watch what I want on TV. The house will be much tidier and I'll have less of his mess to tidy up!

If your DH works away how do you cope with it?

THIS
And remember there are plenty people who go it alone (sometimes by choice/sometimes not)

I know. I have been in both of those situations.

I wish I'd spotted my sudden anxiety about this as peri symptoms when I had it.

DH is off for 2 weeks on Sunday and works away often. I settle into my own routine, eat what I want, watch what I want and potter around admiring how much tidier the house is!

You raised two children. There's nothing you cannot handle.

That’s great! Very well done.

You’ve probably realised now that it’s not about your DH working away, it’s about your anxiety. Most people wouldn’t get so anxious about their partner working away. Some level of discomfort yes, but not so much.

Its natural with anxiety to see someone close to you as being an anchor, but it would be worth talking through with your mental health support just how dependent you have become on your DH.

It's definitely about my anxiety. Most of the time it's low level and not a problem. I have definitely realised i need to address some issues and have made an appointment with a GP.

Don't worry I get anxious when DH goes away too.. I do have anxiety myself, and I don't know what it is really, it's just nice to have someone else in the house other than DS. Although I manage perfectly fine when he isn't here, I'm definitely much more relaxed when he is home x

Is there anything you really want to do that he hates? Food, TV or cinema? I love being alone for a few days. I rediscover myself! Maybe have some quality time with your teens? Pizza, bowling or the cinema?

I totally get you. I've got anxious just reading this and all your husbands/wives away

I understand it's totally irrational, I've had two lots of therapy to try and overcome it.
And I lived alone with my children for six years so where this came from I do not know! It just started, dh had been away before and suddenly I got a crippling anxiety about it.
I don't have anxiety in any other part of my life, manage a successful career and have two adult daughters who are independent and I don't even think about it when they are away! I hate it I really do

We've made plans to eat out a couple of evenings.

I'm sorry to hear this but also glad that I'm not alone or some kind of moron for feeling how I do.