Dd 17 very gentle soul but cries easily

[IvyOrangesCandles]

Dd is a sweet gentle beautiful soul, but she gets upset very easily. What can I do to help build her resilience?

Can you give some examples of her crying easily?

Has she always been this way or is it something new/newish?

Is she neurodivergent?

Does she have anxiety or depression or other mental health difficulties?

Is it impacting her life in a negative way?

@TheyCantBurnUsAll re nd I'm not sure.

She's super hard working and bright.
She can stick up for herself and others.

Sometimes I just find she folds eg I was asking her dad for something and he didn't hear so I had to raise my voice and she started to cry saying I was shouting

She has extremely sensitive ears and has misophonia

She doesn't share anything either, eg she doesn't really share what goes on with her friends and I do really worry about her keeping in touch and knowing about her life when she goes to uni..

She doesn't really initiate conversation or mum listen to this or mum this happened today.

Or mum can you help me with this etc.

She has said in the past her fiends details are private and their business.

When she goes to uni I do fear she won't keep in touch in school trips she won't take pics or say we went here today or give me details I've had to rely on friends mum to share.

Her general communication is poor.

• if she approaches me to say something it's always to ask can I go there or see so and so. It's never to chat

From one sensitive soul who’s recently diagnosed with- she’s possibly neurodivergent

She sounds like my brother who is 37 and just been diagnosed with autism. He can’t initiate conversations and can get upset easily.

Everyone thought he was ignorant but he’s actually a really nice guy and chatty - nice once you start a conversation up ( well most of the time)

@Odinsgoodeye ignorant in what way?

She sounds exactly like my DD.

My DD lacked confidence as a teenager and cried a lot of tears of frustration, worry, angst, anything, really. She barely muttered more than one syllable and even WhatsApp messages were one word replies. Is your DD more mature than her peers on an intellectual level but less emotionally mature at the same time?

She is now 26 and she won’t stop talking. She also shouts at people for a living, ie bossing about film / TV crews who aren’t the most subtle of people. Talk about a 180.

Your DD may be ND but she also might be going through the teenage pull away stage where she wants to develop her own personality and boundaries away from her parents and home life. Be patient and she’ll find her way.

@RealHousewifeOfSlough thanks.

I remember being very shy at that age also and I'm still very shy in some situations and very confident in others.

She can defend herself and stick up for herself she's not crying over everything at all.
She rarely does but sometimes it catches me unaware when she does.
I grew up in a house of 2 parents at constant war properly shouting and screaming etc.
So in a very normal happy context slightly raising my voice to get dh attention seems very easily triggered to me.

Your daughter sounds lovely OP. Being sensitive could turn out to be her best quality. We need more people who feel deeply. She'll evolve as time goes on, just be there for her and she'll come back to you.

Have you considered getting her some earphones for her sensitive hearing?

My DD uses loop ear buds for school and when going to busy places like the shopping centre, or a show that might be loud.

How did she cope at school? Secondaries are loud and teachers shout.

@gingeristhenewblack43 I wonder if her headphone is making it worse she got new headphone recently and they really cut out noise maybe they are making her even more sensitive?

She gets stressed saying if she doesn't like anything it's strange to me. She struggles to express herself normally.

@MsWillis this is my huge worry though she doesn't really let us into her life at all.

She doesn't share I have to ask.