Did he cheat or is it in my head

[Lightcupoftea]

Hi new to hear looking for honest opinion please found out partner took a whole trip away holiday didn't tell me until I saw it on his phone accidentally he went away 2 months ago for few days saw him partying with women and at his hotel room also he said it's Notting like that it's all in my head that I wouldn't cheat and put blame on me feel numb just carrying on as normal but I'm not allowed to feel anything as if I say anything I'm bad guy did he cheat or is it in my head

The fact that the trust has gone means the relationship is doomed, regardless of whether he cheater or not.
But yes, I think he probably did cheat.

It does sound possible. Why not tell you he was going away unless he had something to conceal.

How long have you been together?

He's no partner if he can't tell you up front that he's going away - regardless of what he did while he was there. Why wasn't he open about his plans? Do you live together?

Whether he’s cheated or not, you’ll never know and you’ll always have trust issues. It’s not worth continuing.

There is nothing left by this stage so LTB.

Who were these women he was partying with and were at his hotel room? Why would you want to be with someone who goes off on holiday without telling you and has videos/pictures of him with other women even if he hasn't cheated? Just end it and find someone much, much better.

We being together 6 years live together. And have a child together. He lies alot . But blames me so when I find out he lies don't confront him as I no it will be turned on me . So just ignore it continue as normal. Just being by normal. I no even if he has he lied about going wasn't honest said he was going to see his mum so didn't question it then to find out he went away . He went to Amsterdam on trip . But didn't tell me . But because I confronted him on videos and then trip and lying about where he was . I don't no random women. He didn't say I don't no them . But he had videos Notting in it like that but they was together socially but he said Notting happened like that but if he had to lie then don't look good .

You need to end it, you deserve better. It's not about what he did on this trip, it's who he is and how he disrespects you.

when I find out he lies don't confront him as I no it will be turned on me

Is that the model of what a relationship looks like that you are happy for DC to think is ‘normal’? Would you be happy for them to go on to be in a similar relationship?

He is a liar OP. You will never be able to trust him.
And yes, saying he is going to his Mums but instead going to Amsterdam and having random women in his hotel room , he has almost certainly cheated on you. And deliberately done this to cheat on you
Really you would be so much better without this man who us treating you with total disrespect. Treating you like a fool actually.
You deserve so much better OP.

No course not .. would never want that . What mother would . But I try to act normal and ignore my feelings turn them off play a role of being perfect happy family for my child . I put how I feel to the side . As my feelings and opinion don't Mather . As I put everyone first my self last . As don't want to upset anyone . As if I confront situation I just get it turned on me and how wrong I am for having opinion or feeling . A while ago they was messagings from a women on his phone flirty messages confronted him he said it's all in my head . And I'm seeling this . So I no how it goes when I do .

So. You know he cheats. No doubt he comes home to have unprotected sex with you and put your life at risk. He disrespects you and doesn't care about your feelings.

Time to move on. You are there mentally, you just need your body to follow.

Don't talk to him about it - he won't change but he will give you whatever bullshit he thinks will make you do whatever it is he wants. Don't give him power over you.

Secretly work out where you are going to live and how you are going to manage financially. Get everything in place. Then talk to him, if you want to. By then, though, you won't want him in your life.

Good luck.

You are his bang maid. He thinks you are a woman of no importance.

It’s time to make your own life.

Don’t expect him to behave as you would like. Don’t think he will behave well. And don’t bother wondering why. You will never know or understand. You are a single parent.

So your partner lies and cheats. Only you can decide what happens now. You either stay and accept or work towards a split.

You say you live together so where did you think he was for those few days while he was away?

At his mum's house he said he going to see her spend time with her for few days so that's where I thought he was untill I found out the truth

Move on OP. Don't worry about proof or proving yourself right.

It's not normal partner behaviour to go on a trip abroad without mentioning it or to lie about whereabouts. Or to have women in your hotel room generally speaking.

This isn't what you deserve. Don't waste your life on arguing about it with him and his mangled logic.

He wants you keeping home fires burning whilst he does what he wants and is willing to expend a lot of energy and cross a lot of moral boundaries such a lying to maintain that from what you say. If you're confident enough with what you feel and what you've seen then just leave. As for 'it didn't happen', 'you're mad' etc, well he would say that, wouldn't he?
. concentrate on what you want from life and a relationship.