Question about "madam"

[SwordToFlamethrower]

My MIL was just on the phone with DH and she went on loudspeaker to speak to DD.

DH said that DD said "thank you" for the first time today (25 months old) completely unprompted. And MIL said "aren't you becoming a little madam!"

I'm confused. I'm from Yorkshire and being called "a little madam" was a bit of a sexist thing that meant that you were being cocky and argumentative, outspoken girl.

Has the phrase evolved or was it a regional thing as MIL lives in London.

I’m from Somerset and only ever heard it as an insult.

Londoner born and bred here and I would definitely take it as an insult if someone called me a little madam.

Yeah it’s an insult in my book. A stroppy, demanding, argumentative girl.
See Verucca Salt in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

I only know of "little madam" being an insult, but I reckon your MIL was just getting words/ phrases mixed up and meant your dd was becoming a polite young lady or something similar.

It's better than trollop which is what my nan used to call me. I dare say she meant she's growing up but it's a crappy way to put it

I've only ever heard "little madam" used in a negative way but it looks like your MIL was trying to say your DD was being a nice young lady (ie polite etc)

Yeah, I think she meant it nicely. I doubt very much your daughter's own Grandma was trying to put her down for saying thank you for the first time! It makes far more sense that she had a malaprop moment.

Surely you know mil well enough to tell if she was just surprised and meant well or not. You don't need the internet to tell you

And as the Queen of the Malapropism, I kick myself internally every single time when I realize what I've just said! It's the menopause....

It's not actually the first time she's called her a little madam, it's just that now she's done it again, I'm reminded of it and now thinking "what the hell!"

Surely her general demeanour is more important than 2 words she said

100% she didn't mean anything other than 'aren't you a little grown up lady now!' Don't worry about it @SwordToFlamethrower or give it another thought.

My great uncle once called my cousin saucy when he just meant cheeky and cute!

#AWKWARD! 😬

Surely your Mil was just saying how grown
Up your DD is getting. Yes it usually is an insult, but in this case give her the benefit of the doubt.

So now you're saying it's not the first time she has said it.

FGS. 🙄

.

I am so surprised at most of the answers, she didn't call her 'little madam', she called her 'little' granddaughter a 'polite lady' (=madam). 😂

What's your problem??

I'd maybe speak to her about this and ask her what she thinks 'little madam' means. I bet she has totally misunderstood the meaning of it. It's 💯% an insult but I bet anything your MIL doesn't know this. My mum once called my daughter 'smeghead' (a word she'd heard elsewhere 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️) and when I recoiled in utter shock, and asked her what she thought this meant, she said (totally innocently 🤷‍♀️) that it meant 'bed head' (as in 'tousled hair)  I did explain what it actually meant and she was mortified 😬

This! My granny says it and used to say it to my daughter. If the tones nice, I means this. If it's not then she's not happy with your DD 🤣

But my mum only said it to me when she was pissed off. I don't know if it's generational or location.

That's a really horrible thing to say - yes it's an insult.

I think you should ask her straight out what she actually means by the term. Ask her if she is really saying your dd is a cheeky, wilful, spoilt brat, or is she mixing the insult up with some other phrase?

I do think if she has used the term more than once you need to talk to her about it and make it clear it's not acceptable to call your dd that.

It's an insult round my way

Give her the benefit of doubt, as she probably means young lady. I think I'd use the mumsnet question of did you mean to be so rude? Ask mil "did you mean 'little madam' as that means xxxx or did you mean young lady, as saying thank you is polite and something a polite young lady would say and not a little madam. I'd hate for you ,mil, to describe DD as a little madam and for other people to question you when it's obviously an error. It might be embarrassing for you"

Old crone