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I need some suggestions for how to cope with people who don't listen or otherwise I'm going to spend Xmas enraged.

4 replies

Neolara · 21/12/2024 22:56

Over the next few days I'm going to be spending time with people who thinks the purpose of conversation is to be interesting, as opposed to interested.

One talks at me. Another asks me occasionally questions but doesn't appear very interested in what I say and conversations are mostly her just telling stories.

I think I'm ok at conversatations and can talk pretty easily to most people. I know I can make these people thoroughly enjoy the conversation by showing interest and being curious. But frankly, being talked "at" instead of "with" gives me the absolute rage and at this point in my life I just am not prepared to put up with it any more.

My current strategy is remove myself from the conversation and go hide in a room by myself. I think this is an excellent strategy but dh has just told me is really obvious I'm escaping. Unfortunately, these people are in laws. so I sort of have to find a way to not seem rude.

So any suggestions to get me through the next week?

OP posts:
LadyChilli · 21/12/2024 22:57

No but I'm watching with interest.

EducatingArti · 21/12/2024 23:00

Play bingo? Make a list before hand of what you think the most likely things are that they will say or do. Give yourself a point every time that one of them happens And as everyone knows...points mean prizes!

WinterCrow · 21/12/2024 23:04

I've just taken a pregabalin and I'm not even seeing mine. But dear lord, the memories of Christmases past ... they haunt me in my dreams.

WilfredsPies · 21/12/2024 23:15

I daydream. DH’s friend is lovely, a really nice man, but so incredibly boring and never asks questions about me or what I think. I have no interest in hearing what his nephew (who I have never met) thinks of the playground equipment within a five mile radius of his home. So I nod a lot and look for facial cues to know when to smile or shake my head and say that something is shocking, and I’m actually thinking about things I need to do for my hobby, or what sandwich I really want to eat. He seems none the wiser (he hasn’t stopped) and has told DH I’m a good listener. He’s happy. I’m happy (I love a bit of daydreaming) and DH is happy because I’ve been kind to his friend.

Or you could fake a UTI? Hiding in the loo is a bit more subtle than going into a different room, and you can escape at really short notice. Keep your phone in your pocket and you’re sorted.

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