How to better deal with this?

[NigelHarmansNewWife]

Yesterday I was helping run a fundraising event and we were serving ticket holders drinks and snacks on arrival. One of the volunteer helpers and I just didn't see eye to eye and after thanking everyone who helped she has responded with what is definitely a barbed comment reflecting how she felt about me! She was happy to help but was giving away free drinks to her mates, helping herself and definitely didn't like me asking her not to do that as we need to be sure we had enough for all ticket holders. She's someone I find I have nothing in common with which I'm sure doesn't help.

I'm reflecting on things and wondering if this something I can change or should I just accept we don't gel and her volunteering was so she could help herself?

Need more context. Are you colleagues? How is your relationship normally?

I'm not sure we can tell if there's something you can change from this post

We do the same hobby and were both helping out at a annual event we put on for the public. The people she was giving free drinks to were members of the hobby group who had already been asked to wait until the interval to get refreshments so we could get all the ticket holders served. The rest of the hobby group all needed to go and get ready anyway.

I feel there was a clash of personalities and we both pissed each other off. Just trying to work out how to better navigate this is future. For background I also know there was a past event where she helped out and the helpers all got pissed, it took ages to get everyone served and they forgot to charge some people!

We get on superficially. Never going to be mates as we've nothing apart from the hobby in common. Just very different personalities.

All sounds a bit dramatic AmDram by any chance?

You don't like each other end of if you don't ike what she's doing probably better raise it higher up, not with her.

I'd mind my own business if it were me.
If there were no drinks left for ticket holders then I'd send any one with any queries her direction.

It's neither dramatic nor am dram either. I've just reflected on things and was wondering if anyone had any advice on how better to deal with this in future. She clearly didn't want to do as she was asked "that's me, I'm a bit naughty" as she poured herself a drink and because I didn't laugh along didn't like it.

I think you’re overthinking this. Just don’t do any tasks alongside them at future events? She wanted to bend the rules, you didn’t go along with it, she reacted to that. It’s a bit teenager-like when the “cool girl” is trying to pressurise others into things. I would just avoid doing anything closely with them from now on.

@Rainbowshine I think you are right. It's been a long, long time since I've encountered someone behaving like that and someone who clearly disliked me telling them what we wanted them to do. You live and learn.

@NigelHarmansNewWife she knows she was in the wrong and resents that you didn’t help cover it up by joining in by helping yourself. Either don’t join in with running stuff if she is helping, or make it known that she’s not behaving appropriately at public events, if it is possible to do so without causing more drama/seeming spiteful.

I have nno suggestions about how to deal with this person, though I sympathise.

I have come on here to suggest that this issue about the drinks should be discussed and sorted at a wider level before next year?

Unless you're in charge, I would ignore it. If it goes wrong then you can give your feedback to the person running things.

I was one of the small team actually running the event, we had already discussed and decided on the approach re: members wanting drinks, etc. ahead of the event.