So I am very much it’s the couples wedding so it’s their rules person.
so a family have all had an invite to a wedding next year.
the whole wedding and the evening do is all at one venue.
Grandparent, parent to one of the couple and siblings of the parent so uncle’s and aunt’s of the person getting married.
the wedding is being held at least 2-4 hours away from them depending upon where they are so everyone is travelling and going to stay in a hotel for the night before and the night of the wedding.
when the invitations arrived the aunts and uncles invitations were missing menus thinking it was a mix up or an error they asked the others what the menu was so as not to bother the couple who are obviously busy arranging a wedding. The others also thought that somehow some of the invitations had got messed up.
eventually one of them contacted the bride and groom to rsvp give their food choices etc to to be told
no it wasn’t a mistake we hope you understand but it’s expensive and there are limits to how many can be in the room so we couldn’t invite everyone for the meal.
so that means these family members have been invited for the wedding then not invited to the meal but are invited to the remaining part of the wedding from the end of the meal onwards. The other family members have been invited for the meal so they will be there all day.
so that means these few are to come for the ceremony then go away and kill some time somewhere (maybe try to find somewhere to eat) then go back to the venue for the rest of the wedding.
they have gone back and looked at the invitations now they know and except for the missing menu it looks exactly the same as the family members who have been invited for the whole thing so it’s not very clear that they had a gap in the middle that they haven’t been invited to.
is this a thing now?
they have been perfectly polite about it and won’t obviously bring it up but are thinking it is a little weird.
They have decided that they will go and try to find somewhere to eat as otherwise they will not have eaten since breakfast due to the ceremony timings and the wedding could possibly go on until quite late on. If it had been close to home they could’ve have nipped home but obviously as said above they have had to travel.
when they they were telling me I have never heard of this before but then I don’t have a lot of experience with weddings and definitely not recently. I do find it a bit off to be honest also I also understand that weddings are expensive.
what do others think?
is it weird or is it just how weddings are done now?
like I said I’m very much couples day their rules but I do feel like it might have been better or rather easier to have just been transparent and invite them to the ceremony or the evening do as this gapin the middle just makes it awkward day for them.
just to be clear this is not a bash the couple thread. Even if I and they don’t understand it or think it’s a bit weird they are just going with the rules and hold no animosity.