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Original poster

Is it okay to go braless when flatsharing with strangers

28 replies

qq123 · 17/12/2024 12:53

I’m small chested anyway but always wear a bra when in public mostly to cover nips. Usually as soon as I get home I take it off as it’s far more comfortable and I’m prone to back pain even with bralettes

I’m moving into a new flatshare soon though and sharing with men (previously shared with women so felt fine going braless).

Is it awkward if I go braless, I’d dress conservatively anyway but don’t want to make them uncomfortable as you can sometimes still see outline even in layers

OP posts:
TenderChicken · 17/12/2024 12:55

Of course it's fine.

WilliamIII · 17/12/2024 12:57

It's years since I've flat-shared, but I never felt awkard being braless around male flatmates as long as I had a top on! I'd have breakfast in my pjs at the weekend and I wouldn't have a bra on then.

HPandthelastwish · 17/12/2024 12:59

I wouldn't go braless with just a t-shirt on or something thin as I wouldn't feel comfortable with that and neither would I particularly want a male flatmate just walking around in a pair of thin boxers although ifcourse there is nothing actually wrong with that either. I would if I had a hoody or other thick top on though as presumably you will at least at the start of your to time there as it's winter. Once the summer comes you'll know how comfortable everyone is with it.

RedToothBrush · 17/12/2024 13:00

If you are living with people I'd expect you to go braless - I wouldn't expect you to only wear PJ's in your bedroom.

Are you going to wear a bra in bed or get up and put one on if going to the toilet?

Hell I might even expect you to walk between the bathroom and your room in just a towel and not think anything of it.

I do wonder how other people think some days.

Imperrysmum · 17/12/2024 13:02

think what level of visible penis outline youd be happy with on a man and go from there

Chocaholic1216 · 17/12/2024 13:02

I think it’s fine as long as you’re not wearing thin tops as they can sometimes be a bit see through. I’m the same and not big chested so often go braless under my tops around other people. I only wear a bra if the top is a bit revealing as don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable

GroovyChick87 · 17/12/2024 13:11

On here you'll get the majority telling you it's fine and that if the men aren't comfortable that's their issue, but in reality if you have prominent nipples and a thin top, men are going to look whether you like it or not.

BobbyBiscuits · 17/12/2024 13:15

I thought you meant topless for a mo. Lol.
I never wear a bra now. It's uncomfortable and caused me to have costochondritis for a month three times a year!
Bras are there for support, not to stop men for staring at your nipples! If your flatmates of either sex are pervs then I don't think your lack of brassiere will make much difference.

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 17/12/2024 13:17

I flatshared with women when I was younger, and never cared, and to be honest, after about week 3 wouldn't have even noticed. When you live with someone you're not in a relationship with, eventually you just end up seeing them as sexless, like you do with family.

It doesn't take long to see them at their grottiest, with a stinking hangover or a hideous cold, or find out their most annoying habits, theres a good chance it'll kill all attraction for them.

vincettenoir · 17/12/2024 13:21

It’s just down to your personal choice.

MorrisZapp · 17/12/2024 13:26

Hmmmmmmmm

OhBling · 17/12/2024 13:31

I think this is a you concern not a them concern. Ie you wear a bra to make YOU feel comfortable and don't wear a bra when you don't feel comfortable. What you flat mates think, male or female, is completely irrelevant (barring, obviously, blatant nudity).

I am not comfortable being braless around men I am not direvtly related to unless I'm wearing a big jumper or something, so I wouldn't. But that's about me. If another woman is perfectly comfortable being braless in a t-shirt at home, then what the men think is 100% irrelevant.

momofonexo · 17/12/2024 13:43

Imperrysmum · 17/12/2024 13:02

think what level of visible penis outline youd be happy with on a man and go from there

How is that even comparable? 😂 she's not showing her vagina.

blackberryhill · 17/12/2024 13:44

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 17/12/2024 13:17

I flatshared with women when I was younger, and never cared, and to be honest, after about week 3 wouldn't have even noticed. When you live with someone you're not in a relationship with, eventually you just end up seeing them as sexless, like you do with family.

It doesn't take long to see them at their grottiest, with a stinking hangover or a hideous cold, or find out their most annoying habits, theres a good chance it'll kill all attraction for them.

Edited

I think the family comparison is a reasonably apt one. I've lived in flatshares with men in the past, some of them strangers. I took a similar approach to the one I'd have taken around my dad or my brother if I were living with them - so in my case, happy to walk around with no bra on, provided I was wearing something fairly shapeless and covered up (PJs, big jumper, etc), if I were in a vest or similar I'd throw a cardigan over the top before wandering around. Robe on if heading from the shower back to my room.

In any event, I was rarely thinking about what would make them comfortable, only about what would make me comfortable (in all senses of the word!)

Einaldilastcup · 17/12/2024 13:46

No I wouldn’t it’s distracting. I’m sure you could put a vest on or a sports top?

I wouldn’t want to see a floppy cock out line either.

how old are you?

eqpi4t2hbsnktd · 17/12/2024 13:50

Just chuck are cardy on..

and no white vests! I defo wore a white vest with no bra in the 90's to be sexy and classy....

jotex · 17/12/2024 14:11

In theory yes, but be careful that they don’t take it as some kind of sign that you’re coming on to them. Men can be weird!

Iliketulips · 17/12/2024 14:18

If you feel comfortable with the men and are comfortable doing that yourself then it's fine. At some point, they'll catch you early morning coming out of the bathroom with your pjs/whatever on and I'm sure you won't be wearing a bra then.

coxesorangepippin · 17/12/2024 14:19

No. Never.

SallyWD · 17/12/2024 14:22

Well you should be able to go braless but the reality is men will notice (and maybe get turned on) if you have prominent nipples. It's just the way it is. If you're fine with that then go ahead. I personally wouldn't be comfortable but I'm probably more repressed than some people.

SnoopySantaPaws · 17/12/2024 14:26

eqpi4t2hbsnktd · 17/12/2024 13:50

Just chuck are cardy on..

and no white vests! I defo wore a white vest with no bra in the 90's to be sexy and classy....

Classy 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

GasPanic · 17/12/2024 14:28

Having lived in many houseshares, I would have thought that within a pretty short space of time living there you would have got the vibe of the place and figured out whether this is something that both you and the rest of the people around you are comfortable with.

You could of course make it all about you and do what you want from the off. However, don't be surprised if everyone else around then decides to act in the same way.

My experience of house shares is that it is best to tread as lightly as possible at first, get to know people, the politics and establish yourself. Most arguments in house shares are caused by individuals acting in ways that are not judged to be acceptable by the group in shared spaces.

GiddyRobin · 17/12/2024 14:32

Of course it's fine! They're just boobs, they're not genitals. I've not worn a bra since my teens; I'm mid 30s now. I don't wear pasties or cardigans to cover up, either. Don't see why I should - if they don't like it, that's other people's issue. I'm not making myself uncomfortable to make someone else comfortable over something so silly.

I've never had a single comments either! No awkwardness. If someone does comment, then I'd consider them to be someone I had zero interest in knowing...and a bit of a prude with body issues.

Skyrainlight · 17/12/2024 14:43

Yes it's your home. I also think it's fine to go braless outside too (except perhaps in a professional environment), we don't owe anyone discomfort. I don't because it makes me uncomfortable but I respect women who do, good for them.

Garlicwest · 17/12/2024 14:44

I wonder if people (in the UK) realise how much more uptight they are than we 'boomers' were? I still maintain that everyone has a body that has a sex; trying to pretend we haven't is a non-starter, so you may as well let your nipples do what they do regardless 🙃