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Would you meet a friend with a cold?

51 replies

ohholynightt · 17/12/2024 08:53

I'm meant to be meeting my friend tomorrow for food and present exchange before Christmas
I have a stinking cold
Headache,sore throat and starting to sneeze
Now I'm just getting on with things but she has two kids
One is only 4
It's Christmas in a week
Although I would love to see her I really don't want to give her this cold
What would you do ?

OP posts:
Dontjudgeme101 · 17/12/2024 09:44

I would ring and arrange to meet either another time.

ohholynightt · 17/12/2024 09:55

@TheMousePipes my partner has had a bad one and off work today
Nearly a week later and not really any better
Really bad chesty cough

OP posts:
twobluehorses · 17/12/2024 09:57

Don't do it. It's really unfair to expose people right before Christmas. I have just spent a week feeling atrocious after my cleaner came whilst really ill. I am now massively behind for Christmas preps and still feel awful.

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wfhwfh · 17/12/2024 09:58

Firstly, I think you are really considerate to be thinking of this as a lot of people would just meet without informing their friend of their cold. I’ve been on the receiving end of this and it causes a lot of stress! So you’re obviously a respectful & courteous person.

What id do is tell my friend about the cold and suggest you dont meet for risk of infecting her. That way she knows the risk. She might suggest you meet briefly outside for a walk or be happy to cancel. But, whatever is decided, she’s consented to the risk which is the important thing. As long as she’s informed beforehand and knows you’re happy to cancel, you’ve done the right thing

theeyeofdoe · 17/12/2024 09:59

Cynic17 · 17/12/2024 09:10

Of course I would! She could just as easily catch a cold on the bus or in a shop. Friendship is more important than a few sniffles..... I can't believe people would be so flaky.

I wouldn’t want to meet up with someone who had a bad cold. I’d rather they cancelled.

TheMousePipes · 17/12/2024 09:59

ohholynightt · 17/12/2024 09:55

@TheMousePipes my partner has had a bad one and off work today
Nearly a week later and not really any better
Really bad chesty cough

Yes, the same here. Such an awful productive cough and really dreadful sinus pain. No appetite and super tired.

RestYeMerryGentlewomen · 17/12/2024 10:00

DH and I had to cancel a get together with really close friends as one of them was unwell. It’s just best not to plus they may feel obliged to if you give them a choice so you need to do the cancelling which is what our friends did.

TonTonMacoute · 17/12/2024 10:02

No.

Its a really horrible cold, I had it and still feel utterly drained.

TonTonMacoute · 17/12/2024 10:06

Cynic17 · 17/12/2024 09:10

Of course I would! She could just as easily catch a cold on the bus or in a shop. Friendship is more important than a few sniffles..... I can't believe people would be so flaky.

Yes, but she would blame OP fo it. Friendship is also about not ruining someone else's Christmas and New Year by giving them an awful virus.

DreamW3aver · 17/12/2024 10:09

Is there a reason you can't ask her what she'd prefer? That would seem to be more useful than asking the internet

lionloaf · 17/12/2024 10:11

I would just let my friend know and offer to drop the presents round. If she still wants to see you, that’s up to her. She may well have had the cold already and not be bothered, or she may want to avoid it. Leave it up to her. If you do see her, a lemsip beforehand so you aren’t sneezing and plenty of handwashing.

Hecatoncheires · 17/12/2024 10:17

Sorry, OP, I wouldn't want to meet up if I were your friend. In fact, I would be grateful for your thoughtfulness in not wanting to pass on your lurgy. Hope you feel better soon.

biscuitsandbooks · 17/12/2024 10:19

Nope. I'd be really pissed off if someone did that - especially just before Christmas.

biscuitsandbooks · 17/12/2024 10:20

Cynic17 · 17/12/2024 09:10

Of course I would! She could just as easily catch a cold on the bus or in a shop. Friendship is more important than a few sniffles..... I can't believe people would be so flaky.

What an odd point of view.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 17/12/2024 10:24

Depends.

If I was feeling too ill to enjoy it, I would cancel.

If I felt well enough, I would let the friend know and allow them to decide.

brokenwand · 17/12/2024 10:26

I would phone her & give her the option whether to meet or delay until after Christmas

Pinkmoonshine · 17/12/2024 10:27

If I felt like you, I would be staying at home not spreading germs just in time for Xmas.

RabbitsRock · 17/12/2024 10:28

Cynic17 it’s more than a few sniffles.

MovingBird123 · 17/12/2024 10:30

No I wouldn't. Or ask her "hey lovely, I'm really looking forward to seeing you tomorrow but I've got a massive cold. Shall we reschedule or would you still be happy meeting? I won't be offended if you'd rather not!"

HashtagShitShop · 17/12/2024 10:31

Normally if outside not a problem.

This year personally I wouldn't. For three years I've been really very poorly over the last Christmases. 2021 I had covid and pretty much lost all Dec, 2022 I had a horrendous cold that started on the 23rd. (both these were from the same household) and last year a horrendous infection that spread and was at risk of giving me sepsis and I had to do all Christmas shopping on one day in a lot of pain and with high fever and feeling atrocious. Had to get more antibiotics and was at hospital at one point so yeah....

I'm crossing everything and trying to avoid as much as possible to not be poorly this Christmas! Don't take the risk personally!

wfhwfh · 17/12/2024 13:19

Cynic17 · 17/12/2024 09:10

Of course I would! She could just as easily catch a cold on the bus or in a shop. Friendship is more important than a few sniffles..... I can't believe people would be so flaky.

Are you suggesting OP meets her friend without telling her beforehand she has a bad cold and giving her the option to cancel?

Because, if so, I think that’s really not acceptable. You’d essentially be making the decision for your friend (without their consent) that catch-up with you is worth risking weeks of illness over Christmas.

OP is being considerate and respectful

DappledThings · 17/12/2024 13:27

DreamW3aver · 17/12/2024 10:09

Is there a reason you can't ask her what she'd prefer? That would seem to be more useful than asking the internet

Quite. Why is it anyone's decision except hers? Just ask her.

oakleaffy · 17/12/2024 14:00

Cynic17 · 17/12/2024 09:10

Of course I would! She could just as easily catch a cold on the bus or in a shop. Friendship is more important than a few sniffles..... I can't believe people would be so flaky.

They might have vulnerable people visiting- elderly relatives or children with lung disease (CF)
It’s selfish to spread nasty bugs about.

DazedAndConfused321 · 17/12/2024 14:00

Stay home!

ohholynightt · 18/12/2024 08:12

Ended up cancelling
I feel even worse today
Weak and just awful
Friend read message and ignored me
So I think she's annoyed
I would rather cancel and her be annoyed than pass this on to her and her kids.
I'm hoping il be okay in a week

OP posts:
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