Can’t lift my baby

[Chronicallytired]

My 3 month old is in the 90th percentile and extremely heavy. I’m struggling to carry him or hold him for long periods my arms are killing. I’ve got a hip seat and a carrier but sometimes he just wants to be held by me. My partner is able to play with him lift him up etc where as I’m starting to not want to pick him up if my partner can. I suffer with fibromyalgia which I think maybe making it harder. I’m so sad about the fact I can’t hold him for long. If I had time I would go to the gym and maybe try get a bit stronger. I’ve always been on the weak side. He’s also starting to wriggle and move when held which is making it worse does anyone have any tips as he’s only going to get heavy. I know the longer I hold him and the more I do it will get easier I hope.

Its so tough, I've been there. But absolutely, the more you hold him the easier it gets.

It's like a race, as he gets heavier, you get stronger until their growth finally starts to slow down a bit when they get more active and crawling. That's when your body can catch up properly.

I would suggest plenty of protein rich foods to aid in muscle growth as well as plenty of water.

Another thing you could try is a zip up hoody on top of the hip seat so when he's sat on it you can wrap the side of it around him to make him more snug.

Could you pay a visit to your local sling library for a more supportive sling/carrier?
will he accept being held against you rocked in a rocking chair or glider? I used to do this when my arms ached! Either upright or laid on a breastfeeding cushion which I tied round my waist

I’ve been to a sling library but he hates going in them also cries if I sit down when holding him

Well realistically he's only going to get bigger, so you need to find ways to adapt.
3 months old can't support themselves so you have to take all the weight but in a few months he will be stronger and more able to support himself.
Presumably your partner won't be around all the time so you will have to find ways to manage.
Are you on any pain mens, under a physio or OT? An OT would be best placed to give you advice on making simple adaptations to daily living if needed.
My DD has Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and her joints dislocate constantly and has chronic pain. Gabapentin helps with pain but doesn't stop her joints slipping out of place. Her DS1 is now 3.. and was a chunk of a baby and now a decent sized preschooler (and she's heavily pregnant) and from the day he was born she has had to figure out the least painful ways of carrying him.
Frankly.. he's 3 months... they cry. But you can't walk round carrying him all day; that's not practical even when it's not painful. He will have to learn to be held sitting down, or in a sling, baby chair or pram! Or on the floor on a changing mat with a baby gym above to distract him. Time to get creative!