Any BahHumbug(s) here?

[KimmeyMakesGoodEggs]

I don’t mean to offend anyone with this thread and I don’t want to start a fight

As a child my family had good Christmasses. I loved the food, the parties, family together, the gifts. I was encouraged to believe in Santa. I don’t remember any fights or contention within my family. It was fun. But I was not super excited either. I liked the fact it was school holidays the most (in my country it is summer in December so Christmas is after the end of the school year and during summer holidays).

Then as an young adult I moved to a country where Christmas is not a big thing at all. Families don’t celebrate together unless they want a taste of what they see in the movies.
I didn’t miss Christmas and liked not having to take part or do anything related. I was with a partner who felt the same way and it was awesome.

Then I moved here and 1st Christmas was very low key. My housemates cooked, decorated etc, I took part just because it was in my house

Then met my new partner who loves Christmas so I went along with his celebrations. We had a child and I continued playing along but my heart was never in it.

Later on when we split up, my child started spending Christmas with them every year and I stopped doing it.
I still buy some lights for the house just because they like it but that is as far as I’d go in terms of decor. Offered a tree for their bedroom but they don’t want it.

In terms of gifts, I buy a lot of new things for myself and child throughout Dec but that is just us preparing for the new year.
People don’t expect any gifts / cards from me anymore and a few still give it to me which I try not to feel guilty about.

I also avoid Christmas events from work. Usually take AL when they book it.

It is not that I hate it.
It used to annoy me a lot more that everything is all about Christmas in Nov and Dec and (sorry) but people behave as if they are in some kind of cult (sorry) but that is how it looks like to me.

But nowadays people seem to accept (but not to understand) people who don’t celebrate or like Christmas a lot more - especially the ones like me who is not from a non christian religion or culture to back it up so have no real excuses except from being a Bah!Humbug!

I can’t help it. I just don’t feel anything. And I’m fine.

I do love having special food though but I suspect it is only because the supermarkets brainwash me (lol)

A part from my ex ex partner I’ve never met anyone like me. Are there some here? What is your story?

Why would u offend anyone or start a fight? It's hardly a controversial opinion. I have zero interest in Christmas. The only thing I'll enjoy about it is having a bit of time off work.

Because I dont want to do Christmas and I went along when I was married
Christmas has zero meaning to me

Yes on my own
Is just a day off - I do whatever I feel like, I dont have a ritual

Yes

Nothing odd with this. It's like if you married someone who celebrated Orthodox Christmas - would you be keeping your child with you every January and would you be forcing yourself through Christmas traditions you have zero interest or engagement with? Why? Out of spite or pettiness about taking turns when it's something that has some meaning to your ex and none to you?

This is me.
For my partner it is important and while one of the kids is still young and his parents are alive well we have to just get on with it. I fantasise about the day I don’t need to bother. At all.

The aim of this thread is to hear from ppl like me

Why all the questions?
It is a normal day for me without work - a day off

Friends and family?
They are doing whatever they want - it has nothing to do with me

I divorced when child was 7 and child is 20 now and has been spending Christmas with the other side of the family since the divorce. They accept me the way I am. Not a bid deal.

I have at best zero interest and at worst I actively despise Christmas things.

I see immediate family during this time, because I always have this time free (university closes down). Some of them 'do' Christmas, so I'm there and it's going on in the background. At least, it's in practice a long social occasion in this family, although I wish it were one without some of the trappings of Christmas and certainly without all the insufferable Christmas stuff everywhere beforehand.

I don't like Christmas food. Genuinely 25 December is one of the worse meals I eat all year (cooked by people who show themselves capable of cooking well at other times, I should add).

kimmey i do not do xmas not christan or anything religious

I feel similar op. I do the bits of Christmas I like, and don’t do the others. I have spent Christmas on my own and it was awesome. These days I am with my partner who cares even less than I do, lol. Each to their own. The stress some people put themselves under at this time of year is crazy, and people playing happy families when they are anything but happy just isn’t healthy.

YANBU to not like Christmas.
YABU to say that people 'seem like they're in a cult' for enjoying celebrating the one big festival of the year in their country/culture.

I'm ambivalent about Christmas, I was even as a kid. When I was single and worked away, I was supposed to do an extension over Xmas and New Year and I didn't tell my family I was home and had a peaceful, relaxing time.

I do make an effort now, because I have an 11 year old and she loves it.

You are not alone OP! I cannot see any point to it, and am more invested in the post Christmas period, the slow, but sure, lengthening of the days, the first snowdrops appearing, plants stirring in the garden, the birds thinking of pairing up - these are much more interesting things to look forward to!

I've got very little to no interest in it now. I used to like it more and make more of an effort but now I just find most of it all a bit tedious and wasteful. DS is also 20 and had their main present weeks ago.

I think this is my least enthusiastic year to date. DH feels the same. I'll probably force myself to put up a few decorations next weekend and get some Christmas food in! It will be ok. I scaled it back years ago. Maybe I took it too far...and that is part of the problem. Last Christmas DS was ill (and I was up most of the night with him) but still had to cook Christmas dinner I didn't want for the inlaws (who DH doesn't like)...can't believe that was a year ago! Haven't invited them this year.

I actually think it was very fair of you to send your DC to the side of the family that genuinely enjoys celebrating Christmas.

I am a full on bah humbug. I have been since my teens. I can't see the point of Xmas at all - I am an atheist, I see no point to it at all. I hate the time of year, I hate the greed, the spending, the tv stuff, the fact it's everywhere (at work for example - Xmas jumper day - fuck right off), I hate the fact people get into debt buying things for people when surely we all have enough 'stuff' anyway?
As soon as the Dc have left home I am never doing it again. Luckily dh is the same.

Exactly this. I endured and went along with my ex-husbands Christmas celebrations just because of the relationship and DC. I made an effort, I hosted in-laws , I decorated, I bought presents. I compromised.

Once the relationship broke down, they were very happy to know that they could have DC all for themselves every year during Christmas for as long as DC wanted to. I always gave DC a choice. They always chose to go and celebrate with the grandparents and dad rather than me which I was very happy about.

Why on earth would I take in turns, if Christmas means nothing to me me but everything tho DC, ExH and ExPils?
DC do not miss me at all during Christmas when they are gone because it is just a few days and there is absolutely no guilty feelings involved.
Everyone is happy and it is a win-win.

I'd be completely happy to skip Christmas. I'm an atheist. My kids are grown up. I don't care about getting presents, and I'd be happy never to send another card or buy a present, especially for the awkward so-and-sos in my family who don't know what they want yet are disappointed in anything I choose for them.