2 year old can’t sit still

[ProseccoParent]

My 2 year old has never ever been able to sit in one spot. As a baby she hated high chairs, contact naps, anything to do with being confined and could never eat her food without running around and picking at it throughout the day. Going out to places with her was and still is hell. In the car she whinges and screams and throws tantrums so by the time we even get to the place I’m absolutely exhausted from listening to her crap. Than to have to spend the entire time trying to persuade her to eat, sit down, chasing her around the restaurant or wherever we are the whole time. To trying to get her to watch something on the phone which doesn’t work for longer than 2 minutes. Oh my god I’m freaking drained. Now I thought this was normal behaviour yet my 10 month old baby is soo good she sits in the high chair, she eats her entire meals, she can sit down in one spot for ages. Yesterday we had to wait in hospital for over 2 hours and the entire time she was sat on my lap just babbling and happy she didn’t have any toys or any screens to entertain! She’s honestly a joy to take out, I can go shopping and she will nap in her pram whereas my toddler has never ever sat in the pram for longer than 5 minutes even as a baby/newborn she screamed in the pram. Now I know every child is different but is this normal?! And if it can someone please tell me she will get better or am I going to hate taking her out anywhere for the rest of my life?

She will probably get better with time, but it is tiring. If you know you will need to be somewhere & sit still later I would try to get some decent exercise early in the day. Reins if she’s a bolter.
have you tried any fiddle toys? Take eg a pot of playdoh
I would also be firm - if we’re eating, we sit down, running about, not eating. I would give up restaurants or at least restaurants where you have any expectation of being able to eat a meal & have a chat.
I would keep screens to as close to zero as possible. I would consider giving iPad time I. A cafe or restaurant so you can eat your meal.
Consider nursery a couple of times a week.
lastly, try really really hard not to label your children ‘good’ and ‘naughty’ they’re at different ages & stages & will present different challenges as they grow.

Oh god also never let her near haribo. I know the studies have disproven it but I swear they do something to my kids.

She goes to nursery twice a week, they have told us that they struggle to get her to sit down during meal times she just runs around and comes to table eats and runs around again. They’ve tried multiple ways of trying to get her to sit. She has never ever sat in a high chair, I’ve bought her a table and chair which didn’t do anything. She doesn’t have an iPad and I rarely give her screens because she doesn’t even stay still and watch. She is on the move constantly which is fine I understand she’s a toddler she has a lot of energy! She also doesn’t play with toys, I’ve bought so many different kinds of toys, puzzles, dolls, instruments, sensory, arts and crafts nothing entertains her. She picks up a toy and throws it across the room and repeats that with every single toy to the point where my room is just trashed with toys she doesn’t even play with.

Oh. Okay that does sound somewhat outside the usual. How does she play at nursery? Will she play with you?
have you tired something like a pikler triangle, also there are spinning dish things and rocking ones.

Sounds like my my eldest. I didn’t realise it wasn’t normal until I had my second child who was so much easier.

Eldest is now 8 and diagnosed with ADHD.

I have wondered if she has ADHD. Can this be something passed down by genetics? As her grandfather and uncle both have been diagnosed with it and take meds. Does your 8 year old have to take any meds to control it?

No I chose not to medicate my child at the minute, but am open to it as he gets older if he feels he needs it. For now we just modify his environment to meet his needs as best we can.

We were asked a lot about family history when going through the diagnosis so it’s something they do consider.

It took us 3 years to get the diagnosis on NHS so I recommend starting the process early if you have concerns.

Sorry, I hadn’t had a chance to come back to the thread. I don’t have specific adhd experience, there are boards here where you would be able to ask. She might be considered young to diagnose, but from what I have read it can be useful to start enquiring early& keeping notes & records.

I believe that adhd & autistic spectrum conditions can have a genetic component, so family history important.

Before you get to all that, and as pp you may find it helpful to research parenting techniques & modifications for children who express similar behaviours. Much of it (like much parenting tbh!) is trial and error & see what sticks.