I just saved someone’s life…

[Difficultfemale]

Ok not just, but this morning. Was on the way to work, brilliant mood, high vibe tunes in the car, driving over a motorway bridge and noticed a man stood looking over the railings. On a closer look he had cans of alcohol around his feet and was stood on the bottom rung rather than the pavement. I just knew.

Stopped in the road and wound down my window to speak to him, but as I was doing this he started to climb over. Adrenaline kicked in and before I knew it I’d jumped out of my car, left it with the engine running in the middle of the road, doors open, and was running over. He was completely on the other side of the railings when I got to him. Gripped him and somehow managed to pull him over the railings. He was clearly under the influence of many, many, substances as he just wanted to ‘fly’ and was fighting the whole time. At this point I was feeling a bit out of my depth, to say the least. Unable to let go, unable to call police, I had clearly not thought this through and the panic was setting in quickly. I was screaming for help (rush hour traffic) and luckily, after what felt like an age, a man stopped to help and rang the police. The relief I felt on seeing him was immense! Luckily we managed to keep him safe until the police came but it felt like forever. I’ve had a courtesy call to let me know that thankfully he’s in a mental health suite and getting the help he needs.

Anyone else have a similar story they can share? And/or advice on how to deal with it, if (god forbid) I, or anyone else here, ends up in a similar situation ever again?

Thank you x

Am in tears reading this , bless you x

If this bridge was over a road, you've not only saved one person's life , you've saved the drivers on the road who could have been hurt by the person falling and them also having to deal with that trauma. Take care of yourself.

Oh @PickleJelly I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. The “what ifs” can be torture. I found going to SOBS sessions helped me cope. It’s 18 years for me, and although it will always be with me, to a large extent I’ve made my peace with it now.

I hope you’re able to find your own peace. It’s trite to say but it does get easier with time. Threads like this make me very aware of that. I can read and rather than sadness, just feel wonder and gratitude for what @Difficultfemale has done today

Sorry I haven't read the whole thread just the OP.
I still have very intense flashbacks to a life I saved and feel unbearably emotional when I think of it.
Luckily the parent of the child and the (now grown up) child feel the same and keeping in touch with them has helped somewhat.
It's weird and big, make space for it!

Well done op, what a brave and kind thing to do! 💐

Wow, that's so brilliant OP. Well done, but yes-look after yourself xxx

Please do talk it through if that's what helps you process. It doesn't need to be anyone trained, it could be over a cup of tea with a friend who is a good listener, could be a colleague, hr, local vicar, gp may have suggestions of volunteers who are able to help in such situations but if this isn't enough there is more formal support available.

I've talked someone down from a railway bridge and I was shaking inside but apparently calm outwardly. I must admit I processed it by my team insisting on a trip to the pub at lunchtime (back when it was acceptable) and simply talking about it to them, friends and family who listened.

OP, I'll share my experience - it's not the same but can perhaps be a bit helpful.

When I was about 13 I saved my two year old sister's life, sort of. We were on holiday in Greece staying in a private villa and were getting ready to go out for dinner. I'd just dressed up in a new purple dress and was feeling quite pleased with myself and I decided to go for a walk around the swimming pool, which was gated off from the house and couldn't be seen properly.
I walked around the pool and suddenly saw my sister at the bottom of it. Jumped in and scooped her out, cue a scene of absolute panic where I was patting her on the back for what seemed like forever while she was coughing up her guts. I carried her back to the villa screaming, absolutely dripping wet from this dress, when my parents suddenly appeared and saw the state of the both of us. Loads of shouting and more panic while I was standing there staring down at this new dress and wondering what the fuck had just happened.
An hour later, we were all (ten family members in total) sitting together in a restaurant. I'd been told to get changed and I was allowed to pick anything I wanted to eat that night. It was never really mentioned to me again, but I know there was some kind of formal action (the villa was misrepresented and the gate on the pool was broken) and we moved to another villa the next day.

Anyway, I have no idea why the fuck my parents weren't watching my two year old sister that evening or why what happened was so underplayed, but I wish I'd had the opportunity to talk about it and had received some counselling.
I still to this day have recurrent nightmares of me jumping into that pool in that bloody dress. When I think about what could have happened if I hadn't randomly showed up for that walk I feel physically sick - I feel sick typing this right now. Take time to process such a traumatic event and don't underestimate how it might make you feel.

(NC from normal account because if any family members are on here they'll recognise me in an instant. I'm estranged from them now. Funny that.)

Wow @Tracystubbs, how amazing, things like this do make me wonder if people are sometimes put on each others path for a reason. I quite often drive a different route to work and something made me go the other way today. If I hadn’t I wouldn’t have drove past him and god knows what would have happened. I think it’s a privilege to have been able to help and the fact that you’re still in touch with the man you helped must be so life affirming for you! Really incredible.

@mindutopia I hope you’re ok 💐. I’ve been in hospital a few times for surgery and it’s a strange little bonding experience being on a ward isn’t it! It’s a wonder that we can have these fleeting moments in other people’s lives, not know their names and never see them again but they will always be with us somehow. I’m sure he thinks of you too.

Oh my god @Thepurpledress I’ve just absolutely howled laughing at this story despite its seriousness, thank you! I really hope you made the absolute most of being able to order what you liked, I’d have been in a feta and pastry induced coma for the remainder of the holiday.
Thanks for sharing, and it’s never too late to get help, I’m only just getting therapy for something that happened to me 20 years ago. It’s a process but it has made a huge difference to how I feel.

You did a wonderful thing, well done. I can imagine you feel pretty shaken up now though.

I saved a child's life at school once - I was supply teaching and a girl aged about 10 ran into my class, obviously choking and unable to breathe (turned out she'd sneaked out to grab a bite of a sandwich and it had got stuck in her throat). I had to whack her between the shoulder blades really hard 2 or 3 times, and thankfully the food just flew out. I then had to continue teaching the lesson! Obviously I went to report the entire incident to the Head afterwards, but I felt quite unnerved by it all for days, and even now, 20 years later, I still think about it/her.

I couldn't tell you what I ordered if you paid me a million quid. The whole evening was a blur. And that was one of their many parental failings unfortunately.

It sounds very much like your (useless) parents downplayed it to also downplay their carelessness. Or should we term in neglect. Not letting a toddler wander into a swimming pool is pretty basic parenting. You didn't just "sort of" save your sister's life, you absolutely did save her. 13 year old you was amazing. I only wish you'd been given some help with processing the traumatic event.

Awwww, well done. Hope you're ok - and hope he is too...

I’m really bad as when I saw someone on a roof pretending to jump, I just told them to go for it.
However many hours later, after police closed the road, and the perpetrator had thrown roof tiles onto the street, onto the cars, broken windows and generally caused mayhem, the police eventually got them off the roof (1-2 days later).
It would have been much easier if they had just jumped, but it was just an empty threat!

Absolutely this @nocoolnamesleft (cool name btw). You are amazing @Thepurpledress

Well done OP. It’s been proven that the sooner you get counselling after a traumatic incident, the better your chance of not developing ptsd. So perhaps your therapist could focus on this for a few weeks.

Amazing. Well done for being so brave, quick thinking and strong minded. Definitely talk it through and appreciate yourself because you are in the minority and the world needs more people like you.

I once found a toddler dressed only in a nappy wandering into our busy road at night on his own. Luckily he could gesture which was house. The parents didn't even seem fazed and didn't thank me.

well done, so many people these days would just pull out their phone and hit record.

Amazing you did that. Must have been so frightening