Disappointed but probably BU

[LovesCompany]

It was my birthday this week. I love my birthday, which is childish, I know. Had a shit last 6 months with cancer and major surgery.

DH doesn’t work at the moment and money is tight.

We had bought some slightly nicer than usual food for a birthday lunch but instead by surprise DH took me out for lunch to an eye-wateringly expensive restaurant. It was really nice but obviously I couldn’t entirely relax as I was a bit worried about the expensive.

However, no gift at all. DH knows I love flowers (and am fine with supermarket ones), novels by specific, prolific authors, and coffee, which all make lovely, inexpensive gifts and any of which I would have been delighted by.

He is not at all tight just incredibly disorganised which I find a bit thoughtless.

I don’t know what my post is saying, really. Sorry.

Oh see I’d think this was probably the more thoughtful option, after a tough few months and knowing you like celebrating your birthday he’s organised a nice meal, quality time together, to celebrate together. I’d see that as far more thoughtful than a bunch of Tesco flowers and a book.

Yes but she's paying for the meal! That's not a treat.

And he gets the treat as well. That's not a birthday present.

I think you’re being a bit harsh.

But by that logic she would also be paying foe the presents, so that’s also not a treat. At that point there would be nothing at all for a birthday?

I'd prefer to pay for a book if that's what I wanted that was clearly just for me for my birthday than for a very expensive meal for both of us.

Thanks, everyone. Neither DH nor I are foodies and because of medication and pain eating is not really a pleasure for me at the moment. But it was certainly a treat to go somewhere so nice.

Oh and I was also a little sad to have no candles to blow at (at home not in the restaurant) or someone singing Happy Birthday (also at home!) DH said he had thought of getting a cake in the morning but he was delayed because of public transport (and had to get back for our surprise restaurant reservation) and then he said he was going to get one when we went out later, but in the end didn’t.

Update: after my birthday DH texted the DC to ask them to buy some sweets from the supermarket for my birthday as they’re the ones I used to like when I was a child and we bought them on holiday recently. DS12 went to get them but got it wrong but then ate them as he likes the ones he bought. DH moaned to me that DS didn’t return his change.

It’s very childish to love my birthday so much and build up such high expectations but I just feel silly for making such an effort for everyone else’s birthday, I should have just sorted my own.