How would I get DS checked for autism or ADHD

[Biggiebiggiecantuc]

I have a feeling that there is something not right with my DS. I cannot put my finger on it and he doesn’t seem to meet the definition of autism or ADHD but something seems wrong with him.

1. lots of day dreaming
2. lots obsessing over things
3. occasional melt downs which seem very strange for his age - he is 11

He has dyslexia but the school aren’t interested in any other concerns because he normally keeps quiet and does his work.

Any idea who can I speak to? GP said he’ll grow out of doing these things.

If you've already taken him to a doctor, and they didn't notice any of the signs, then I guess all you can do is get a second opinion.

So far you have no concerns from school or doctor.

My dd is on pathway for adhd diagnosis, like your ds school haven't said anything because she's not disruptive at all, but pretty much as soon as we sat down at the doctors, she noticed it. Notes said that dd didn't sit still at all, I hadn't thought anything of it.

You need refferal from the school really and it's not easy we are 14 month into the waiting list after school and cahms reffered my child.

Firstly, looking through both your and DH family tree have you got anyone else who might fit either criteria. Both conditions are inherited so look and see if you have people with addiction problems, diagnosed with MH issues, loners, people who have struggled with relationships so lots of divorces or not keeping a job or on the more extreme end institutionalised in the past.

If the GPs aren't interested it's unlikely you'll have much luck on the NHS, in many places the wait is many years long and only for those whose condition is an issue for other people through challenging behaviour.

If you go private you need to look for a clinic that follows NICE guidelines. The Autism assessment will cost around £2.5k and took 6 weeks from initial enquiry to having the report in my hand. I didn't involve the GP at all and the school filled in their questionnaires indicating no autism signs at all which was what I expected. However, since having her diagnosis they recognize how DDs traits present in her and are very accommodating.

Another cheaper option is to have a private ED Psych do a WISC V assessment, this looks at various academic skills and Processing and Working memory and was more useful than DDs actual ASD diagnosis really. It will help identify his strengths and weaknesses and children who have autism or ADHD will have a very spiky profile where they are very good at some skills but not others, so you could use the results of this assessment to decide whether to pursue the more expensive assessment.

It depends on where you live. Some areas you need to be referred through your GP, other areas the parent refers their child. Where I live the parent has to refer for autism assessment but the GP has to refer for adhd assessment. I would recommend reading up on the diagnostic criteria for both and considering whether your child meets either. If they do then you can use this as evidence for why they should be assessed.

One of my kids I suspect of having 'something' but he doesn't fit neatly into any box, so I've ended up going to a private paediatrician for advice. It's an expensive option but saves on getting him assessed for multiple conditions which he might not even have.

The signs you list could all be his dyslexia though.

Daydreaming can be a stress response because the task at hand is difficult. So the brain is putting it off or finding an escape.

Obsessing over things could be having control over things because he struggles and has no control over reading / writing.

Meltdowns could easily be overload from having to work so much harder than everyone else all day and simply running out of patience or battery and simply not coping.

My (adult) DD did this initial online assessment, and based on the results was able to self refer to GP. She then had to do an intensive assessment, which I also had to do. The results of that then referred her to a psychologist and she was officially assessed and received a positive diagnosis. All the time she was at school I asked the teachers to get the SENCO to work with her, but they all denied she had an issue. I feel that she was short changed by education staff, and I really wished I had pursued it further to get her more help
.www.mdapp.co/snap-iv-teacher-and-parent-rating-scale-18-and-26-items-calculator-491/

The Ed Psychologist route is the one I would prefer. Would they be able to rule out ASD or ADHD?

No, if he shows traits then they won't but from the little you've shared he doesn't sound autistic anyway.

I'd be leaning into the fact actually he is just really struggling with his dyslexia.

Does he have anything outside of school that he is good at and excels at? That's really important if he is finding the overall school day mentally exhausting

One of my children didn't get a diagnosis until they were 18 because our GP wasn't interested. They ended up with mental health issues and had to see a psychiatrist who diagnosed them with autism straight away. To get the official diagnosis we had to self refer but luckily didn't wait long (pre covid). I wish I had been more insistent now because school was miserable for them but at the time there was not so much information available. When we had the assessment they said that someone won't necessarily tick every single box but that doesn't mean that they don't have it so it's worth pursuing even if it's to rule it out.

Where we are the gp does the referral but the NHS waiting list is so long we'll never get seen

School senco advised to use right to choose - find a provider who does right to choose then ask gp to refer there

I decided to pay as round here it's still a 2 yr wait & ds wants to know

He is actually doing well at school - he is meeting expectations. The dyslexia diagnosis was a complete shock, although it did explains some things.

He may well be doing well at school but that might be because he is working twice as hard mentally to do well so he gets tired easier, that leads to the meltdowns, obsessing and even the day dreaming. I've taught many dyslexic students who have described similar things to me, being irritable when they get home and being exhausted etc.

It might be something else but the dyslexia is the likely cause.

School referral is needed. GP won’t act without school referral. Current waiting list is 2 years.

I enquired about going private but a doctor friend advised against it saying that all the private diagnosis are regarded as suspect and the NHS won’t then prescribe medication which costs £100s per month.

So we are waiting. But school are supportive and have put supports in place regardless.

Thank you, your posts are enlightening.

He has his formal dyslexia assessment next year which I am hoping shed light on some of his problems.

Same in our borough- the school don’t think anything mishearing because he is generally so well behaved. Even his dyslexia was noted by a new year in year 6 - it wasn’t picked up by any of his other teachers

You will struggle to get an ADHD diagnosis without school on board, even privately as it requires evidence from 2 settings, typically home and school.

For autism we took a long list of traits and the GP was happy to refer, again though we had the backing of school as they could see something

Is there a reason why they need evidence from 2 settings: some children behave totally different at home compare to school.

I hope this thread acts as a corrective against the increasingly common view on MN that diagnoses are 'handed out like sweets'. It takes most families years to get to the bottom of a child's difficulties.

I'm not sure if DS has transitioned to secondary, but sad to say, what often happens is that the increased pressures of secondary school life expose functional difficulties more clearly.

If you have evidence of your child struggling, which a GP is dismissing, consider changing GPs. Have a look at the NICE guidelines on assessment.

Diagnostic criteria do require evidence of significantly impaired functioning in key areas of life.

@Biggiebiggiecantuc

Is there a reason why they need evidence from 2 settings: some children behave totally different at home compare to school.

I have no idea, but you are not wrong.

Look up 'right to choose' you can initiate a referral through private providers which the NHS pays for / it just differs by county. You are in control of the referral and they normally then subsequently send electronic questionnaires to school.

I am having a nightmare with this. My dd is diagnosed dyspraxic, I suspect there is more. Aunt on one side is just about to pursue adult asd assessment, dad (otherside) is adult diagnosed adhd.

School won't refer but they also won't complete the form sent for a private MH assessment.

I am going to escalate to head, there is addiction issues on both sides, massive self harm on one side. All down to it not being recognised and dealt with in childhood.

My dd has already self harmed - if there is any chance at all that there is an underlying diagnosis I am going to fight to get it, I don't want her going down the same path.

Have you had a look at the SEND code of practice 2015? It sets out what schools must do, including when assessing for special educational needs. It may help you frame requests to school?

Thanks @Lunedimiel I'll have a look.

Dyslexia and daydreaming are very common if you google it. I think there is often also a lot of overlap between ND conditions, so I have a brother for example diagnosed with Dyspraxia with autistic traits. The other traits may be part of your ds's dyslexia or there may be more to them that warrants a separate diagnosis.

He would need issues with social communication to get an ASD diagnosis - for example does he struggle with friendships, is he a black and white thinker, take things literally, talk too loudly, too close to people, talks at people about the things he loves? Does he struggle with transitions, is he emotionally immature or have any sensory issues for example? I know less about ADHD so I'm not sure what they would be looking for for diagnosis there, but read up on it and see if he ticks the boxes.

You don't need to look back at your family tree though - he is already diagnosed with one ND condition so that already means he could potentially have any of the others. I have a brother, son, uncles and cousins all diagnosed with different ND conditions.

Don't be too worried about what school say, ds's school made him sound perfect - but he was diagnosed by an NHS specialist who knew their stuff in less than an hour. We didn't have to go through CAHMs thankfully, we went straight to paediatrician who specialised in ASD. Things may be different for ADHD but masking for both conditions is common.

Do you need school to refer? Can you not go to GP and get a referral? I think you have a very, very good case here. Read up on all symptoms of ASD/ADHD and note down as many relevant things as you can find with examples of them from your dd. I would read up on Aspergers syndrome because although this is an out of date term now, for your dd to get to this age without diagnosis it's likely that she would have got an Aspergers diagnosis when it was a thing just like mine did. Good luck, she's lucky to have her mum fighting for her.