6m old milestones - nervous

[RolyPolyOll]

Hi all, I’m not too sure where to post but haven’t spent so many hours this week googling and finding old posts and getting myself scared and worked up.

I have booked a private paediatrician appt but in the meantime can I possibly have some reassurance? I have two main worries about my little one and wondered if anyone else has experienced similar?

1 - He cannot sit even aided. If I try, he pushes his legs out or pushes himself to lie flat down again. Leans to one side in his high chair.

2 - He gags on even the most liquidised puree and even with purée he vomits whilst eating it. We do offer finger foods and he sucks them and then gags and doesn’t swallow anything.

He IS very alert, giggly, smiley, rolls around all the time and is generally quite happy. But the above two are scaring me, particularly when seeing pics of other 6m olds demolishing a plate of food or siting up. I’m worried about a neurological issue and it’s eating me up.

Thank you! I’ve got the private paed appt, a GP appt and a HV appt!

My 2 year old was behind in all milestones, started walking not long before her second birthday. Wasn't talking, is now saying new worlds almost daily.
HV wasn't worried as she could see my toddler was communicating in her own way.
HV said something insightful: everything is centred around stats which it is, and yet what these stats don't take into account is that every child is different.
Not all children will be at the levels that some babies are at. Just let babies be babies, they will progress when they are ready.
HV also said they look out for certain warning signs, but I bet you anything the things you have said aren't any warning signs.
Relax, let baby... enjoy being baby!
I know it's hard but anyone will tell you if you google headache then google will tell you it's a symptom of a brain tumour.
Google can be very overdramatic.

This sounds completely normal.

Babies definitely don’t sit up unaided at 6 months without falling over fairly quickly. The ‘sit up unaided’ bit is just about being able to sort of be wedged up in a high chair so they don’t slump and choke. Neither of mine sat unaided without falling over within a minute or so before maybe 8 months.

Gagging is totally normal. It’s just them learning to control food in their months, which is easier to do with finger foods. Neither of mine ate significant amounts before 10 months.

If anyone is claiming to have some unicorn 6 month old who does all these things, they are probably embellishing quite a bit. We had one of these in our NCT group. Always the first to do everything. They were just quite anxious about their baby so just made up all sorts of stuff. Save your money on a private consultation and do something nice with your baby instead.

Thank you for this. My worry with the unaided part is he won’t sit aided! As in he just won’t. He just flings himself back!

Your post is really helpful in that I keep comparing my son to my daughter but actually things he did “early” eg smiling and rolling, she did rather “late”. So I must remind myself of that.

So he was almost a month early? I'd wait a few weeks before fretting.

So what if children born the same month, have different skills - if he is the youngest of the month and born 3 weeks early and the children you are comparing him to are the oldest of the month and were over due thats potentially a whole 9 weeks difference - that's massive at his age. I'd wait another 4 weeks and if no improvement ask for a referral to agencies already mentioned .

And for the love of god and your own well being step away from social media, comparison is the thief of joy.

What I might do in the meantime is go swimming regularly to help develop muscle.

No, not at six months old unless it is evident to the extent where you'd consider the child to be disabled - ie very extreme! (I am hypermobile and have two hypermobile children).

Honestly OP you do not need private appointments with a paediatrician or a physio! You might need one, and I say this with kindness, with a your GP (or a post-natal MH professional) for you. You sounds very anxious.

Your baby sounds completely and utterly normal. Loads of babies aren't ready to wean at bang on six months. It's a safe starting point not a target for when they 'should' be able to eat. Neither of mine took to weaning easily and were definitely well over seven months before they swallowed anything other than milk, even smooth purée.

Not sitting, or wanting to sit, at six months is also fine and doesn't mean anything is wrong. Six months is so little!

Your baby sounds content and developing at their own pace within the realms of normal and average expectations.

Could there be an issue? Of course, no one can tell you that on a forum. But from what you've said you've nothing to be concerned about.

If you're really worried then ask to see your health visitor. You shouldn't have a 12 month development check anyway.

Comparison is the thief of joy. It doesn't matter what other babies are doing, don't compare them. Also do bear in mind that half of what you see from people on these mum groups with their wonder babies who're bashing through their milestones is bullshit, or one well timed picture. Some won't be, but lots will be. Wait until baby starts school and then the real competitive nonsense begins!

In short, hahaha....chill!

Could it simply be he’s uncomfortable? Maybe the high chair is hard or the padding is jabbing him or he’s feeling tired or too awake or frustrated?

I think by all means see the HV and GP, but don’t waste your money going private. He’s still completely in the range of normal developmentally. I’d give it a month and see how much things change in that time. Best thing for helping him to sit is lots of tummy time and being worn in a sling (not the outward facing non ergonomic ones) as that’s how they build back and neck strength.

My little boy didn't sit aided/unaided until around 8 months. At 10 months he started crawling.
He is 14 months now and still doesn't walk.
He went from not sitting, to looking like he always sat in literally one afternoon.

He also doesn't eat anywhere nearly as much as those 6 month babies on the internet apparently eat (I don't believe for a second they actually eat what is claimed, most will end on floor!).

But he watches everything! He does lots of animal noises, and the words he does say always covey meaning, he doesn't babble at all. So he puts all his energy into watching and learning.

What I'm trying to say, is they all do everything in their own way and in their own time. Your boy will probably be prioritising something else over eating and sitting.

Thank you so much everyone. I need to calm down and chill and realise I shouldn’t compare. He is an adorable smiley boy (who has very tickley cheeks I learnt today!) and sitting here and comparing him to random babies isn’t helping me or him.

I agree with the others, don't worry to much what the Internet says but go and see your GP to settle your mind.
My DS never crawled and struggled with sitting by himself.
He started bum shuffleling at around 9 months and wasn't really interested in walking until 2.
Speaking was another issue, he didn't get a whole sentence out until he started school.

He's 14 now, mouth is working brilliantly- although the choice of words can be questioned. He's not overly sporty but does just fine.

I don't know how your baby is, but my DS was quite small and delicate compared to other babies. He was in tiny baby clothes & new born clothes for a long time.

In comparison, my DD was only a few weeks in newborn size.

This is such a kind reply. Thank you ❤️

The NHS guidance is really helpful - https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/baby/weaning-and-feeding/babys-first-solid-foods/

Your baby is very early in their food journey! I did baby led weaning so my DD didn't ever eat purees (and just tended to smash food around for the first few months of food), and she is a very healthy and happy three year old now :)

This is a fab website! Thank you.

My three were utterly useless at anything weaning related until at least ten months. They did a lot of messing around and playing with food but honestly most times I felt I might as well not have bothered! The rolling is very positive. Re the sitting have you tried something like a bumbo? Might help him get the idea?

And actually to add he just started touching his feet on his back today so that is some sort of progress?! I have not tried a Bumbo, off to google one now!

We were nearly 7 months - she wasn’t as secure at sitting as I would like - and then she was poorly so I waited … the amount she can eat at three is slightly mind boggling .

and while she wasn’t quite sitting securely until nearly 7months - now, she’s been put in the 6-9 year old gymnastics classes because of her physical ability - so they definitely change! Kid’s now solid muscle 💪

AMAZING! Olympics 2040!!

@RolyPolyOll I was honestly a nightmare for comparing, I used to get all monthly baby update emails that would excitedly tell me, "this month your baby will be rolling/crawling/standing", and I'd be thinking, er no he isn't 😂 my friend's babies were hitting these milestones and he had no interest in doing any of it! I really wish I'd have just trusted the process and realised he would do it when he was ready. Everyone always said he was the happiest baby they'd ever seen and it makes me sad that I didn't truly enjoy that experience of him being such a happy little boy through worrying about what he "wasn't" doing, so please enjoy the fact that he is smiley and happy and don't stress about the rest!

With the sitting unaided, all we did was let him sit up on the bed where it was fine if he toppled over, he used to love it! Then around 8 month ish he just sat and never fell and that was the start of him sitting unaided!

Definitely don’t get a bumbo- they are banned/recalled in several counties :

www.nhslanarkshire.scot.nhs.uk/patient-information-leaflets/neonatal-department/pil-devcrp-21-19492-l/#:~:text=PLEASE%20NOTE%20that%20we%20do,learn%20to%20sit%20and%20walk.

My oldest dd was slithering all over the place at 4 months, but didn't sit until she was about 7 months, and was then walking at 9.5 months!
My second didn't want to look at food until 9 months, she just didn't let it in, and would gag if it did get in.
My 3rd was sitting nicely at 6 months, crawling at 7, but then didn't walk until 22 months.
My point is, that all children are different, and develop at different rates, and a baby born nearly a month early is likely to reach some milestones, at this stage a bit later. It is ok!

How come you didn't just call the HV for a development assessment?

We are having one but it’s booked up for a while.

My daughter could barely hold her head up at 6 months (she inherited her dad's fat head and needed extra time to weight train her neck muscles 🤣) and didn't enjoy food until she was at least 8 months. She's a fully fledged walking, moderately talking ravenous fiend of a toddler now! He's got time, don't panic yet 😊

Thank you for this. He is so diff to my daughter!

Btw regarding your second, how did you help her with the gagging? Any tips would be appreciated. So far we are being very calm and if he throws up he gets a clean and a cuddle and no more food and we try again the next day.