Ridiculously irrational handhold, anyone around?

[IrrationalIvy]

Any chance anyone is around for a particularly irrational handhold? DH is out this evening, and the last time he went out, I had my first ever panic attack. Obviously my irrational brain has decided this is now a ‘thing’ and I’ve been consumed by panic & anxiety all evening, while trying not to wake DD4. I can’t get hold of him on his mobile as I think the signal must be a bit wonky so am sitting here having a bit of a cry, and trying to ignore the feeling of impending doom and get some nice deep calming breaths but failing dismally. I’m just not sure what to do with myself next - he could be out til 1, 2am and at the moment, I can’t fathom another 2 or 3 hours of feeling like this.

Not to play down what you're feeling, so sorry if this sounds like it, but have you tried watching something "bingeworthy"? Possibly something you've watched before but not for a while, where it's familiar and you kind of feel like the characters are your friends? It's literally brain numbing for a lot of people, which is why it's so popular... Friends, 30 Rock, Scrubs, Jane the Virgin, any of that nonsense.

Or video games if you ever play? Something soothing like the Sims. I used to play when waiting to see if IVF was successful, and could easily pass a few hours without thinking about anything at all. Really did stop me feeling anxious / worried, silly though that might sound x

Well, DD has just marched in complaining she’s “awake and can’t sleep” which never happens, so either I’ve woken her up with my deep breathing efforts, or she sensed something was up but we’re going to watch a couple of episodes of Bluey before trying bed again so I’m hoping against hope that will break the cycle for tonight. I know I’ll need to confront this head on, as DH will be out a couple of more times before Christmas (still nothing from him, texts remain infuriatingly on ‘delivered’) and I can’t be sitting here feeling like this again, so will take onboard all of the suggested strategies people have mentioned to try and bolster my armoury.

Sleep tight OP. We'll all still be around for a bit. Take care.

Stop castigating yourself as "silly". Piling annoyance with yourself on top of the anxiety will only make you feel worse.