Second baby or house move first

[zebranotzeebra]

Not sure what the best topic is for this but here goes! DH and I live in a two bed at the moment with DD 2.5. We have been house hunting for about 6 months with no luck - though saying that, we have been quite picky so far so there could be room to compromise further if we needed something quickly.

I always imagined a three year age gap between children but various family circumstances (including the house hunting) have delayed us a bit this year and we haven't yet started on TTC no 2.

Essentially my dilemma is, do we start TTC now and run the risk of having a second child in a smallish two bed, or do we wait a bit longer to see what comes on the market but accept we'll end up with a bigger age gap? For further context, I'm 33, DH is 35 and we conceived DD the second month of trying. Obviously things can be different each time but I have no reason to assume we'll struggle.

I'm aware there's no right answer and also aware that people can and do have multiple children in smaller houses, plus the baby would be in with us for at least 6 months anyway so realistically even if we fell pregnant in January there would be over a year before it became urgent to move. But equally, I'd rather move with just one child than two if possible!

As I say, no right answers here, just interested in what others would do?

I would crack on and ttc - nothing is a given and it might well clarify the mind when house hunting!

Inagine that you’ve waited a year from now and you’re near exchange and then someone pulls out - how would you feel then about having waited?

If that were us, I’d want the baby and my H would want the house move.

Possible compromise: time limit of a year before starting to TTC and stop being so picky about the new house.

I’d go for trying for a baby; we moved when I was 6 months pregnant and with a toddler; wasn’t ideal but I didn’t want to wait as I felt that I didn’t know how long it would take

I think I’d TTC - the baby will be in your room anyway for the first 6/12 months. I was in this situation but before I had DC, wondering whether to move first or get pregnant. In the end we chose to have a baby and I’m really glad we did, although living in a top floor flat with a baby was not fun! But I was in my 30s and didn’t want to risk not having DC. We also found the perfect home a year later and everything came together. Best of luck to you!

Baby will be in your room anyway, i'd crack on and TTC.

We prioritised the house, took 18 months to find something, we then started TTC after going sale agreed on a new build house. Second lockdown happened, house went under delay after delay, we moved in 22 months after we initially signed the contract and DC2 was 9 months old and a month before I was due back off maternity leave, talk about bad timing 😬🙈.

Id just start TTC in your shoes honestly, so much about buying a house is outside your control

Thanks, interesting that it's unanimous for TTC. Hadn't expected that but I totally see the sense in it. Has confirmed to me I definitely don't want to wait a year ... Need to talk to DH again and come to a proper decision about exactly when. Thanks for the responses, lots of food for thought.