Hi
Apologises it’s a bit of a long one!
im just needing some advice at the moment as iv left a really horrible relationship and lost my baby all in the last 2 weeks and questioning my own sanity at the min.
so basically my partner moved from London to Liverpool to try and win me back after cheating on me with his children’s mum. This woman knew all about me, when he was visiting me he would be FaceTiming her phone to speak to the kids next to me knowing what they were doing. It took a while but eventually after him living up here I ended up taking him back
he has 3 kids to her, a 5yr old, 4yr old and a 2yr old. This woman has 8 kids, never worked a day in her life and is a absolute low life.. sends the kids up here dirty, doesn’t care about them going to school, her 2yr old sits there drinking bottles of Coca Cola. She is honestly awful. Whenever the kids are here I buy them all kinds, take them everywhere and do what I can to make their weekend enjoyable. They usually come down every other weekend and during school holidays. He has his own flat he stays at with the kids but when they aren’t here he basically lives with me.
so Thursday 15th me and my partner discovered I was pregnant during the evening, didn’t have much time to talk or process it as we had to drive to bham next morning to pick his kids up half way who wer coming down until the Sunday. Again, I gave them a lovely weekend and Saturday asked what time they were going back Sunday. He replied “theyr not there staying down until Tuesday”. In this time I start to get very poorly. Tuesday came and he tells me he doesn’t know when they are going back now and it’s none of my business, I questioned why they’re not back in school as I didn’t understand why he would keep them down knowing what we have going on and just leave them out of school like that but was basically told to shut up. On Wednesday I end up collapsing and get taken to hospital, he meets me there and I’m told I have a pregnant of unknown location and need to go back Friday for further blood testing. He promised me he would put the kids to bed early that night and come and stay with me.. which he let me down and didn’t. Friday came and he didn’t come to the hospital to find out if our child was going to make it or not as he has no body to mind the kids. At this point I decided to block him because I had enough.
Sunday came and I ring him to drop his belongings off. I heard the kids mum in the background and asked what was going on, he told me she was down and staying at his and it’s my own fault for blocking him, he’s taking her to the Christmas markets and if I carry on he will just move her down and marry her. That night I began bleeding I was so distressed and upset.
once the kids went back to London Monday his abuse turned horrendous. Threatening me if I think I’m ever moving on and meeting anyone else he will have blood run through the streets of Liverpool. No man will ever be around his child. None of my friends had better go to any apps over my pregnancy cos he will turn up and batter her etc. I begged him to stop as it was making me ill. Thursday came and I started bleeding very heavy so got taken back to hospital, I was told it was likely i was losing the baby and had to go back Monday for more bloods as the scan wasn’t showing any development from my last one. He came to stay that night and was all apologetic for arguing but said his kids come first and it’s nothing to do with me how long they are down and he doesn’t have to support me if he has his children. The next morning after he left I began having horrendous pain and passing clots so I rang him scared asking him to please come back and help me as I was losing the baby, his exact words where “I’m going to London to pick my son up what do u want me to do about it. If your that bad ring a anbulance”. Left me losing the baby on my own on the bathroom floor.
now I know kids should always come first but please advise me on if you think in these circumstances I’m unreasonable to think why the hell could he not of at least prioritised the fact I was going through HELL on my own and he didn’t support me once. I was in and out of hospital on my own, in pain all the time, passing out, blood tests, scans and a miscarriage on my own. I’m absolutely broken over everything I don’t even feel like my heart can take any more pain. Can people give me their opinions?
this man doesn’t work. I pay for everything with us. He does suffer from mental health but his abuse levels are next level. I just feel lost at the moment.