Loud family?

[nextwed14]

I've never really thought about it before but I 've been told twice lately that we are a very loud family. I have 2 football fans and a child that loves singing and acting. Unusually we don't own a games console of any type- children are just not interested. All 3 children are chatty full of life and rarely spend time in their rooms. One is autistic. I had a friend pop round at the weekend to pick something up and I invited her in for a cuppa but she had to leave after 10 mins because the loudness gave her a headache. one was watching football and getting very into it and another was doing karaoke and other child was chatting away to us. Her kids only live with her part time so she is used to peace and quiet. When they are with her they spend most of the time in tbror rooms. MiL says exactly the same kids are always about and in her face- why can't they be out if they want to be loud. I love them for who they are but maybe they do piss other people off. I love the vibrancy of our house though. It got me thinking- would you class yourself as a loud familysnd is it really annoying to others.

I think that if you have visitors, or family, that are used to a quiet house, for whatever reason, then yes, they would probably find the environment too busy/loud to tolerate for long.

Boisterous kids, full of high energy and enthusiasm, full of chatter and likely speaking loudly because of competition with sibs, or else spending much time on a sports field where you are in with others shouting, yelling, laughing, all loudly, would be a bit much inside for some.

NOT a criticism at all!
I think it's lovely that your kids are self-sufficient in amusing themselves, love to act and sing, and being into sports is a healthy outlet and fun too, as opposed to sitting for hours on their own, out of sight, not interacting with family, and doing who-knows-what.

I think you should be very happy with your kids, so what if others can't stick the noise in your house for long?
Your kids will likely be very close as they get older, and be socially oriented.
The memories they are creating now and the fun atmosphere is healthy and will stand them in good stead going forward.
You enjoy it, OP. I think It's a wonderful thing to see your kids having fun and using their imagination, feeling free to express themselves however they enjoy doing that.

Yes it's annoying!

We're very quiet.
My friend had 4 kids and they were used to being loud to be heard. It used to literally shock me and DD to be around them 😄

It's annoying but only in the way that other people's ways of doing things can be annoying - it doesn't mean anything is being done wrong.

We love next to a loud family. They shout talk. The boy is always shout talking and making up imaginary games and the daughter is always moaning and having hissy fits. The parents both shout talk too. I don’t understand it, but they are friendly enough.

We are fairly quiet I think. My two boys play together constantly and can be fairly loud but any shouting and they are told to keep it down. They have their own room downstairs though so if I had someone for coffee, we’d have peace in the other room. I do find it really annoying when children try and get involved in adult conversation; my two will be polite and will happily chat over dinner or in the pub/a cafe, but they’d rather scratch their own eyes out than sit socialising with me and a friend. On the odd occasion a friend’s child has done this (won’t go away rather than saying hello etc) I’ve found it really irritating

Loud families will always be annoying to people who like peace and quiet.

My NDN-but-one carry out all their conversations at shouting volume, throw their kids out to play at 6am, often stand around on their drive shouting about what errands need doing/what they want to do at the weekend etc., while the kids run around shrieking their heads off. Parents seem oblivious to how they make as much noise as the rest of the street combined.

I live alone and their noise does my absolute head in.

Some people just live life at a different volume level - not much you can do about it (subject to it being a noise nuisance or something).

I grew up in a quiet family. I always wanted my own family to be louder, chaotic, more fun. We are, I think, but maybe not as loud as many. Louder than what I grew up with anyway, which I prefer a thousand times over.

Im loud in my home and i live alone.
It gets even louder when i have people over but we are happy people and always laughing.

There is a difference between being talkative, busy, vivacious and loud. Some people always operate at a louder volume. My kids never shut up and are all talkative confident types but their volume isn't naturally loud, at least I don't think so. When ds is gaming with friends he gets really loud and I am very aware of the contrast. I have a nephew who speaks so loudly it's like a shout and I find being around him very difficult, I wish he'd dial it down a bit. His siblings are chatterboxes but not naturally loud but when he is there everyone raises the volume too and it makes things uncomfortable. I think it is no harm to make louder people especially children aware that others might find it uncomfortable, its possible to learn to lower your tone a little by practice.

Now here's the thing.

Every one of us is entitled to live in the peace of our own home. Every one of us should respect that one, simple standard.

If we happen to be noisy people for whatever reason, we should pre-apologise to those around us, telling them how we will limit eg. our children's time in the garden and are actively teaching them good behaviour and rules around RESPECT FOR OTHERS.

I'm far from perfect but one thing I taught my children was NOT TO SCREAM!! Screaming with over-excitement is just HORRIBLE and unnecessary. I taught mine to reserve screaming for emergencies - and that's when I would drop everything and come running.

You can also model soft-speaking. I made sure we were the quiet family around the supermarket. I abhor those noisy families from hell with loopy children bouncing around the aisles and a belting mumma voice screeching orders. Zero self-awareness. Come on, we've all come across them!

Equally, neighbours should respect you back by making allowances for your children's lively play and chatter.

Please remember your neighbour's entitlement to peace, as she should yours.