British kids going to become more dependent on parental wealth...

[mids2019]

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2024/nov/17/bank-of-mum-and-dad-why-we-all-now-live-in-an-inheritocracy

I think this article is she opening but I think it is a reality we have with rising property prices and the impact of accumulated generational wealth.

Is there going to become an increasing acceptance that the blank of mum an dad will play a big part in children's lives and that ultimately once wealth is accrued within a family of stays there......

I don't think it's eye opening at all, unless you've willingly been keeping your eyes closed all this time.

I'm 34 and the Bank of Mum and Dad has been vital to get ahead as long as I've been an adult. The only kids learning to drive at school had lessons at least part paid by parents. Most of my peers at university were being at least partially funded by parents. Parents made significant contributions to most of their weddings (not all, but several thousand). I don't know anyone who has purchased property without either financial help (direct or through living at home etc) or an inheritance. And I'm not in London, I imagine the situation is even worse there.

It's part of the reason we're only having one child. I don't see a future ahead where parents aren't going to have to fund their children's lives to a large extent if they want them to have the quality of life even we had (nevermind previous generations).

It's very apparent. My sisters kids are going to be 100% better off than mine in the main because she married a man whose parents own two houses in London and who helped them on the property ladder early in their 20s.
My nieces have all their university paid for.

I hardly know anyone in London that hasn’t had help buying! The inheritocracy is already here.

It has been like this forever.
If you have nothing to inherit, don't marry up, then you will be will be totally reliant on your own earning capability.

Some want to do it alone anyway, some have to, some don't care, some want other people's inheritance or savings to be shared round, presumably starting with theirs:)

It's not a level playing field and it's not human nature to be equal or repressed into communism.

Yeah, I think thats very true. Life is extremely difficult without financial help from your parents. I was looking at some very basic houses in the area I grew up, terraced, pokey and starting at 750k. It was quite depressing really, I think I’m going to have to sell some assets to get DD on the housing ladder at some point, unless we can find a decent lump sum out of earnings, they were supposed to be our retirement income but I’d rather see her housed.

I don't have any money to give DS and my mum doesn't have any to give me. "Generational wealth" doesn't exist for a lot of the working class.

I am in my 40'd and almost everyone I know who managed to buy before 35 had help from a relative. We are long past the days where people could buy in an average salary with no support.

I read this article too. Not that the concept of bank of mum and dad is new, but I did think this was worth reading and it made me really think about it.
It's not just about a few thousand towards a wedding, it is the idea that the things we were taught about working hard and doing well are are all notional compared to the bank of mum and dad. As the value of a degree has decreased and the cost of housing has increased, it is more about whose parents can pay for them to get ahead.

It’s kind of always been that way for the toffs though hasn’t it? And now the rest of us are having to operate this way it’s suddenly a big deal…

Depends where you live, you can get a 3 bed in my area for £150k. Certainly doable on an average salary if you can manage to save up enough. Hoping my DS will be able to live at home and save to do this as I'm not a homeowner myself and can't afford to save.

Agree @Beezknees I will inherit nothing and neither will my daughter.

I'm 55 and have been single most of my life and never managed to buy my own house.
I never really expected to, to be honest. I just wish there was more available social housing so that people didn't feel buying was the only option.

💐 I get it.

I'm in rented too and doubt I'll ever be able to buy as I'm a one income household, with rents being the way they are saving is out of the question!

I'll be able to offer DS a roof over his head to save and hopefully he'll be able to get enough together for his own deposit. That's more than I had.

Not sure if I am misunderstanding you, but surely something that used to be a minority issue becoming relevant to 'the rest of us' is pretty much the definition of a big deal?

Mr Monkey and I grew up in London and SE England respectively. We both grew up in low income households with parents who rented. We have done well, got decent jobs and own a flat in London and are satisfied with that. However....

A lot of friends have parents/grandparents who own modest houses but because they are in London /SE they are worth a huge amount.

We are resigned to the fact that as we age a huge wealth gap is going to open up between us and most of our peer group.

@LoquaciousPineapple as the same age as you I had a different experience.
Me and all my friends got jobs at 16 and paid for our own driving lessons at 18/19 when we saved up and had enough for our first car/insurance.
I admit I did get £500 from my parents towards my car but I could have got a car without it.
I was lucky enough to live at home when I done my nurse training and still worked when I was at uni and paid some board and saved some money.
Again when I qualified i saved for my house deposit and moved out when I turned 24.
Our parents couldn't afford to fund us at university or buy cars etc.
They were open with us about what they could/couldn't afford.
So if I decided to do my uni course far away I would have had to top it up myself.
I am not from London or Southern England so that makes a difference also!

Myself and my friends have found that people younger than us aren't getting jobs when they get their NI numbers as a lot of their parents want them to 'focus on their studies'.
A lot of nursing students I come across there is a massive difference from those who have worked at 16 and those who haven't.

I'm currently saving for my 5 year old daughter so I can pay towards her car/wedding or housing deposit. But I will instill she has to work!

The saying that your DC get more expensive as they get older is starting to ring very true. Our DC aren’t ready to buy yet but we will be helping them, once they are ready, it won’t be handed to them on a plate though, we have tried to install good financial values. It’s one of the reasons I haven’t retired yet, we could retire and live fairly comfortably but at the moment I’m continuing to work for my DC future.

It is what it is. I inherited a lot from my parents, as did DH. We are comfortable in our own right so it would be selfish to keep very large sums in the bank and not help the DC with house deposits etc.

As in no one blinked an eyelid if it was the very wealthy aristo types doing this as pretty much standard practice, but now it’s a ‘problem’ because the rest of us have to rely on it. And many don’t have this either.

Has anyone else read the article linked to in the OP?

It's increasingly true because as house price values hit higher and higher multiples of earnings, one inheritance can be worth decades of saving

The shame is it will impact productivity twofold :
-whats the point of working harder if it won't make any noticeable difference to your life because you can't afford to buy
-.whats the point in working hard if you have already inherited vast amounts

It may feel like a "so what" problem to the people doing well in this set up, but it really isn't because it affects our whole economy

The “bank of mum and dad” is all very well if there is a bank. In ordinary working class families like ours, there just isn’t.

DD and her fiancé are living with us while they save for a deposit. They’re doing well but with a nice little house starting at around £250k where we live and they work, they’ve got at least another 18 months to go while also saving for a tiny wedding. We’re helping with the wedding but we can’t do both, and her fiancé’s parents rent their house and aren’t in a financial position to help either.

None of us are professionals; DD is in admin, DH, FSIL and his dad work in a factory and his mum is in retail, so everyone is on a low wage and there just isn’t the money to bankroll them.

It is because house prices are too high relative to people’s income. It causes so many problems. It is also one of the main reasons the government has to prop up people’s incomes.

well I have bad news for my kids 🤪

seriously though, I think to a point this has always been the case. Even in my and my husbands relatively poor families. They each gave £1000 towards our wedding. And we have had lots of bit over the years , although to be fair they often relate to the kids (ie they have had their school shoes bought or a school trip sort of thing)

I know when we were kids you were expected to be working and paying board / self sufficient at 18 , younger if you went straight to work at 16 .

my eldest is likely to be at home until 20 ( absolutely fine so long as she is studying) she would need about 12k deposit to get a terrace house near us .

she earns about £300 a month at her weekend job atm , and I am expecting her to buy her own driving lessons (with the exception of her provisional license that we have got her as part of her Christmas gift)

im more then happy for her to have another ‘free’ year at home as an adult if it gives her the opportunity to buy a house a year later, which I know my mum wouldn’t have done.

My 19 year old ds is paying for his driving lessons himself plus saves well from his full time income.

He will therefore be buying his own car.

It is no good him looking at me although I have no mortgage at least.

We are both going to start doing bitcoin plus he speaks of buying a cheap house here in the midlands as a rental in a couple of years.

So although he lives at home still and he pays a monthly contribution I don't finance him other than not charging a rent. As I have no rent. So I guess that helps.

I am interested to see how this affects mobility within the UK

A lot of my younger colleagues have considered or done moves to places like Leeds, Sheffield, Glasgow from London/SE

And if I was 20 years younger, I might well have done the same