4 years ago SIL withdrew from everyone saying she had an illness that makes her smell. No one has ever smelt her. Since then she spends most of her time in the house and if anyone goes over she hides away in her room- including eating her xmas dinner alone. She lives with FIL.
In this time MIL died and she is clearly struggling with grief and only ever leaves the house to visit the grave.
There are 3 brothers all with partners and children. She will see one BIL consistently and his DC. The other BIL is less consistent as is DH and she also refuses to see our DC saying DS told her she smelt of coins when he was 6.
Earlier this week she sent DH a barrage of abuse saying no one cares about her and she wants to kill herself. However, FIL refuses to let anyone 'challenge' her as he says that it will cause her to have a nervous breakdown. He says when she is physically sorted then she can get mental health help to reintegrate into society. He also told me she threw something at him and refused to talk to him for days. He struggled with his own grief and says the situation with SIL is a black cloud over him yet refuses to push her to get help.
She has now told DH she wants to die but she won't do anything as she needs to take care of FIL.
I feel that she uses this illness to hide behind and the brothers are now saying wait and see what the antibiotics she was on have done. I think something needs to be done and she needs help - but what can I do? Any advice would be very welcome.