health anxiety by proxy- it is taking over my life

[Puzzle12338]

sorry this may be a long post

i have been a very anxious person with regards to 'health' for many years

i think it was triggered many years ago when i had cysts o my ovaries and was sent for cancer blood test (all was fine)

i then spent many yeas having health anxiety about myself, i diagnoised myself with many many illnesses over a few years. spent all day on google and worrying

i found stopping the pill helped and i was ok for a few years

had 2 children, was slightly anxious but nothing to major, but would panic when they were ill

in the summer it was triggered again, my husband was suffering headache, went docs for them to tell him he needed a brain scan!!! this obviously sent my into the hole of anxiety again, convinced myself her had a brain tumor, i sat up the hopsital crying with him. All was thankfully ok and i was ok again

but then my mum had some symptoms and was sent on a 2 week pathway, this gain triggered me and i spent all day everyday on google, convincing myself she had some serious illness (all was okay after scans etc)

but then, 2 weeks ago my daughter (2) complained of a 'sore head' i didnt think much of it, but that night she woke up with a sore head. Was find the next day, but got a little sick in the evening and complained of a sore head again, of course google has told me its a brain tumor. She has been fine since, but I am making it worse by constantly asking her if she has a sore head

she gets a sore tummy due to constipation, which i can cope with but for the last 2 weeks I have been on edge, watching her every move. Making sure shes talking on, etc

sitting waiting for a phone call while she's at nursey, looking at pics all day to see if her face looks normal!!!

i am constantly on google, looking at symptoms. its taking over my life

last night when she went to bed, she said her tummy hurt, then she said her head hurt, then she said her elbow hurt!! so this has now triggered me again, i am such a wreck that she has seriously something wrong with here, even thought there is not much logical reason for it.

I also now have in my head, if i do not do things in a certian way, something terible will happen!

I am please looking for advice/ reassurance that this is all in my head?!
I've booked an appointment with docs, but im tempted to cancel as i don't think they will take me seriously

Don't cancel your GP appointment, medication can help with health anxiety. It's clearly impacting on your ability to relax and enjoy the now with your family. I say this as someone who has a little one with a brain tumour. I live every day in the now as much as I am able because there is no point in worrying about what will be. We have no control of that. My practical suggestion (along with asking your GP for meds) is to keep a headache diary for your child, and then you can show it to your GP if you remain concerned. Familiarise yourself with the urgent signs of a brain tumour in children, and then get on with your life. It's too short and too precious.

@banabak

thank you for your reply it's appreciated

I am so sorry to hear about your child.

Sorry, but can i be really rude and ask what symptoms of their's concerned you? I know this probably won't help me, but I just need to know what to look for to be honest.

I think I may keep the appointment, my husband is insisting i go. I've tried speaking to him and he wants to help, but he just dont get it

Have a look at the brain tumour charity website, they're listed there. Part of my living in the now is not reliving the past. Good luck with your GP appointment.

@banabak i appreciate you reply. thank you