Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

TW uncle been accused of historic abuse

40 replies

hellohellooo · 14/11/2024 13:41

Can someone please tell me if they know what may happen next

He was ten my other uncle was 8 and it has come out that my older uncle did some inappropriate things to him

Full context when they were younger a priest abused them both in the house during a prayer service

This came out last year
Now back in Oct my younger uncle has spoke to others about what happened

Can he go to jail?
He has 5 kids
His wife is very worried now

OP posts:
Original poster
hellohellooo · 09/05/2025 16:06

Sorry that some of it did not make sense

Priest since passed away
Turns out there were multiple victims

OP posts:
InALonelyWorld · 09/05/2025 16:12

hellohellooo · 09/05/2025 15:56

@InALonelyWorld yes that is exactly how it happened

I'm just really trying to get my head around it

The younger uncle asked to meet up
Made a recording
My older uncle met and said he was sorry for what has happened and that they need to make amends

This was sent to police and older uncle invited I.ln for police recorded interview

He is out of his mind with worry

They were both under ten when the evil priest abused them

Both need therapy and my older uncle has taken this so badly
Now he is drinking quite a bit

I just guess I'm wondering what the court process entails? Etc

Given the age and circumstances, it might not go to court. Lately a lot more awareness seems to be happening for sibling abuse after CSA. However I'm not entirely sure what will happen for definite now the fact that the police seem to have this audio confession. I don't think anyone can really say.

For a start it is likely that both uncles will be interviewed, one likely under voluntary caution, they will gather the evidence, statements etc and refer to the CPS to decide if it will go to court or not. If it does go to court then its obviously going to be a 50/50 chance on outcome. I would advise, regardless of if it gets to that stage or not, that your uncle seeks a legal representative, ideally not a duty one. And perhaps some counselling.

GildedRage · 09/05/2025 16:13

@hellohellooo what is your involvement? Have you suffered abuse?
Your brothers are going through a challenging period. I suspect the younger more so than the older.
You should seek professional help via phone services locally as to how you should navigate this.
Do you want to “pick sides”?
Both brothers deserve kindness, respect and privacy.
Personally I’d not listen to “taped” confessionals.

Original poster
hellohellooo · 09/05/2025 16:14

Thank you so much

I am not really involved with them right now as they have stayed away from family events but other members of the family are extremely worried

OP posts:
Original poster
hellohellooo · 09/05/2025 16:15

No picking sides at all

How could I?

It's just we have no clue what the process is and it has largely been hush hush

I do want to get some counselling too

OP posts:
GildedRage · 09/05/2025 16:20

I suspect a fair amount of investigation will be information gathering in case the group of abused should proceed legally against the larger church organization.

theonlyonestillawake · 09/05/2025 16:22

If the older uncle had not had his 10th birthday when the abuse happened then I don't think he will be prosecuted because the age of criminal responsibility is 10 years old.

However it is an awful situation and it sounds like both brothers, but particularly the younger, need some extensive therapy.

murasaki · 09/05/2025 16:25

I don't think the younger one has to 'make amends' at all. That is manipulative on behalf of the elder one. Saying that, I feel sorry for the older one too, if to a slightly lesser extent, and agree that this maybe being used as an attempt to go after the church and who knew what, which needs to be done.

InALonelyWorld · 09/05/2025 16:36

This website link was shared on a recent thread about sibling abuse https://www.lucyfaithfull.org.uk/. Thought it might be helpful here so you have somewhere to look for tailored support.

Lucy Faithfull Foundation - Preventing child sexual abuse

Lucy Faithfull Foundation works to protect children by working with people who pose a risk and diverting them from causing harm.

https://www.lucyfaithfull.org.uk/

Original poster
hellohellooo · 09/05/2025 17:00

I just don't know any more

OP posts:
Original poster
hellohellooo · 09/05/2025 17:05

InALonelyWorld · 09/05/2025 16:36

This website link was shared on a recent thread about sibling abuse https://www.lucyfaithfull.org.uk/. Thought it might be helpful here so you have somewhere to look for tailored support.

Super helpful will take a look now

OP posts:
Mumofteenandtween · 09/05/2025 17:25

Assuming that you are in England or Wales then the before / after 10th birthday is very very important as the age of criminal responsibility there is 10. If he is U10 then there is definitely no crime. If over 10 then lots of factors come into play but the fact that he was so young and had been abused himself makes it unlikely to be in the public interest to prosecute.

If in Scotland then age of criminal responsibility is 12 so he will be under it.

Original poster
hellohellooo · 09/05/2025 17:50

Mumofteenandtween · 09/05/2025 17:25

Assuming that you are in England or Wales then the before / after 10th birthday is very very important as the age of criminal responsibility there is 10. If he is U10 then there is definitely no crime. If over 10 then lots of factors come into play but the fact that he was so young and had been abused himself makes it unlikely to be in the public interest to prosecute.

If in Scotland then age of criminal responsibility is 12 so he will be under it.

Thank you

That is really clear

OP posts:
flyoverstate · 09/05/2025 18:45

To circle back to the nervous teen, they won’t be interviewed with a family member present. They could have additional independent support if they are identified as needing this. But the purpose of the conversation is have due diligence and check that the childhood abuse was limited to the perpetrators childhood and not something that has continued. It will not be a very formal meeting if there is no disclosure of current abuse. That would occur if the child disclosed abuse when asked.

Original poster
hellohellooo · 09/05/2025 22:56

Thank you all so much

I am not taking sides

I'm trying to get some clarity in my own head and was too embarrassed to ask friends

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread