FIL moving in help me on things I need to consider

[RevelryMum]

So my lovely MIL passed unexpected recently and my poor FIL will please god move in with my DP, DD and myself as he can't be on his own for varies reasons . He is such a lovely man quiet, easy to talk to and just a beautiful soul my heart is broken for him it's very hard to witness his grief and his loss of independence all at once.

We will have to make some adjustments to our house like changing the downstairs loo into a wet room for him and making sure it's as safe as possible regarding falls.

I know it will be extremely difficult for him but he isn't one to complain and I know he would never say if he was unhappy with anything. He has said he would rather live with us over his other LO's so it's completely his choice.

So I suppose to try make him as comfortable and happy as he can be given the circumstances what else do I need to consider for him so you think?

I definitely think an armchair in his room and one in our living room as that's most comfortable for him and a tv in his room so he has his own space he very much likes his own company. He isnt very mobile so he will be in the house almost all of the time and I'm just worried he wont feel it's his home which i know its not but i really want him to feel comfortable here.

Yes really good point I never thought of that !

Of he needs support, make sure he's getting Attendance Allowance. It will enable him to get some extra support or contribute to any adaptations he may need.

If his mobility is not good, get his feet checked if he'll allow it. They tend to get neglected and a monthly check from an at home foot care nurse may be beneficial. Use the AA to pay for it (roughly £35 a visit).

If he's agreeable, make sure DP is registered at the GP as his carer if he doesn't have PoA. It will mean he can talk to GP on his father's behalf.

You can also request an assessment to see what adaptations maybe required. Dependent on where you are, this is either via the GP or Local Authority.

Check if the GP has a social prescriber, they can help with all sorts of things, as well as signpost services. Your FiL may be eligible for a Blue Badge, they can help with the application. There's a lot if help available, it's just tracking it all down. Pop over to the Elderly Parents board on here. Lots of people in the same boat.

The main thing is patience and kindness, you sound as if you have plenty. 💐

Very similar situation here. You maybe lucky. A family member was given 3 months to live almost 3 years ago. Slowing down now but still out and about