My dh just phoned from hospital - bladder cancer diagnosis

[scared1a]

Hi,

I've just had a short conversation with dh who was newly diagnosed with bladder cancer.
I'm so scared for him.
He's 46. We have a young child. He works a physical job.
He said he'll tell me more when he comes home in a bit, but I'm just so anxious.

Has anyone had experience with this? I've read through the NHS page but still not sure what to expect.

My father had this three years ago, just before turning 90. Surgery dealt with most of the tumour, and then chemo & radiotherapy to clear up the remnants of the blighter. He is still going strong, and hasn't had to have a catheter or anything like that. Your DH needs to eat well, and prepare for surgery; if there's also radiotherapy, he will need a lot of support. But it's not a death sentence - it's very treatable.

It’s a massive shock op but hold onto the fact that it is really one of the more treatable ones. I was so stressed when my grandpa was diagnosed in his 70s, he died of old age in his mid 90s.

Thanks everybody.

It sounds like we will be waiting around not able to do much for a while.
He said they'll call him for another scan - endoscopy- in the next 2-4 weeks. Operation waiting list is around 5 months. He didn't say what stage but apparently it is quite 'developed'.
He had issues for over a year on and off and sent home with antibiotics for uti.

OP my dad also had to wait bloody ages for his op. From memory he was told it moves slowly so there was no massive rush.

Feel for you, my dh is also 46.
While 5 months sounds like ages, it might be because its not at all urgent? I do hope that's the case.
Fingers crossed for some better clarity soon. This must be the worst part of all, knowing you have cancer but not yet having a plan in place.

My dads had cancer of the bladder, years ago, he’s now nearly 82.
They removed the cancerous growth and he still has a camera inserted into his bladder once a year now, used to be more frequently, just to check everything is has it should be

This is just an anecdote but I know two people-both older than your husband-who were diagnosed with this. They underwent treatment and it wasn't always pleasant but it was successful.

Right now, one of them is on a golfing holiday in Spain and the other is getting ready to play the piano for an amateur pantomime.

So, I just want to say that it doesn't mean the worst is going to happen and I hope that is true for you too,

so Sorry to hear. My DH had it and was lucky it was caught early and make a full and quick recovery no chemo needed. A few years on, regular checks and still okay. I hope he has a similar quick fix! It is bloody scarey though!!

Hi OP, I didn't want to read and run.

I'm sorry to hear that and sending you lots of positive energy. Quite a few posts about how this is curable and I hope the same for your DH too. Do reach out and talk to a charity or something like that so you have the right support as well, x

Sorry to hear this! Sending you lots of love and best wishes.
My dad had the same dx two years ago - I believe his was stage 2 with some grade 3 cells. He had surgery to remove the cancer which was then sent to the lab for analysis. I think he was gotten in for a CT scan very soon after initial dx and we didn’t have to wait too long for the surgery. He then had to have BCG treatment due to the grade 3 cells. His one year check up was clear. He hasn’t had one recently due to other health problems but as far as we know all is fine on that front xx

So sorry to read your message OP. I remember that shock well. My husband was diagnosed with bladder cancer when he was 35.

He is now 6 years all clear. He had surgery and then regular checks. He’s on yearly checks now.

It’s so scary. But know that it can all be ok. I don’t know where you are in the country, but I highly recommend the Royal Marsden. They have always given my husband (and still are) the best care.

Absolutely. My aunt was diagnosed many years ago and is still going in her 80s x

Try and stay off internet sites if you can.

He is going to be able to give you all the information about his diagnosis and treatment plan when he gets home.

That is going to be the most relevant information for you all and you can talk about it together.

He is likely to have been given some information about support groups/sites - Action bladder cancer Uk is one: https://actionbladdercanceruk.org/find-your-nearest-support-group/

I am sorry. I'm sure it is a shock, but the way ahead will become clear after a treatment plan
Bladder cancer is very treatable and a relative had this, older than your DH
This was a few years ago, he had chemo then the growths removed. They were embedded in the bladder wall
Ten years later and he is fit and well with yearly cystoscopy
Wishing your DH well, and you of course

A much loved family member of mine had bladder cancer, and treatment for it. Had the all clear after.

Wishing you both lots of luck and strength.

I’m so sorry OP, a cancer diagnosis is a massive shock. It’ll take a while to process and while it’s tempting to Google, I would stick to the information on the Cancer Research and Macmillan websites.

Like others have said, bladder cancer is often treatable and I hope that’s the case for your DH. His age also works in his favour. The specific type of cancer and whether it has spread will be important, so I hope you get some more news soon. In the meantime, be kind to yourselves and keep posting here if the support is helpful x

What a shock, OP. Sending you best wishes.

In addition to the charity already mentioned, there's also www.fightbladdercancer.co.uk

I'm not sure why there are two, or how they differ, but this was the one I came across when DF was diagnosed.

Sorry to hear this.

A grandparent of mine was diagnosed with bladder cancer and lived with it for many many years, dying of old age in their 90s.

Hi @scared1a

My fiance was diagnosed with and treated for bladder cancer when he was 28 and I was 26. This was 6 years ago.

He had surgery to get the tumour out, then a chemotherapy treatment.

He has to go back every 6 months for checkups and to scrape any regrowth but he hasn't had any regrowth at all since the initial op and chemo treatment.

Cannot recommend enough reaching out to Maggie's cancer charity. They got us both through what was an extremely dark time in our lives.

Love and strength to you and always here if you want to chat or ask questions. X

My partner was diagnosed 3 years' ago. His was an aggressive type but it was still on the bladder wall. It was removed and he had 6 sessions of immunotherapy and then maintenance sessions. It was painful and disruptive but bearable.

It reoccured after this treatment and it was recommended his bladder should be removed. He really didn't want this and is now on his second set of immunotherapy and is clear. This is all on the proviso that if it reoccurs he will have his bladder removed.

I am sure everyone will tell you that it is a very contained form of cancer and can be treated with very good outcomes.

It was been very disruptive and not easy but he/we have survived. Best of luck and good wishes.

My FIL was diagnosed with bladder cancer almost a year ago at the age of 81. He was told it was one of the better cancers to get - excellent recovery rates and generally they tend to respond well to treatment.

He had treatment - started in Jan this year. He was very cagey about the details but I know it was immunotherapy. He felt unwell tye day or so after treatments but otherwise seemed to be OK.

Latest update is he is in remission. He's back to normal, no further treatments.

I am so, so sorry you've had this news. It can be scary and upsetting and upturns lots of feelings. I hope all goes well for your DH.

I'm sorry to hear this Op, this must be very scary, sending a hand hold.

If it helps, my grandmother was diagnosed with bladder cancer in 1999. She had surgery to remove the bladder and had a stoma fitted. She is going to turn 100 next year and only just went into a nursing home last year. She has lived a completely normal life since the op and lived independently until the care home.

Although every prognosis is different, it might not be the worst case scenario that you immediately, and naturally, jump to.

Make sure you get as much info about the diagnosis and prognosis as you can and research/reach out to some of the cancer charities for advice and support.

Yes my dad had advanced bladder cancer and it was during covid so everything was delayed/a complete utter shit show with referrals etc.
We were told bladder cancer is usually well contained within the bladder as it's so thick, he eventually had his bladder removed and was fine with a bag and no further issues with that.
Died of something completely unrelated two years later unfortunately.

shellyleppard · Today 10:53

So sorry to hear this news. However if they catch it early enough there is a very good success rate.

It's my understanding that it's got a very good success rate. My uncle had it 2 years ago and he left it until he collapsed, after passing blood for weeks. The did and operation and some sessions of chemotherapy and he's now doing very well and free of it.

My grandmother had it, she did need surgery to remove her bladder and radiotherapy but it did cure it. Can't tell you that was easy, it's life changing but it's also life saving.

It's worth investigating if he can get treatment quicker at a different hospital, waiting lists do vary