Where do I start? Morbidly obese ADHD Help?!

[HydrangeaBush]

Hello,

I'm 21 stone. I think. I'm truly floundering at approaches to lose the weight and feel stuck. I'm also struggling a bit in my work and trying to change direction to something less overwhelming and failing.

I'm also due an ADHD and autism assessment in the new year.

I feel for so many years my life has been truly floundering and each year I try to address it it gets worse.

The mobrid obesity is affecting my mobility now.

We are low income but I was wondering whether it was worth stretching to get
weight loss injections as it would potentially be life changing.

But if they want to prescribe with adhd meds that's going to overlap isn't it.

And my GP just told me to eat less and if I just ate 2, chocolate bars a day I'd lose weight as it was calories in/calories out.

I feel like I want help to gain muscle too and obviously I'll have lots of excess skin.

My whole life is a mess and I don't know who to go to for help. It feels like the adhd dr in Jan can talk to me about adhd. I could go to Asda for mountjuuro and they can talk about that.

But I don't trust my own decision making skills and I have no idea.

I'm scared of spending money we don't have (at a time the kids will need driving lessons etc) just to pile it all back on again too.

I did tier 2 with the local NHS but it wasn't great. Just a chat about trying to eat more veg.

But I feel it's an overall thing I'm struggling with (time/energy to cook and eat well. Executive function to plan meals etc)

Honestly I'm struggling and don't quite know who to go to for help.

Wellbutrin is an antidepressant and anecdotally I’ve heard it’s pretty good for adhd. I don’t know what it’s called in the UK but presumably your doctor can prescribe it without you having to jump through a bunch of hoops, if so it might be a stop gap if you feel you’re really struggling

I was on antidepressentants/anti anxiety and came off a year ago. Ironically it was mirtazapine which meant I gained even more weight.

I think rather than antidepressants it's more that due to likely neurodiversity I struggle to weigh up options or make a clear path forwards. I definitely feel burnt out though.

I think losing weight and probably adhd meds would help.

Until now I've been really anti any type of non essential medication but I'm morbidly obese and struggling.

I think you need some sort of professional adhd coach.

Re meal plans. Who else lives in your household? Who does the shopping planning and cooking? Because I know that struggling to put a meal together is an adhd thing. Would it be worth some sort of subscription service where you get sent everything you need and don't need to plan?

Can you buy a recipe book on budget family meals and just do one recipe a day, so you don't need to think about your meals you just follow a book?
Any chance to move is good, are there any ways you can include extra movement in your day?
Try to make it achievable but positive like dusting while watching TV in evening.

i am in adhs group on facebook and a lot of people saying that they loose weigh once they start their ADHD medication. I just had to come off munjaro as it was causing awful migraines for me but initially it was very good. I think if you are close to getting assessment its worth waiting as they will then start titration and you wouldn't want to battle to with side effects of both. You can then add munjaro later on? In the best case scenario you wont even need them as Adhd meds would help?

Have a look at your finances closely and see if you can stretch to the injections. Anecdotally Mounjaro has helped my head feel so much clearer which has been great for my ADHD. And you may find most of the cost is offset by reduced food bills.

I was 21st in July and I’m now 15 and a half. Loose skin is minimal too.

I'm just not sure at 21 stone that the small tweaks like a new recipe each week etc will make much difference. I did lose a stone coming off mirtazapine but I put more than that on.

I just wish I could go to someone with an overall view (like a gp technically does) that could help with advice.

Meal planning - the main issue is both my kids are autistic and one has adhd. Both eat very differently.

One is vegetarian and tbf would love freshly prepped real veg Instagram friendly meals every day. I can't do this. I am exhausted and often it's easy food (pasta/sauce, breaded fish and wedges, etc). I would be happy for us to eat like this.

Other child is standard beige food autistic (and putting on weight with it :()
She doesn't like food touching, unfamiliar food, mixed food etc. Would actually love a meat and 2 (plain) veg type meals my mum used to eat.

Husband eats anything.

I struggle with fatigue and a job that's not right for me so by 4pm I have no energy to do any thing. I hope losing weight and eating better might help but it's cyclical isn't it. I'm not wired right...

There are various meal plans online, including some where you add the ingredients to your shopping list. Those help a lot. You can do one or two weeks of one plan, then choose a different one if you like. That way you don’t have to plan. Keep breakfast and lunch the same, and it’s a lot easier.

I find online food shopping best as I don’t get distracted so easily or buy crap.

Just seen your update. For veggie and autism, try to cook double/triple quantities and freeze them so you have appropriate meals ready for them. Don’t turn yourself into a restaurant. Keep the changes simple.

WOW Princess!!! That's incredible. How have you found it? I've been googling stories but most I find are just a few pounds or stone overweight or some American extreme ones. You're the same as me!!!! I'd love to be 15stone.

Please tell me more (if you don't mind).

Are you on adhd meds?

Have you had to go up high doses?
Will you maintain it?
Have you seen a GP about it?
Have you changed what you eat?
Can you move more easily now (if that was a problem. It is for me)

I can't believe you lost it that fast. Is it because we're starting at a higher weight?

Sorry to pounce on you but it's a complete lack of friends at this weight to ask.

Wow.

Hello, I have adhd and like you struggle with meal planning/exhaustion/burnout. Impulse eating is a big thing for me. I absolutely hate health professionals telling me to eat more veg (yes, obviously that is correct but my lack of knowledge isn't the issue).

What has worked for me was Wegovy and adhd meds combined (I take Lisdexamphetamine/Elvanse). Really calms the obsessions down.

I hadn't been on my adhd meds for a few months when I started taking Wegovy (just wanted a break from them) and I thought it wasn't working even though I was at the maximum dose. I went back on my adhd meds and then something clicked. Lisdexamphetamine is licensed in the USA for binge eating so if possible it's a good one to try.

So 🤞🏻for your assessment and if you can it is probably worth trying the injections.

I kind of think at 21 stone little will work as I've already gone past that point of super oversight. I feel so broken.

We really don't have any spare money though but ultimately I want not to be fat sedentary mum and to live long enough to see them get bigger and get back to walking with them too.

I know this will sound ridiculous, but my GP said that Slimming World is the only dirt plan she sees work for patients - sustained weight loss.
Do you have to prioritise your kid's driving lessons over your health? I have not paid for driving lessons for my kids, they will have to sort this out themselves, as I had to as my Mum could not afford it.
Good luck, I really hope you find a way through.

Thankyou. I don't know which to start first.

I don't want the adhd assessment to think I just want the drugs to lose weight ight (although it's a factor I just want to be to function) but I don't know who to ask about interactions etc or whether to start weight loss drugs first and ask for adhd meds that go with that.

I genuinely feel bad spending this on myself when I could be helping my kids. They're both aware we have less money than those around them (well off school area).

Also I don't want to "waste"the money if it all piles back in afterwards or if we can't afford it anymore.

I'm terrified of an actual operation so thought this might be an option. But it's still optional rather than the NHS recommending it isn't it. My mind is all over the place.

Hello 👋 I’m Autistic/ADHD. Being overweight is really common in ADHDers. We tend to struggle to recognise hunger signals as well as feeling full. Difficulty planning and processing results in quick and easy food.
I was diagnosed with ADHD 2 years ago. I started on Elvanse (lisdexamfetamine). It massively suppressed my appetite and along with going to the gym, I lost about 2 stone. This has plateaued since but I’ve not gained much. Being on meds has helped me to plan ahead better and I’m eating better as a result. I get that it’s difficult with a fussy eater (I have one) but batch cooking and planning ahead are your friends. I did move jobs to different (set) hours which helped massively. However I have checked and people can take Mounjaro on ADHD meds.
Assuming you are in the UK? There’s a really supportive Facebook group Here for women with ADHD, many waiting for assessment or realising they might have it. You may find it helpful.

Partner was 15 stone and 5”7 when he started. He’s tried Wegovy then moved Mounjaro as it was cheaper. We’re actually saving money with him on it as our food bills were enormous. It’s been great for all of us as he used to constantly talk about food and it really got me down how much it affected the kids.

Are you seeing an actual ADHD Dr in Jan with the chance of getting medication? If so I would wait for that and see its impact. I'm quite sure I have ADHD and have struggled with meal planning all my life, it doesn't matter what advise I'm given (and I'm very bright) I just can't practically implement it (I'm with gusto now as it's all in a box for me- but that's also a costly option)

If you're just seeing a GP in Jan with the hope for a referral then I would get mounjaro (not at Asda though, that's where I go and it's one of the more expensive ones. My local pharmacy do it £35 cheaper, I just don't have the executive functioning skills to change it) For me it's the only thing that could have worked for weight loss, I've been trying for 30 years. I think unless you're obese you cannot understand what it's like. I've spent my whole life looking at people on the street and not understanding HOW they can be slim, i genuinely believed everyone must be miserable because they were constantly denying themselves that urge to eat. Well, turns out that's not true. Non-obese people don't have that urge like we do. And mounjaro switched it off for me.

Ps. I say this as a sweeping generalisation and it may be that your kids can't, but if they're old enough to drive, they're old enough for a part time job to fund that. Not every kid has to drive as soon as they're old enough. Think of the money as in investment in them having you around for longer. Morbid obesity (I was just under with a BMI of 39) has so many health risks.

It's good that you are taking steps towards making changes, just remember good habits take time and don't beat yourself up when things don't go to plan.

I would start to look at ADHD and Autism resources before your assessment. You could follow the dietary advice today; a good balanced diet with plenty of vegetables. If you choose to take ADHD medication, some people find protein helps to extend the action of ADHD meds. The medication can also affect your appetite and you may actually find you need to remember to eat.

That said, planning is going to your friend even if it something you struggle with. Again meds can help, but you still need to focus your focused time on realistic habits that you can achieve everyday. Daily exercise, even just a walk, is really important. Plan your meals and don't snack. Eat at least 2 types of vegetable with your lunch and tea. Write a weekly meal plan and do your shopping list at the same time. Avoid artificial sweeteners and low sugar options and limit your consumption of real sugar.

Ah see the planning is my issue.
Or rather right now while I'm in the zone I could plan brilliantly.... And then not follow through. Or be exhausted in a week and not want to plan so go for whatever food is nearby.

I think it's the adhd/executive function issues combined with fatigue that sabotage all the "sensible weight loss advice" as it's not that I don't know it.

If I could do "realistic habits" and stop snacking I wouldn't be looking for adhd medication (bigger issue than just food it's cleaning my house, focusing on work etc)

-yes I did NHS Right to Choose with autism and adhd and the waitng list was about 3 months at the time so it should be January. I think it will be obvious I have adhd and autism tbh. It's taken several years of wondering then seeing the Dr... But after my girls getting diagnosed it's really obvious.

-driving lessons. Girls are 15 and 11 but it's an example of things we ought to be saving for and can't as we can't save currently. Not having a job that suits my education may also be a ND thing but I've no idea how to increase earnings despite looking every week. I think I need to retrain.

@HydrangeaBush

I genuinely feel bad spending this on myself when I could be helping my kids

Getting yourself healthier, fitter and almost certainly extending your life expectancy WILL help your kids.

I started Mounjaro and was amazed at the focus it has given me, tbh I'm more worried about the ADHD impact of coming off it than I am about potential weight gain.

I don't take ADHD meds because my blood pressure was too high, a problem many overweight people have

Dripping yes I was hoping to try and get my blood pressure down in the next 2months.

I feel I'm a hit chicken and egg as to what to do first.

Do you think mounjara had helped the adhd then?

I guess my adhd meds would be £10 a month which is cheaper than mounjuro.

I wish I could talk to someone qualified 😬

I've also wondered about hrt!!

If I make a gp appointment and talk about adhd hrt and wlmeds I'm not sure how well that will come across.

Happy to answer questions!

No ADHD meds, my practice won’t prescribe them to new diagnoses during the shortage but I’m not entirely convinced I’ll need them.

I went up to 5mg after the first month then 7.5mg but then only went up in smaller increments so I’ve only just started 10mg. I think I’ll stay on this for a month, then do an incremental step up to 12.5mg, and do the same for two months up to 15mg. I’m hoping I’ll be at goal by the end of that.

I’ve had to really change my thought processes with food and it is going to be a battle to maintain but I have a plan to make it happen and stick with it. I’ll weigh daily, and probably stay in a maintenance dose for a year at least whilst my body adapts.

Everything is so much easier, things I hadn’t even realised had gotten difficult! Movement, breathing, just existing is so much more comfortable. I’ve stopped snoring and I’m sleeping better. I’ve gone from a size 24 to a 16/18.

I haven’t seen a GP about it as I’ve found they aren’t all that clued up.

Wow that sounds amazing. Who did you go with and did you follow anything in particular or a thread on here or just googling? I feel I'm very not very clued up and am aware my gp doesn't understand weight issues.

Another vote for Mounjaro. My sister is a similar size and ADHD profile and has lost 50lbs since July. You will spent much less money on food because you aren't so impulsive and won't eat as much. I'm on it too and am making much healthier food for the family like soups and simple stir fry with just veggies and noodles cause I don't care about high fat and salt 'tasty' food any more. I am saving a lot.