i agree that they have been called out as their behaviour was unlawful, but I don’t think - otherwise their exploits would have been affirmed. Perhaps 10 years ago, but not in 2024.
I do think there has been a significant shift in the last decade as a result of #metoo. The Irish rugby players who were not convicted of rape, but had their WhatsApp messages exposed. They lost their jobs, and were heavily, heavily criticised.
After this I am going to look up this situation with the Irish Rugby Players, I must of missed that controversy. I'll take your word for it though, regarding the general response. Perhaps the shift since MeToo has been greater than I realised, but I still think it has a way to go and there still isn't yet quite equal parity in society regarding the judgement women receive vs men for 'bad' sexual behaviour. But I get your point.
I fully disagree that her choices are empowering to women.
I think they're empowering to women in a very specific sense of showing that women should be able to make uncomfortable choices sexually, without being either verbally abused or labelled as victims and exposing double standards. Mostly in that sense.
I think the trauma for a woman of having lived such a lifestyle comes in large part because of how society frames, weighs and judges women for their sexual behaviour and their experiences vs men. If you find that a consequence of a career as a porn star/prostitute results in being seen as of lesser human value, are forever deemed a slut, whore etc and have to distance yourself from your work by killing your work alter-ego completely and living abroad/anonymously and are a social outcast.. you're going to be mentally ill and have deep regret. A woman who says 'well I've used my agency to do this, why are you judging me' it raises important questions about why women earn special disfavour for not being 'good girls' and if that is fair. So if it results in us rethinking why we take that stance and how we think about womanhood, I think, yes, that is powerful. I also think it's strong to a degree, to take a stance like that boldly. Are her actions good for society and/or actually reflective of society? That is a different question.
Because I believe the motive is to attract male followers and to present herself in a way that pleases men.
Compare to say : Samantha from Sex in the City : who had a high sex drive, but I don’t think you’d see that character on male orientated social media, making money from men, wearing very little to please men, and then videoing herself performing sex acts for those men.
In terms of her work, to be fair, her client base is men and that's how she earns her money. So yes, she needs and is motivated to please them. If she were into lesbian porn, perhaps her demographic would be composed of more women and she would strive to please them. So I don't see that as necessarily being anything other than business. When you have a job that relies on internet exposure and social media it can become work everyday even you're away from the camera. You have to be this thing you've presented yourself as 24/7
But where she is saying 'none of this is about men I just got off on it' you make a really good point with your Samantha Character example. Why does it need to be recorded? Enjoy sex if you want. Why broadcast it? It is still, obviously, ultimately about pleasing her client base. Unless she genuinely enjoys voyeurism. Is she just about the money, or about a desperate need to have constant male attention or both? A good question for Lilly might be would you be happy for your daughter to follow your footsteps.
But I don't know. She appears to come from a very settled background.
That said, I remember an interview with Linda Lusardi ex page 3 girl, in which she said something like: when the papers were published following her first page 3 shoot, her father went out and bought a load of newspapers because he was so proud of her. And it does seem that Lilly has parental support also, so one wonders what the dynamic at home is in terms of sexual attitudes. But again I'm catching myself inferring there is something wrong with women wanting to work in sex affiliated industries.