Ridiculous worry they’ll swap my baby

[QuietlyStorming]

I’m 23 ½ weeks pregnant and fully aware my hormones might be a bit wild right now, but I’m struggling to shake the thought all day.

I saw a headline this morning about two babies being swapped at birth and only finding out years later after a DNA test. I didn’t even read the details in the article because it suddenly triggered the worry.

With our first I had a c-section and DP stayed with her right from delivery until I was closed up and joined them both, she never left our sight.

But this time our baby will likely be early (another c-sec), and there’s a chance she might need NICU time without us. What if, even accidentally, there’s a mix-up? I know it’s not logical, that mix-ups are rare, and hospitals have procedures, but it’s niggling at me.

And yes, I’d hope I would know my baby from looking but I might also have to be put under either during or straight after so this adds a bit of an extra layer to my (admittedly ridiculous) worry.

How do hospitals make absolutely sure that each baby goes to the right mum these days?

My first did have a little armband but it was a little lose. What if it just slipped off?

I don’t know what I expect the answer to be, I just want to feel a bit better about it (and I have now given myself the challenge to not read or listen to the news until delivery if possible because it clearly has a terrible effect on me right now!).

The hospital I had mine at put tags on both wrists and both ankles..it seemed like overkill but they're not coming off.

I had a planned c section and DS was taken straight to NICU. My DH had to wait outside the theatre when he was born but accompanied DS to NICU....there was no time (or other baby) for him to be swapped. Arrange for someone to go with the baby so your mind is at rest.

Ours does too! I only.realised the ankle one when I panicked and thought she had a funny looking ankle in her onesie, and found the ankle one... That was 4 days in. What can I say, the sleep deprivation was real.

Bands go on both feet. Very unlikely to lose both.

Definitely do the NICU tour if you can. DD1 was an unexpected NICU baby and I wish I'd known what to expect. She was there for two weeks in the end. You'll be able to ask these questions and I'm sure person doing the tour will be able to put your mind at ease. Sending best wishes for baby when they land earthside!

It's happened once and it was decades ago.

You will be fine.

My DD was born at 32 weeks by emergency c-section and DH was allowed to go from theatre with her to NICU. She had the bands on her before leaving theatre and as others have said, they’re strong so won’t come off. I was happy to be left in theatre without my DH and felt reassured that he followed her from theatre to her incubator in NICU as I suddenly felt worried I wouldn’t know if she’d got muddled with another baby. Of course rational brains know it’s highly unlikely but these situations are stressful and make us think all sorts of things. My DH was then able to come back to me in recovery after he’d noted where DD was and taken pics of her too. This all helped me to feel reassured and could help you too if possible and something you’d feel comfortable with. Wishing you all the best of your c-section and the NICU stay if it happens. It can be a tough journey so be kind to yourself and get all the support you can.

Back in the early 80s my dsis was born with a genetic condition. This meant that when my dm fell pregnant again, they opted for an Amniocentesis, one of the results they had was confirmation that they were having a boy.

When he was born, he had the cord around his neck, and was immediately whisked away for care. A midwife later came back and congratulated my dp on the birth of their baby girl, at which point dp became vocal about the amnio and how they were having a boy. Yes, there were 2 babies born within minutes of each other, and yes they were muddled.

When ds2 was born early at home, we arrived at hospital in an ambulance and the paramedics whisked ds2 away for care. I made dh follow them and remember yelling like a mad women that he was not to let ds2 out of his sight until he was tagged. Dh was concerned about me being left alone, but did as instructed. All was fine though, they had tags ready and it was one of the first things they did.

I think that policies and procedures are much better around this nowadays and the risk is very much lower than it was back then. It's easy to say don't worry, but honestly, the chances of this happening to you are so low, that it's not worth wasting the energy on.

Please don't worry OP.

The incident referred to in the news item happened in 1967 and the article says this is the only confirmed case of this happening in the UK / England (can't remember which it says).

They have different procedures in place now.

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

My daughter's fell off and they asked me to confirm she was my baby. I had a simialr fear. Take a photo straight away so you can compare when you get them back

If you are still worried after you have spoken to your midwife , here are some other things you can do to reassure yourself.

ask your birth partner to check that baby has a name band on before baby leaves theatre ( assuming baby has to go to NICU, otherwise they will stay with you ).

ask your birth partner to go with baby to NICU instead of staying with you . They can then come back to see you in recovery once baby is settled in NICU. And they will be able to take photos etc, check the label on the cot etc

I hope you will feel less anxious by then , but sometimes it helps to have a plans B C and D .

please be reassured to know it’s normal to have these types of worries in pregnancy, just as long as it’s not getting so big that it’s taking over your life IYSWIM.