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How can I help this person?

52 replies

Coolbreezee · 28/10/2024 17:38

There's a man who works in the area I live (London) clearing rubbish, sweeping leaves, general maintenance that kind of thing. He is the most friendly person. I see him every day, he greets me with a smile, he makes a fuss of my baby in the pushchair. He is one of those people that brightens up everyones day. He is the same with everyone and very popular with the locals.

Over the past few months he's told me more about himself and he is actually a very interesting human being. He is 60 years old. He has 7 children. When his youngest was 7 years old, his wife died of cancer. He raised the children himself. Oldest is a lawyer, youngest now studying to be a neurosurgeon (which is why he has this job to help support her through school). He attended a top university in his home country, and taught mathematics. He also can speak 7 languages including English, french Dutch, German and Arabic. I asked him why he didn't get another job. The answer: his degree certificates need to be translated from dutch and this will cost at least £4000 which he doesn't have. I know he is pretty down about his job, but he doesn't let it show. He works so hard every day rain or shine from 7am to 5pm.

Is there anything I can do to help this person? Does anyone know about the process of translating certificates? Its seems like such a waste of human knowledge and talent.

OP posts:
EggandStress · 28/10/2024 17:42

If his oldest is a lawyer could he not help him out in some way?

StillAtTheRestaurant · 28/10/2024 17:43

It's nice that you're a friendly person, but don't believe everything you hear.

Coolbreezee · 28/10/2024 17:44

EggandStress · 28/10/2024 17:42

If his oldest is a lawyer could he not help him out in some way?

I did wonder that myself. I don't know his family situation.

OP posts:
Crinkle77 · 28/10/2024 19:02

I'm sorry but he's buttering you up and telling you a sob story for money.

Whothefuckdoesthat · 28/10/2024 19:03

He has a lawyer and a trainee neurosurgeon as children (always a brain surgeon isn’t it? Never someone who deals with the colon) who are aware that he’s doing a job he hates, far below his skill set and they haven’t worked out between them that a measly 4K (in the grand scheme of things) would enable him to earn so much more and be happy? Live in a better place etc?

Does that really sound credible to you?

FuzzyGoblin · 28/10/2024 19:03

Crinkle77 · 28/10/2024 19:02

I'm sorry but he's buttering you up and telling you a sob story for money.

This.

notatinydancer · 28/10/2024 19:15

Really Confused

applepipshake · 28/10/2024 19:17

Whothefuckdoesthat · 28/10/2024 19:03

He has a lawyer and a trainee neurosurgeon as children (always a brain surgeon isn’t it? Never someone who deals with the colon) who are aware that he’s doing a job he hates, far below his skill set and they haven’t worked out between them that a measly 4K (in the grand scheme of things) would enable him to earn so much more and be happy? Live in a better place etc?

Does that really sound credible to you?

This. I am sorry but this doesnt sound even remotely likely.

Elderflower14 · 28/10/2024 19:20

Sorry, he's selling you a sob story... If his children can't help him who can?? 🙄

LittleRedRidingHoody · 28/10/2024 19:23

He may not be trying to get money out of you (though it's definitely a possibility!)

I think honestly he knows the odds, even with a translated degree, of finding a corporate job with no related experience here, at the age he'd be to have adult children, is low. This is common, I've met countless immigrants who unfortunately, despite being extremely intelligent and having multiple degrees from home countries, are stuck in minimum wage jobs. Sometimes it's easier to accept 'that'll cost £4K which I don't have' than 'if I keep pushing and applying for things, I'll likely get rejected anyway.'

FictionalCharacter · 28/10/2024 19:23

Sorry OP but this sounds like a heap of tall stories. I’ve been involved in hiring people from overseas and it’s never been necessary to have degree certificates translated. Overseas universities can always communicate to you in English.
To “train” to be a neurosurgeon you need to already be a qualified, practising doctor. You don’t go on some course in neurosurgery at “school”. There is no such thing. So his daughter would be earning a reasonable salary.
Just smile and do the “oh gosh, really?” routine.

icelolly12 · 28/10/2024 19:24

Honestly, none of this sounds likely. He's either a bit embarrassed about his job and trying to make himself more important in your eyes, or he's hoping for you to help hi out either in cash or empathy. Take people's stories with a pinch of salt. And translating a certificate surely wouldn't cost 4k?

Stormyweatheroutthere · 28/10/2024 19:24

Maybe in his wishful thinking his dc are so successful...

SoporificLettuce · 28/10/2024 19:25

I wouldn’t believe the half of what he told you. You’re a nice person, but too naive.

walkingnightmare · 28/10/2024 19:25

If you still think it could be genuine, you could point him to https://translatorswithoutborders.org/ If they can't help, they may know an organisation that can. There are lots of Dutch people and other international academics working in this country with certificates and degrees in many different languages and this doesn't seem to be an issue, so I don't find the story very believable, I'm afraid. Sorry to burst your bubble. It's nice to want to believe the best in people, but I have a feeling this person either likes to tell a good story or, as others have said, perhaps has financial motives.

hattie43 · 28/10/2024 19:30

I find it implausible that he has a lawyer and trainee neurosurgeon children and sweeps the streets , I just do . Surely seven children can make dad's life easier with some financial support . A professional person would do all they could to use their skills and not sweep streets . Can his working children not scape together funds to help , you'd think a lawyer could find sone help .

I've no doubt he's a lovely smiley hard worker but the story .........

MaidOfSteel · 28/10/2024 19:35

If you believe him, tell him he needs a UK ENIC Statement of Comparability. I believe it costs about £60, nothing like £4000.

Keepingongoing · 28/10/2024 19:40

His story isn’t plausible for any or all of the reasons given above, I’m afraid. Have a quick Google, it doesn’t cost anything like £4K to translate a degree certificate, if it even needs to be translated, a university in the Netherlands is hardly obscure. You’re a kind-hearted person to take an interest though.

Coolbreezee · 28/10/2024 19:41

Wow. I wasn't expecting these responses. I really do believe him at least for the most part. Apparently his youngest is just starting medical school but wants to become a neurosurgeon. I don't know what the deal is with his children, they are grown but live in a different country. I believe him when it comes to his education/language skills. I got the impression that he thought paying £4k for translation would be like throwing money away because he would be unlikely to get a job at the end of it. I certainly don't think he's after any money from me but I do think he is embarrassed by the work he does now.

OP posts:
icelolly12 · 28/10/2024 19:42

Why is he in England then if his children live elsewhere and he could get a far better job in another country?

Coolbreezee · 28/10/2024 19:43

icelolly12 · 28/10/2024 19:42

Why is he in England then if his children live elsewhere and he could get a far better job in another country?

I don't know, haven't asked.

OP posts:
icelolly12 · 28/10/2024 19:45

He's quite obviously telling you a load of bullshit. I'm being blunt as you have read the unanimous politely worded responses and ignored them.

Maybe you're a bit embarrassed yourself for being so gullible!

parisinjanuary · 28/10/2024 19:49

icelolly12 · 28/10/2024 19:42

Why is he in England then if his children live elsewhere and he could get a far better job in another country?

Exactly- so he decided to move to the most expensive city in the UK and work a minimum wage job despite being super qualified for jobs in his home country and all his children being there that he raised single handedly alone?

Sorry OP but you are being very naive here...

Coolbreezee · 28/10/2024 19:50

icelolly12 · 28/10/2024 19:45

He's quite obviously telling you a load of bullshit. I'm being blunt as you have read the unanimous politely worded responses and ignored them.

Maybe you're a bit embarrassed yourself for being so gullible!

Harsh. I haven't ignored the replies, but they did surprise me. I like to believe the best in people. I am pretty gullible, or rather I like to believe people are telling the truth until proven otherwise. Yes , that has got me into some tricky situations in my life, and no, I don't think I'll ever learn. That said, I may take things he says with a pinch of salt now 🤷

OP posts:
UnderOverUp · 28/10/2024 19:52

I think what you do to help him is keep having nice bright chats with him to cheer his day and yours.

Maybe he’s truthful, lying, deceiving himself. As long as you’re not putting yourself out, does it really matter? If he’s embarrassed at his job and exaggerating his situation, then happy chatting is a good thing to ensure he knows he’s a valued member of the community. If it’s anything else, it won’t harm.

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