Why is it some people are amazing cooks?

[Violetcake]

So I can cook, I can even make pastry and I try to cook mostly from.scratch although not always and when I eat at the homes of family and friends the food is usually good but just as there are some people who's cooking is a bit rough even when they make a real effort there are some people who's cooking just has that something extra to make it really delicious and memorable.

My SIL is such an amazing cook and I swear she can make the exact same thing as me to the same recipe in the same kitchen and mine will be fine but her's will be amazing extra velvety texture, extra flavourful, extra crispy, extra melty or fluffy, you get the picture.

She like me is just a regular home cook just cooking for her family, no training or fancy gear but her food is just next level.

Why is it that some people can just cook so well?

Well it's just the same as art/hockey/violin surely? People have different talents.
You can practise and improve, but some people never get beyond a certain level no matter the amount of practice. We can't all be Michaelangelo.

As the PP has said, it's just a gift that people have, a talent. Unless you ask if you can help her while she's next cooking and see if you can get some tips etc.? Otherwise it just seems like she's a talented cook!

Are you sure it's the same recipe?

Even small differences can make a lot of difference eg a Delia recipe will probably be superior to anyone else's even for a standard dish.

Also double all quantities of herbs, spices and garlic.

@LifeInAHamsterWheel I have seen her cook before and she does make it look easy but otherwise I can't really tell what she does that is different to me. Perhaps I need to get her to talk me through what she's doing and thinking as she cooks!

Small differences

Care over the seasoning - adding slow and checking it

Patience over any mixing processes

Care not to over beat things that should hold air

Delia smith complete cookery has a lot of tips

More butter and salt? Leaving things to brown a bit longer? Better / fresher raw ingredients?

However, I think I am a reasonably good cook and I attribute it to good recipes. Some are much better than others.

I think it's a lot of factors, but experience being the main one

For example, SIL will cook something, but will only cook it for how long the recipe says. So she made osso bucco, cooked it for two hours or whatever, but it really could have done with 3.

Yes, the skill to know when something is the right consistency and all those types of things.

What exactly is your mil making, @Violetcake ?

I bet she's made it a hundred time before

Look at how chefs cook to recipe on TV. "Add a pinch of salt" <grabs a handful> "A slug of wine" <half a bottle goes in> "A tablespoon of double cream" <half a carton tipped in>.

Some people must just crack the code of what they say and what they mean.

My sister in law loves my roast potatoes. I’ve talked her through it step by step (nothing unusual) but hers never come out as good as mine. So many variables I guess, from the crop of spud down, to the fat and gaining or loosing seconds on the par boil. That said, my mum was amazing roastie maker, though I learnt from cookery books rather than mum

Also, I read some top tips from chefs. One said “we cook for you like we hate you”. You’d never get Jamie telling you to use 3 tablespoons of ghee, he’d be slated, but that’s what you’d get in a restaurant

@AnnaMagnani It's possible she makes more adjustments to the recipes, I gave her a recipe for a soup I make and her take on it was so much nicer than mine.

Yeah I think the difference is paying attention to what works, the recipe says 50g of cheese but you realise after 50g you need more to cover the top. My grans kegeree is still the best I’ve ever tasted and when you ask her to show you exactly how to make it she’s does something different every time!

but also my husbands favourite meal I make isn’t that great to me, it’s fine but I would never choose it. Ditto things he makes, tastes better than any restaurant to me but no one else is that keen.

I'm couldn't cook when I met Dh and he used to cook for us. I thought he was a great cook. After years as Sahm my cooking has improved a lot that even PIL are complementing my cooking. I can read recipes and judge how they would be and only choose ones that feel perfect.

I think people who love eating make the best cooks.

I'm a good cook (and modest) and it's because I LOVE eating and know exactly how I want to eat something and what little tweaks make food delicious.

It's also about layers of flavour so if you're cooking a tagine or curry for example you take time to add and toast the spices and veg.

I rarely follow recipes but think about what I'd like to eat and how I'd do it. That's experience though

I think good cooks often have a sensitive sense of taste that is a combination of experience and genetic factors.

They probably enjoy touching, fumbling with, preparing and smelling food.
🤢
I cannot cook anything.

You have to enjoy cooking, to take the time needed to prepare well. Like decorating, preparation is key.
Pastry for example, it's how you roll the pastry and how it's handled.
Cutting veg, learning the techniques and different cuts. There are so many ways to cut/dice an onion and all have different uses.
Cakes, using your hands to rub in the butter.
Marinating meats, using your hands to make sure the marinade is all over and not simply put it in a bowl and stir with a spoon.

I didn’t live with my bio Dad from quite young but he ran a restaurant and taught me how to cook the food of his home country so I’m very grateful. I have been cooking since I was 12 and agree with @theemmadilemma its the feel. DH can cook but is very much a recipe follower. He may ask me something like how much butter, milk, water whatever and I will reply I don’t have a clue I just do it. We clash a bit on this as he was a scientist so measured stuff by nano whatever the hell measurement it is and I set his teeth on edge if I don’t use the scales.

I however cannot stand stuff stirred anti clockwise and my English mother was very much don’t scare the cakes and massively superstitious, eggs shells had to be completely crushed before tossing in the bin as very bad luck. She was a very good plain English cook and cake baker, made amazing dumplings.

Expérience
Common sense
An excellent palate

I would say I'm a pretty excellent cook and I don't know anyone who would disagree.

I cook pretty much everything from scratch.

The joke in our house is that I rarely actually follow a recipe. I mean I use recipes regularly, although there is a lot that I just know how to cook, But i pretty much always add something, or exchange something, or leave something out. (often changing LOTS of elements of the recipe!)

I very rarely weigh stuff, I just know how much of something to add and whats makes dishes a little bit nicer.

How? Probably because I have been cooking proper dinners since I was a teenager. so after 30 years of cooking, and making lots and lots of mistakes, and disasters, I now "just know" what to do, what things should look like, and if something needs more or less liquid or flavour or cooking or time or whatever.

Things dont always go to plan, and I do still have the occasional disaster.

Also what makes a difference is my quality pans, and also I love cooking on my aga. I do not cook as well using rubbish pans and trays in a cheap electric oven or an electric hob. Also the ingrediants make a massive difference.
I make excellent cakes and bakes with real butter, but when I bake DF (for my friend with allergies) its never quite as good.... still good enough.... but nothing beats my victoria sponge made with butter / flour / sugar / eggs and vanilla extract, cooked for several minutes more in my aga, than Mary Berry cooks hers for in her aga. (again i know my oven and know that my baking oven always takes longer than Mary Berrys baking oven in her aga!)

Its like everything, practice makes perfect.

It may also be that your SIL is just more interested in food than you and spends more time thinking and reading about it and practicing. It's more of a hobby for her perhaps. Like me - I really enjoy cooking and think I'm fairly good at it. I'll often try several iterations of a recipe to get to a version that I like, I'll spend more on high quality ingredients, absorb stuff online - I like reading about the science of cooking, I buy lots of cookbooks and try new things. Not everything is a success, but I like to think my hit rate is fairly high. My family are pretty brutal with the criticism if they don't like something!

There is a great series on Netflix, I think it's catered salt fat acid heat. It's great at explaining that fat is the delivery vehicle for flavour, salt is a flavour enhancer, acid brightens and balances and heat causes caramelisation through the Maillard effect and rendering down collagen and fat etc. it's a really thorough set to watch and I think it's based on a book.

I love cooking. Absolutely bloody love it. I started work in a convivial kitchen at 14 and i lived and breathed it and it ended up that ran a restaurant at 18/19. Sadly I'm now cursed with a haha who's favourite food is mashed potato or egg and chips. It's taken me 20 years of careful titration to be able to make a proper bolognaise/chili/curry with appropriate amounts of garlic, spices and seasoning. He's the type that finds black Pepper too spicy 🤷🏼‍♀️. I do scratch made curries every week but most are korma or basic daal with meat as he's eat not adventurous. I love spice and flavour

It's not been all bad catering to his delicate palate though, it's meant that I've gone side ways and expanded my knowledge base. I bake sourdough twice weekly, I ferment my own foods, grow my own mushrooms, bake cakes by the dozen etc. but ultimately I cook benders it makes me happy on a really basic but deep level. I love it. It's both an art and a science and one you understand the foundation of the science, the art can takes over and flourish and develop.

I make great dinners, and cakes, but my pastry and scones are vile, my mum is the opposite makes lovely pastry and scones, but her meals lack any flavour.
I blame warm hands on my pastry.
I think a lot of it is down to enjoyment too.