Getting a dog - would therapy help this issue?

[taggy321]

DH and DC want a dog and I do too but I have one reservation.

I love dogs and think they are basically angels from heaven but I have this thing where I get intensely irritated by silly things - nail picking, chewing gum, and animals grooming themselves are the main ones among others. It’s mostly sounds (misophonia) but it is also the sight of certain repetitive actions that really bother me. I don’t like being around cats for this reason as I find them grooming themselves so triggering. I wouldn’t cope with a dog sitting in the same room as me licking its balls - I’d have to leave the room.

Now with this in mind, I’ve said no to the dog but I wish I wasn’t like this. I hate it about myself and feel a lot of shame. We should have a dog and I should be able to cope with other people and animals making sounds and movements that don’t affect me without getting so triggered.

I am now wondering if CBT might help? I feel like it’s in the same arena as phobias and anger management.

Any advice appreciated but please be gentle.

Yes I think it could help.
these thing quite often but not always becomes entrenched due to something you experienced but don’t necessarily remember like phobias

with anything like this though it will take work and you will have to push yourself as you will feel quite uncomfortable as of course these things as you describe trigger you and that brings up anxiety and other uncomfortable emotions.

fist things first though cut this shame out as it only adds to it and drives it!

there is nothing to be ashamed about and working on it shows you are willing to change it.

dont be disheartened, try some therapy, have an open mind and be really ready to work on it but be realistic that you may never (although you could!) get to the point where these things are pleasurable but you can definitely get to the points where they are tolerable.

good luck @taggy321

@Ginkypig thank you so much for this lovely reply. You’re right, it’s worth a shot isn’t it.

Totally worth a shot @taggy321

even if the end result is you don’t get a dog, just for you it’s worth it if it makes your life a bit better or even gives you some understanding of what and why it is happening for you which will help reduce some of the beating yourself up about it.

I really believe this can be better than it is right now for you and I’m wishing you the very best of luck

Defo worth trying.

If it works you'll be so free, (presumably) no longer having to worry about seeing a dog in the street in case it starts licking or whatever.

In the meantime tell the kids no. And see if you can get help.

Thanks so much. It does genuinely affect my life - especially as I love animals. But even my relationship is affected sometimes. I’m going to put money aside and start CBT in the new year.

There are places that do cheaper therapy that's delivered by experienced students etc who are supported by qualified staff. And charities that do it fir a contribution.

Might be worth googling now and getting the options lined up.