If you work for yourself, could you ever be employed again?

[DieDreiHexen]

I'm self employed, running a small professional practice. Prior to that, I was happily employed by a large public sector organisation, and then not happily employed by the same organisation , struggling with endless rules, meetings and admin and poor pay. I left when I was told I could not apply for a promotion unless I went full time (while navigating life with three kids, including a visually impaired toddler.)

Today I've visited a client. This afternoon was set aside for admin but it's glorious outside, so I'm taking my daughter pony out for a ride. Then when DS gets home we might head out for a swim. I'll catch up with the admin tomorrow. I've taken two calls, one from a client with an interesting piece of work I'll follow up, another from a client who sounded like a demanding nightmare who I can say 'no thanks' to. I also booked to attend a conference, paid for with my little company's money and I didn't have to ask anyone or fill in a single form to be able to go. I've got two weeks off for half term soon, and am looking forward to hanging out with my teens.

I miss the public sector pension, the paid leave and sick pay. I miss many of the brilliant projects and colleagues I met along the way. And I don't enjoy doing my accounts, dealing with professional registrations, changes in legislation etc. I always intended to rejoin the public sector when my kids were older. But having been self employed, with so much freedom I think I'd last about ten minutes and have rendered myself unmanageable.

Anyone else in a similar boat?

Yes. Pretty much what you wrote! I don’t think I could stick being told what to do / how many days holiday I was allowed and having my time managed for me like I am a child.

God no, I did it through Covid as I had no work
I went SE again as soon as I could (encouraged by comments from my employer about my lack of "team player mindset"). I have absolutely no time for pointless meetings, office gossip, discussing weekend plans , employee surveys,personal development etc etc.
I did get asked to take on a really good role a couple of months ago, great salary, benefits, looked interesting BUT during my 1st interview they banged on about Team culture and Prosecco in the fridge for Friday afternoons and how they were all one big family. I think they thought they were selling it to me but it put me right off.
I was still thinking about it but then the day before the next interview me and the DC just decided to go to the seaside for the day the night before (I had work to do but it wasn't time sensitive) and I realised that if I had a proper job I couldn't have done it.
Unless I REALLY needed the money I would never do it, assuming anyone would want me at over 50 and with a bad attitude!

I think it's having my time managed I'd find hardest. Especially being told when I can take leave.

And I suspect I'd get fired for eye rolling and rudeness in pointless meetings.

No chance!!
If I want an early finish, I go.
I plan my work around kids and days out, I do not work major holidays including christmas.

Could not do that with an employed role!

I really don't think I could. Not only would I not want to answer to anyone, but I also wouldn't want to go back to working regular hours.

At the moment, so long as my work gets done, I can do it whenever I like. This means I'm always free to do anything I want, whenever I want. Most of the time I do adhere to working in "normal" working times, but if I want a break, I can have one, and if I need the afternoon/whole day off, I can just take it and make up for it somewhere else.

The hobbies I have are quite time consuming so this is super helpful and it really does work well.

@Hoppinggreen I get what you mean about being part of a team.

I'm not a team player. I find collaborating with others very irritating. 'Lone wolf' is a hard trait to sell to an employer.

Nah. Work life balance is my priority and is in my own hands!

I'm so happy to read these replies. I'm so glad it's not just me.

I have been self-employed for 20 years. I will never, ever be full time employed ever again.

I like the flexibility, being my own boss, having the freedom to turn down projects if the client appears on first interaction to be a nightmare, I have a good Whatsapp group community with other people in the same field, I do lots of other things too including a bit of film/tv extra work which is totally different to my main job but if I were employed I would not have the ability to say yes to short notice availability calls.

I was warned that I needed to "consider how I come across to other people" when I told a colleague that I really didn't like that I only wanted to discuss work matters with him after he tried to get pally with me.
Thing is you get employed for your focus and ability to cut through the bullshit to the issue and solve it but then they don't like it when you do, don't get me wrong I am generally pleasant and never rude (mostly) but I don't care what everyone is doing at the weekend.

Hmm, I went self employed in 2022 and struggled a bit with clients. I go networking for companies that don't have time to network. So business development but in person rather than sending emails and bashing the phone. Then I took on a client one day a month, that grew to one day a week and now I work for them three days a week as an employee as my day rate was too much for them. This gives me a nice balance of guaranteed income and two days to either chill out, like today, got my hair and nails done, have a client meeting at 2pm and then a couple of hours studying for an exam I have in November. Or take on extra clients. I also volunteer one Friday a month. I don't envisage ever going back to an office, but I would if I have to.

I think you have an outdated view of being employed. In my experience it's changed massively over the last 20 years. I'm now fairly senior in the public sector, I work when I want from the office or home. I'm responsible for delivering as per my role, but decline meetings I don't want to go to and manage my own time pretty much. I appreciate the pension, sick pay etc, whilst managing my work life balance in a way that suits me 80% of the time.

God I don’t miss that thing in an office where colleagues go all huffy and quiet and you are left wondering what you have done wrong and you know you haven’t done anything!

Am 50 too don’t think I would make a very good employee am definitely too rebellious after 10 years doing my own thing! I love that I can do what I want when we got a hot day I took Dd to the beach on a Tuesday. I can spend a long time chatting to elderly clients as am not on the clock.

How long have you been doing this? I've been running my own little businses now for just over 10 years. I could have written your post 5 years ago.

But actually, now I'm not completely sure. For a start, the rollercoaster of finances has been hard. I'm the main breadwinner so its' been stressful - lose a big client and we're scrambling. And while we've tried, we've never reall ybeen able to build up much of a protective layer for lean times or, if we do, we have to then use it. Similarly, I'm conscious I haven' tbeen paying enough into my pension and that all my various insurances are expensive and not as comprehensive as I had when I worked in the City.

At the same time, professionally, for years I felt like you - I loved not being micro managed, not having to deal with all that shit etc. But now there's a part of me that's getting frustrated because I'm also not really part of the decision making. I sit and wait for clients to agree to work, to brief me on the work, to sign off the work. When I do the work, I'm doing it always in line with what they want and of course, they value my input and experience, but I'm not the one who gets to make the final decision. Also often I am hamstrung by internal processes with no power or opportunity to cut through them. This didn't bother me for years, but perhaps as a result of my children being older and me being able/willing to put a bit more of myself into work, it IS irritating me now.

And from a personal perspective, post Covid, things have changed. I used to be in town a lot, meeting clients etc. Now, I almost never see people in person. I have a lot of clients in New York but even they used to visit - they just don't anymore. So I'm at home, all day every day.

And that brings additional irritations - I'm 100% default parent, the one who collects when children are sick etc. It's vey hard to say, "no, you have to skip your shift at work DH because I need to focus on this research report" when I'm sitting at home anyway. Somehow, we've slipped into a situation where because DH works out of the house, even though i work longer hours and more money, I'm back to doing a lot of the household tasks. Similarly, the kids will ask me to drive them places/drop things off etc. Obviously, I could and should say no but it's not as easy as that vs if I had an actual job and/or was in town a lot more.

Currently, I'm hoping to find a part time job that will allow me to still do some, albeit less, freelance work.

I was self-employed for about 10 years, and am now an employee. I got fed up with my clients not paying promptly and having to chase and chase them for the money, and in the end decided I'd had enough of it.

Although I miss the autonomy, I don't miss having to do a self-assessment tax return, that's for sure!

Perhaps the key here is that you are now fairly senior. For the average employed person, I doubt whether they would be allowed that level of freedom.

Fuck no. I am really not cut out to be compliant.

Nope.
I am technically employed (PAYE) but I run my own diary, choose the work I want to do and take time off as/when I feel like it, this works as DH is self employed and we go away about 4/5 times a year for 2/3 (sometimes longer) weeks at a time.
Done this for 15 years.

I love the freedom and flexibility of being SE but I've had a smallish employed job alongside for 6 months or so and I'm enjoying that balance.

I'd definitely struggle with being employed FT but I've worked PT most of the time since having children (employed first, SE later) so it would also be an adjustment in those terms.

If the right job came up, I would go back to employment as my main job. But it would have to be very right.

This sounds like my dream. I'm employed and fed up of meetings and asking for permission to take 30 mins out for a school pick up even though I'm fairly senior.

Was it an easy transition to make?

Depends on the firm. My son started his first "proper" graduate entry level job last September and has been there a year. It's one of the country's largest insurance firms. Even since day 1, he's been pretty much free to manage his time and workload. He can clock on/off when he wants, work from home when he wants, just as long as he "attends" pre-booked meetings. He has a daily teams call with his immediate line manager and weekly teams calls for his entire department which are non negotiable unless he's booked off on annual leave or study leave, which is basically the only "tie" he has. Other than that, as long as the work gets done, he's happy and they're happy. He chooses who he wants to get "pally" with in the workplace as it's all hot desking so he never has to sit near anyone he doesn't like and in reality, he and his "friends" book desks close to each other on the days they're in the office, even if they're in different teams/departments. He has no problems at all with other workers, nor the workplace. They even have "chill out" rooms where they can go if they want a bit of time to themselves away from the stress of the work/colleagues - there's a firm rule that anyone in a chill out isn't disturbed, no ifs, no buts - other than a fire alarm, they can't be disturbed by anyone nor anything, even the senior bosses!

I would actually go to employed if I had perfect health/no disabilities, I much preferred it, I like the security of it and the you’re going to get at least minimum wage type thing, the ability to move up the rungs etc. I kinda hate self employment for me, the fact it’s all on me, sometimes my wage is atrocious when I work it out etc, but I need the flexibility because of health

Public sector isn't always the same as Private sector.
Also, I was employed by large companies for over 10 years before going SE. When I went back to employment in 2020 due to Covid I found the things I hated about being employed still existed.
Luckily I have other options

I worked for myself/had a small business with a partner for 16 years. But sadly the business environment got tougher and tougher and my partner didn't want to continue. At the same time, my DH was facing redundancy, so I had to look for employment.

There were many things about it that were great - working with other people, a definite, regular salary, a good pension, plenty of social events etc. But a lot that I found hard after being my own boss for so long - especially limited holiday days, having to ask for holiday (and being turned down on one occasion ) as well as having to commute to work every day.

If I had had the chance, I would definitely have continued working for myself, but economic circumstances ruled that out.

God, no way. I love having the freedom to do what I want, when I want, to take a day off, to work in my PJs, to take on the jobs I want with clients I like, and not to have to consult anyone about what I do!!