Hen do and newborn

[TwinklyDreamer]

Hi all! A family member is getting married next year and I’ve recently found out I’m pregnant (first child). They expect me to come on a weekend hen abroad about 1-2 months after the baby is born. Even in the UK I feel like it’s a lot to ask and if it is in the UK I will be having my partner stay close by so I can feed if needed. I am planning on BF my baby and worried that it’s not enough time to get them used to a bottle. I guess I also don’t know how I will feel in myself

can you give me any advice? Thoughts?

Mine took a bottle at that age but I just didn’t want to be away from them for more than an hour or 2 until they were older. You may be one of those mums running out the door wanting the break but equally you may not. For that reason I would decline it, personally.

I’m about to miss a close friend’s wedding due to having a 3 month old bf baby. Friend has been very sweet and understanding because most people know that you don’t want to / can’t leave an infant that young. Don’t commit and perhaps say depending on plans you could come along for a meal (with partner and baby close by for feeding if required!).

I didn't want to be away from my breastfed baby at that age, for any time at all, and he wouldn't have wanted me to be away either! I was also still bleeding off and on until 12 weeks and had a slow but steady recovery from c section. Definitely not physically or mentally inclined for a hen do of any description!

It's an invitation not a summons, so no need to worry about justifying your feelings 🙂

If you were fully bottle feeding you would be able to do this but there's an excellent chance you'd have zero desire to. If you're breastfeeding then no chance.

My SIL's hen do was was when DC1 was 5 months. I was only ever going to go for the day bit, no chance I could leave DC on evening or overnight. We spent weeks with me pumping and wasting tons of milk trying to get him to take a bottle just so I could go to those few hours. Which was nice but no way I'd have even considered it any further away or for longer or at a younger age.

I wouldn't have gone tbh, even an UK based one would be a struggle.
I wouldn't have rushed introducing a bottle just for a hen do and you don't know how you'll get on with expressing, some women find it easy but a lot including me find it quite hard to express much on top of feeding as well. It's going to be quite a challenge to express enough milk for a couple of days.

Just say you're not going now so the bride has time to get used to it

Spot on.