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My husband is mean

30 replies

Feelingsadd · 07/10/2024 23:05

Just need to vent. I feel so lonely and crave love so badly

my husband is just so mean I feel like he hates me. I vent to one of my sister a lot we’re close and she says he doesn’t it’s a rough patch

we have 2 very young kids , it’s quite stressful both under 3 yo. It’s been tough I’ve been depressed. And he’s just expected me to get on with it

He hasn’t understood the struggles and how I’ve felt. He made a comment about me making excuses not to have sex and I’ve had 0 sex drive since I had my 2nd baby who’s 7 months old

he just tells me off all the time constantly just seems annoyed and even little things makes fun of me being anxious

I do want to work on things but sometimes the way he acts I just think fuck you? Why would I want to work when he’s just so bitter and has gone so mean

he says he’s stressed and said he needs sex - I get it to a point but I’m so drained I haven’t had a full nights sleep in over 7 months, our eldest is a toddler still so it’s quite chaotic? I have no sex drive

but I don’t know if I’m being whiny here and it’s just a rough patch I need to get over

OP posts:
M103 · 08/10/2024 00:40

He is mean. You deserve better. Leave him.

Delphiniumandlupins · 08/10/2024 00:51

His behaviour sounds deliberate. He knows you're anxious about things, like driving, and doesn't help or support you to be less anxious - he could go with you to drive on a motorway, tell you what you're doing well. His "just get on with it" attitude is not encouraging at all. However, he likes to be in control and isn't happy that you are in control of your children - soon he will belittle you in front of them, if he isn't already. He has emotional outbursts, due to his ADHD, but your emotions are wrong and weakness? It's your fault you don't want to be intimate, not his fault that he is frankly unattractive. Despite what he claims he doesn't want you to be strong and independent because then you would stand up to his bullying.

Feelingsadd · 08/10/2024 07:38

This sounds silly but a big pull for staying with him is I don’t want to not se my kids 100% of the time

hed get joint custody if we split and not seeing them all the time would break me

OP posts:

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jannier · 08/10/2024 07:55

Feelingsadd · 08/10/2024 07:38

This sounds silly but a big pull for staying with him is I don’t want to not se my kids 100% of the time

hed get joint custody if we split and not seeing them all the time would break me

Staying with him is breaking you and teaching children a bad abusive role model.

Mmhmmn · 18/06/2025 23:19

It doesn't sound silly. But given his meanness, are the kids really that likely to want to be around him that much anyway? And how likely is he to want to step up to a lot of kid days?

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