My Late Dad’s Hat….. what do I do?

[ImNunTheWiser]

So, bit of an odd one, I’ll admit…
My DF died, coming up for, three years ago. He wore a Panama hat for years, it epitomised him. When he died, my stepmum gave it to me. No one is going to wear it so it’s just sitting there, getting dusty and (as it’s essentially straw) probably slowly rotting. I feel I need/should do something about it, but what? If one of the grandchildren said they’d wear it, that’d be perfect, but despite how random they are in terms of attire, it’s not going to happen. So what do I do? I thought get someone to do a painting of it, so when it eventually keels over, we have something easier to display as a tribute. But I’m not sure because if I did that, I’d still have to dispose of the actual hat, and that feels wrong.
Any ideas?

Watching with interest. I have my great grandfather's silk running cap in a box in a cupboard somewhere. I can't dispose of it. 😕

I have my late Dad's cap in the boot of my car. I smile every time I open it 😊

Press and frame it or take a very good photo of it and frame it.

I'd keep it, it will smell of him.
Maybe get a large box frame and put it in. X

I have my grandads flat cap and keep meaning to put up a hook and hang it next to a pic of him!

Frame it in a box frame or hang it on the wall. Lots of people use hats as art pieces and decor.

Oh bless you, it’s seems both silly and immense at the same time, doesn’t it?

This is such a coincidence as I've just binned my Dads Panama hat. He loved it. I had bought it for him from a fancy shop in Jermyn Street in London. It was one of the very few things that we didn't get rid of when he died. He wasn't into possessions at all and we are not a family who are sentimental about objects so binning it didn't feel wrong.

What about taking a nice photo of it then binning it?

Can you get it made into something else
Like you can use favourite clothing to create a memory cushion or something like?

Oh, press it, hadn’t considered that…might work…

My FIL has his late father’s straw panama hat hung on a hook in his study. They really should last decades if kept in a dry place out of direct sunlight.

I have a hat of my dad's that he wore at Christmas to be daft. Every Christmas I put it on the table as part of the decorations. I used to set him a place and put the hat on his plate but I only have 5 best plates and along came ds so dad is plateless but acknowledged as part of our Christmas meal. He wore a flat cap or straw hat depending on the season but I don't know what happened to his non-daft hats. I have my straw boater from school (I left in 1987) that hasn't rotted so perhaps you could display it somewhere and make a feature out of it?

Would and could you have it made into something else that you could more easily keep as a memento? (I’ve no idea what though..) Or could you face giving it to charity if you could see it as a bit of your dad living on in the world? 💐

Well, we are keeping it, but I feel it’s just going to gradually disappear and maybe not in a dignified way, so I want to preserve either it, or the other essence of it, but not sure how…

Yes, both of these things - I just don’t know how. I want to keep the idea (I’m not a ‘things’ keeping person) but not sure how - the physical hat, I’d be overjoyed if someone else could wear it and it would therefore continue to be useful. Urghh, does that make sense?

Yes, this is a good idea, it’s sort of what I was thinking but I have no idea what. It’s an alternative to giving it away. I just feel I can’t give it away without having a memento of it but I just don’t know what/how?

Ikea box frame, if you can get the correct size to fit. Maybe spray hat with something to preserve it first? I also really like the idea of getting a painting done of it, in case it disintegrates over time and has to be disposed of.

Could you give it to a school drama department so that it can live on in other stories?

I was given my dad's bone china mug after he died.

I hated him, but for some reason, after he died, I became utterly terrified that I might break or chip the mug. God knows why, he was evil to me at times, I was terrified of him.

Yet this mug became the most precious thing I owned. It just didn't make sense.

Completely different scenario to you OP but I decided to bring an end to the utter madness of it.

On the 10th anniversary of his death, I threw it over the Hoover Dam, (100% true). Most cathartic fucking thing I've ever done.

Sorry OP, I'm assuming you loved your Dad and so this isn't helpful in the slightest.

Could you make it into a lamp shade? I do like the idea from.a PP of hanging it on a hook next to his photo.

Sorry, I realise my post isn't remotely helpful 😢

I had a flower from my wedding bouquet turned into a paperweight. Obviously the flower was dried first. So I would assume something similar could be done with the straw material? Then a small piece could be preserved forever.

Oh I actually love this idea, but I still need a memento so maybe, a picture of it followed by a donation like this is the way to go.

I understand. I’ve had complicated relationships with both parents. ❤️

I'm sorry for your loss. I've just today had a massive clear out of my parents things that were in my garage. 13 years since I lost DD, 23 since DM. I've become less sentimental over time but I'll never part with my mum's slippers. I don't know your financial situation but could you commission an artist to paint a picture from a photo of your dad wearing the hat and use bits of the hat stuck on the painting?