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Should I feel bad about this?

8 replies

Bingowashisnamd · 04/10/2024 12:00

Mum of 2, 2 y 9 month old and a9month old. It’s been hard. I was depressed at the start. It’s getting better

i got this weird thing after having the baby where I needed to leave the house everyday and felt so guilty if I didn’t go out with my eldest. We went the park in winter as for 6 weeks I couldn’t drive so I was constantly going local places walks locally which got boring but I couldn’t sit ij

as times went on and I could drive we’ve went loads more places lots of play centres, museums c outdoor places like a forest lakeside all the fun stuff

weve been on holiday and have 3 trips coming up, one this weekend. Disney in December and a city break in November

i still feel guilty if we don’t go somewhere when he’s not inn nursery

today it’s been hard to get ready he’s been running around playing doesn’t want to go out yet now is singing to Miss Rachel for A brief minute. It’s hard balancing the two

i thought do we just go on a local walk, play at home today as we go to CBeebies land on Sunday so we are going somewhere this weekend

but as it’s sunny and crisp I feel guilty for not going to a park or out somewhere major and I’m like what if it rains all next week

but there’ll be more days like this? So I can always go the park whenever

i just get riddled with guilt if we don’t do an ‘outing’ each day. But it’s mid day and I’m finding it hard to try and convince him to put his top on he keeps running away so is topless!! And playing with blocks

OP posts:
DontBiteTheCat · 04/10/2024 12:01

He sounds very happy as he is!

You don’t have to be out every day, it sounds like you do a lot of lovely things so a relaxed day at home could be just what you both need. Put your feet up and have a cuppa x

Growlybear83 · 04/10/2024 12:08

But if your son is happy, there's no need to take him out every day. He clearly doesn't want to go out, and would probably be happier to just sit on the floor and play with his toys with you.

Bingowashisnamd · 04/10/2024 12:18

I worry I’m boring and not good at playing. He’s good at independent play as he loves cars so loves them and goes to nursery etc

i just feel bad that I’m not giving him enough experiences that I’m boring etc

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DontBiteTheCat · 04/10/2024 12:23

OP I mean this kindly, but do you suffer with anxiety/depression?

He doesn’t care if you’re playing “right”. You don’t bore him, you are his whole world and he will just be happy to be spending time with you x

Bingowashisnamd · 04/10/2024 13:11

i do yes I got really depressed after the birth of my 2nd too

i find it hard to juggle both of them and I get sensory overload with things which I’m sure all mums do

so going out helped that too I felt it helped reset

OP posts:
DontBiteTheCat · 04/10/2024 18:57

Bingowashisnamd · 04/10/2024 13:11

i do yes I got really depressed after the birth of my 2nd too

i find it hard to juggle both of them and I get sensory overload with things which I’m sure all mums do

so going out helped that too I felt it helped reset

If it helps you, then by all means go out every day! I can fully understand that. Just don’t think that you HAVE to for your son to be happy x

Bingowashisnamd · 04/10/2024 18:58

DontBiteTheCat · 04/10/2024 18:57

If it helps you, then by all means go out every day! I can fully understand that. Just don’t think that you HAVE to for your son to be happy x

Thank you that’s the issue it’s turned into I’m worried if I don’t go out he’ll be unhappy / bored./ hate me

OP posts:
DontBiteTheCat · 04/10/2024 20:01

Bingowashisnamd · 04/10/2024 18:58

Thank you that’s the issue it’s turned into I’m worried if I don’t go out he’ll be unhappy / bored./ hate me

He won’t ever hate you! Please don’t put so much pressure on yourself, you haven’t “failed” if you have a day at home. I had many days at home and my two have turned out ok!

Did you end up going out today?

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