Advice for Managing Toddler Tantrums During Mealtime?

[ForHonestHedgehog]

Hi everyone,
I’m really struggling with my toddler's tantrums during mealtime, especially when it comes to trying new foods. He gets upset and refuses to eat, and it's starting to turn into a daily battle. I've tried being patient and offering alternatives, but nothing seems to help. Does anyone have tips or strategies that have worked for you to make mealtime less stressful?
Would love to hear your experiences!

I presume there is always something there he recognises and prefers and having things he prefers on his plate , family style serving or part of the meal serving/choosing how much himself. We never had too many food issues really and I wondered if this was because each meal was already adapted for meat eaters and not , so always a bit of a choice within parameters. Take the pressure off but make new foods available. Show you are eating them and enjoying them, comment on this but not too obviously aimed at them. Occasionally if I did something no one else liked so much (because I think that's fair enough that sometimes I had my favourite) I would just offer simple alternative of something on toast without expecting to persuade to have the original thing. Few snacks in between meals and healthy snacks mostly.

I've tried being patient and offering alternatives, but nothing seems to help

What are you trying to achieve?

Do you want him to eat specific things, or just things to be calmer?

I used to just offer a range of food, let them eat what they wanted, then end the meal when they were done.

Are you trying to 'encourage' him to eat? That causes them to feel very stressed.

If you can, obviously I don't know your schedule, I'd be more inclined to try introducing new things at lunchtime as they're often less tired and grumpy than in the evening. For evening meals I agree with PP on serving family style with something familiar.

We all eat the same thing at mealtimes and I serve it up family style so my daughter can help herself (with assistance) She has to try everything and only gets dessert if she eats half of what she puts on her plate. It works well for us, broccoli is her fave food and has been since we did BLW.

How are you serving your meals?

I'm not sure how old your child is, but food should never be a battle. Just offer food and if he doesn't want it, no big deal. Porridge before bed or toast later if he's hungry, but no need to worry. Eventually he will start trying more things if you are all eating together and modelling enjoying it, with no pressure at all.

I have ARFID so I was keen for mealtimes not to be a battle in our house because it triggers my anxiety around food. I don't know if we do it right but DD eats quite well and sits nicely with us even if she doesn't want to eat.

I've always taken the approach with our 4 year old DD that she doesn't have to eat anything she doesn't want to but there's nothing else except toast afterwards.

I think about how adults will say "I don't fancy eating that today" but kids will generally say "yuck" because they don't know how to articulate that they just don't want it and whereas we'd accept an adult saying that they don't want it, with kids the response tends to be "but you like it" etc so it becomes a battle from the outset.

Sometimes if DD isn't eating something (because she's distracted usually) that I know she generally likes we try to make it a bit playful, so I will say something to DH like "I've heard that peas make you really tickly" or "do you think carrots make you glow in the dark" which usually gets DD engaged in the meal again, she knows it's all pretend but it tends to get us all giggling during dinner time as opposed to there being a battle.

We also talk about dinner amongst ourselves while we're eating, "I'm eating my carrots first", "ooh have you tried the potatoes, they're delicious", I think it tends to help because we're not directly telling her to try something rather talking together but I find when we do this she typically joins in with the conversation and shares what she's going to eat first.