What is the most annoying thing to ever wake you up?

[OliveCrab]

Neighbours with power tools

Cats sicking up hairballs on the carpet just outside the bedroom door (especially my girl cat, who is THE MOST DRAMATIC vomiter ever).

Someone slamming the front door (just before 6am) and proceeding to blast loud music

My neighbour who goes out at 5am and it seems like he opens every door on his car then slams them shut, very loudly, one by one. This then wakes up my dog who barks. I have no idea why he has to open and close the car door so many fucking times before he gets in it 🤬

Neighbour's fucking car alarm after midnight, then at 10 minute intervals for the rest of the night. At least five times over the last year.

(When I say 'neighbour', this is a bloke who lives in the flat complex over the road, no idea which flat, so can't do anything about it...)

Take That.

That dreaded special kind of long, deep cough that the DCs do when they're being sick in the night all over themselves, their beds and the carpet.

Now we have a puppy who does exactly the same cough/vom combo!

Smoke alarm batteries beeping at 3am. I ended up stabbing it, not my finest hour.

When the cat wants breakfast at 4am and yowls insistently until I get up and show her that her bowl is full. She starts eating, I go back to bed, then she starts yowling to ask "where are you?" , before climbing the stairs to join me in bed.
She's 17 now and an old lady so gets away with this.
I may start leaving her good bowl in our bedroom at nighttime

My husband trying to be quiet in the night! I have said to him so many times when he needs to get up for a pee "please put your light on, it has a good shade, and you know that I wear an eye mask in bed anyway!" But no, he is sure that he can be quiet enough and not knock into something that then falls over and startles me awake. He has to get up every night to pee (enlarged prostate), and he doesn't actually wake me every time, but several times a week is usual... Bless Him! 🙈🙈🙈

Yep, my vote goes to vomiting cats too!

Also DH waking me up 'in a special way' when he knows I take forever to wake up enough in the morning to want sex!! (tbf he's got the message over the years, and it only tends to happen on holiday now. 😄)

The man around the corner with a diesel van that sounds like a huge bag of spanners jangling when he starts it. 3 times a week he wakes me up.

The fox that goes past our house about 5am, makes all the dogs on the street bark.

This is going to sound stupid but...

Bird song.

Now I know I should have been grateful to be woken by the sweet sound of bird song, and I'm normally a bird-song lover, but I basically just lay there thinking "I'm not fucking Snow White, why is that bird making such a racket??"

I'm not at my best first thing in the morning tbh.

A Beatles song skipping on a record player that someone had left on. I woke up so disoriented with it!!!

Another vote for the pre-puke sound that my dog makes. I can visualise his wee ribcase heaving with the effort of his retches. Then when the sound ends you know you have a mess to clear up.....

Frog screaming in the living room (cat brought it in).

My ex 😬

Heavy lorries with rattling tailgates up & down the road outside my house every weekday between 5am & 5pm, approximately one every 15 minutes. I'm hoping when the new development they are supplying is finished then this will stop.

Ear-plugs do not help as they shake the house!

Okay definitely not the worst one but... my husband kissing me awake.

He leaves ridiculously early for work, and I do prefer that he wake me to say bye-bye. But he needs to wake me first AND THEN do the goodbye kiss. When he wakes me WITH a kiss I feel like I'm being suffocated as I return to consciousness. It definitely ruins my day 😅

Oh, and toddler screams at 5am.

The neighbours bins being collected...if I hear the noise and realise we forgot to put ours out the night before. They come pretty much on the dot of 7am. It's fine if I know ours are out, I can settle back down thankful for people doing this thankless task, but otherwise it's throw on clothes to race to drag out whichever of the pair of bins being done that day hasn't yet been done.

Ah the peeing in the night. DH tries to do quietly (and fails) but in the end I put a torch by his bedside so he didnt trip over anything or bump into something.

Only thing is... can you imagine a large shadow coming towards you in the middle of the night in the dark with a torch when he comes back to bed. Binned that idea

Low glucose alarm from DS’ blood glucose monitor. Adrenaline surge every.single.time.

It used to be next door's yappy little dog early in the morning, but it's died now. I like dogs but had some truly murderous thoughts about that one. They'd often let it out to bark at about midnight too, when I was already asleep.

The repetitive coo-ing of pigeons at first light also drives me crazy.

Another neighbour revving his stupidly loud car at 7am. Thankfully they've now moved. Just as well because everyone hated the guy.

My selfish neighbour who is around 40 years old but drives a teenagers car with a loud exhaust. Wakes up everyone at 6am. Worse in winter as he'll leave the car running for ages.

I see your cat sick on the carpet outside the bedroom, and raise you a cat being sick on the bed you are sleeping in.

Yes!!!!!!!!!! 🤬