I am ashamed

[Bookridden]

I am 51 years old and 3.5 stone overweight. This is entirely because I am greedy and seemingly unable to manage my portion sizes or resist the lure of high calorie foods. As a result of being obese, I get out of breath and sweaty really easily. I disgust myself (and probably some of the people around me tbh). Yet even this self disgust doesn't seem to spur me in to tackle this obesity.

I am ashamed to seek medical help. I don't know why I'm posting really. This is a problem entirely if my own making. I wish I could do better.

I do low carb and running but the threads on Mounjaro on here look effective

Would you give that a try op?

Try and work out what is the reason, my sister over ate because of unhappiness. When she was widowed she lost 5 stone, she was miserable with him. We are five sisters when unhappy three over eat and myself and younger sister are the opposite and don’t eat enough. For many women it’s emotional. Tackle the root cause if you can and start walking as much as you can. Good luck

Thank you @spackleplumb . I'm ashamed to say it was the same old story. I did indeed make a serious attempt to restrict calories - lasted for 2 weeks and lost 3lbs - unfortunately let it all go during a few stressful days and am presumably back where I started, if not worse. I need to try again, but I don't really believe I can do it tbh. I just have this huge failure of willpower.

Try not to focus on restricting the amount of food you’re eating but just making sure it’s whole healthy nutritious food.

my down fall used to be that I would try and eat as little as possible thinking it would help me lose weight and then I would become so hungry I would be madly craving biscuits or rubbish food.

now I do not restrict and just make sure it’s “good” food and because I’m giving mY body what it needs, I’m not starving to the point I’m raising the cupboards for treats because my body is full and satisfied.

snacks like boiled eggs, nuts and seeds, veggies sticks and hummus, fruit, peanut butter and banana on rice cakes are great things to fill the gaps between meals and just make sure breakfast is things like scrambled eggs, avocado, spinach, cottage cheese, porridge etc.

Honestly OP I think trying alone without support is a bad idea. If you don't do so well you will blame yourself and add to the cycle of low self esteem. Pls go to a support group or dietician or something. Also accept that if you slip up, even really badly and regain a lot of weight, that is OK and part of the process for most people. Many people don't try consistently to lose weight because of fear of failure but its not a fail/ win scenario. Any loss at all should be celebrated as a victory and it is likely to fluctuate a bit.

You are feeling addicted to something specifically designed to make you addicted. Remember that. It's not a coincidence that there is an obesity crisis increasing as access to processed foods increases. It's important to remember that. I heard somewhere that you should direct your anger towards the massively profitable companies that are playing on your vulnerability and not on yourself. Forgive yourself, it's the most important part of weight loss. I'm overweight and not losing much yet but I'm really working on the psychological side of it and starting to feel much happier in myself.

Beautifully said @Dontlletmedownbruce
@Bookridden Well done on dropping the 3lbs! Ok so you may have regained some or all of it, that isn't a failing or something to be ashamed of. The important part is that you did manage it and you can manage it again. The suggestion of GP and/or support group is a great idea! You sound like you'd do well with some peer support to keep you focused and encouraged. Please also consider some counselling for your self image as you're so mean to yourself which may not be helping. I think you've done incredibly well and I'm proud of you for giving it a go and recognising the difficulties in weight loss. Big hugs to you

OP 3 and a half stone is not that bad. Be kinder to yourself. I’ve lost 3 with slimming world. Target was another stone but I’m stopping at half a stone because I think I’m being too hard on myself. SW and walking did it for me

Have a look at Rebelfit on FB OP, it's run by an experienced PT who approaches fitness from a holistic angle and focuses on the reasons we overeat rather than just weight loss. It's gradually changing the way I think about food, fitness and myself and I've lost a stone so far, still 2.5 to go so I started from where you are. They do run programmes which you pay for but I've learnt quite a bit just from the public posts tbh, worth a look as a starting point at least.

I’ve been using the Yuka app to scan the barcodes of food and it’s been such an eye opener to the amount of crap that’s in our food.

So many foods are actually designed to push us to eat past the point of feeling full. Eating better quality food where you can will automatically mean you eat less.

Stress, and lack of sleep make us seek out quick carbs. Learning how our bodies evolved is helpful - there’s literally no such thing as willpower. The only way not to eat crap is not to bring it into your house, and not to be around it (which is easier said than done). But please don’t beat yourself up - if only because feeling bad leads to poorer food choices!

If you listen to podcasts, I’d suggest Feel Better Live More and the Mel Robbins Podcasts for health advice and positivity.