Have you relocated with your mid-primary age kids?

[Thatsajokeright]

How did they find it? We're considering relocating but the only thing that stops me is the idea of uprooting my DD who has just started Year 4.

I just can't seem to come to peace with either decision.

Stay here and I will be unhappy; not miserable but not happy either.

Move and disrupt the kids who may end up miserable. Then what?

My DD is a happy, friendly, extroverted kid who makes friends easily. DS is more introvert but in Year 2 so easier to move?

I'd be grateful for some thoughts on it.

I’m not having a go at you at all and it may be entirely irrelevant to your situation if say you’re only moving to the next town over or something but it just seems that whenever this is discussed on here so many people don’t actually factor in the effect it can have, while they’re making it sound all fine and dandy, be your happiest self, your kids will adjust stuff. Sometimes they don’t. Sometimes it leaves them feeling isolated, detached and rootless for the rest of their lives. That may sound a bit dramatic but it’s no less true.

My two changed primary schools twice. Once in the early years because we realised the school was awful. Then we relocated when they were in years 2 and 3.

Both went fine but the second move happened mid-year rather than at the start of a school year, and that went brilliantly. Teachers and the kind kids (and parents) went out of their way to fuss over the 'new kid' and make them welcome.

Whereas when they slipped into a new class at the beginning of the year everyone was a bit busy/preoccupied to notice, and they weren't given so much support to fit in.

Yes.
We moved countries when the oldest was Y2, and the youngest was 3 weeks into reception.
Landed a disastrous school, and moved them again after 6 weeks. They were very happy in that school for nearly 4 years.
Moved them back to UK for the last few weeks of Y3 and Y5 (having already finished those years) then they started Y4 and Y6 properly.
Oldest is an extrovert. Absolutely no issues at all.
Youngest is an introvert. Struggled with friendships at times, but is actually an OK kid who is decent at sport, so has always been "allowed" to play whatever game his brother and that friendship group were playing. Now at secondary, and got swooped up by a lovely existing group of lads and is firmly included.

We live in a popular commuter area. A lot of families move down with similarly aged children and they always seem to settle really well. Most say they moved at that point to be ready for the secondary transition, and certainly at DS's school, children seems to integrate quickly.

I’m a bit like @AngeloMysterioso in that I don’t really feel like I’m ‘from’ anywhere, having moved several times as a kid for my dad’s job. But my parents moved a lot when they were kids and so it’s sort of normal for us,though my cousins have stayed in the same area they grew up in. I do struggle to settle anywhere.

I don’t think it has affected me particularly negatively, but my brother struggled with starting secondary in a completely new town, leaving all his friends behind. He made friends at the new school but found school difficult as he’s quite shy, and he went a bit off the rails later. I don’t know if he’d ascribe it to the change of location but I think it was quite traumatic for him. We had some family difficulties in our late teens which didn’t help.

Some kids will adapt quickly; others won’t. Hard to say until you do it!