Lonely

[FancyRedMoose]

Well here goes….

Me and the husband have had yet another row and he has left the house. He will come back but I’m not sure I want him too. I’m tired. I think he has ADHD, he can’t sit still, can’t relax, always has to be doing something. He suggests one thing and within minutes he wants to do something else. (That’s why we fell out today, he suggested a walk, so I got everyone ready and on the way to our destination he says he forgot his own coat so I sighed, that sounds awful but it’s like this every day, it is as if I have an extra child) Starts a task but won’t finish it, leaves every cupboard door open, loses everything. Buys all sorts of crap that isn’t needed! We are a family of 5 yet I feel I’m the only one who is an adult in the house. He like’s a drink, only time he seems to chill. I’m fed up, im lonely. I can’t talk to him because he calls it nagging. Sometimes I feel I’m being unreasonable but I feel the wait of the children, the house, our finances, all appointments,
kids clubs, EVERYTHING etc is on my shoulders

i really have no one to talk too, am I being unreasonable??

I do love him but after 20 years it’s hard work!

Yanbu. It sounds like you need a break from each other.

How old are the DCs? Do you have helpful grandparents? Can you take the DCs family-visiting at half term without him? Start to plan it now, it helps to have something to look forward to.

Or can you send him on a golf weekend? A training course? Something that gives you space and gets him out from under your feet.

He will never change and in my experience of my experience having ADHD where he worsened with age the best thing I did was to ask him to leave. We have a severely disabled Adult Son and he lives with me. I feel peaceful now.

YANBU. It’s a terrible burden to bear.

You might get more replies if you post on relationships, though it’s hard with a ND partner, as most people on that thread won’t understand the real meaning and implications of this.