Ex and having dog put to sleep.

[Tumbleweed101]

I am really wound up tonight. Perhaps unreasonably.

In 2009 we got our dog. We had four children, youngest 6mths.

In 2011 my ex left us all. I was left with children and dog (he had been the one to push to get her). Over the years ex has been poor at paying maintenance for the children and wouldn’t help with dog food, vet bills etc.

Tomorrow we have the dog put down. She is 15 and her health is poor. It is time.

Am I unreasonable to be annoyed ex wants to be there. He goes months without seeing the children and lives over an hour away. He won’t pay towards any costs tomorrow. I’m not outwardly making a fuss for the children’s sake but inside it has really annoyed me he wants to be there now but hasn’t bothered for the last decade.

😭

Do the children want him there? Honestly they sound old enough to have it said to them: sorry, I understand why you told dad but given how little interest he shows in anything to do with either the dog or the family, I would find it very hard to have him there and as the person who has loved and looked after ddog all these years I'm going to put myself first in this.
So sorry OP. 💔

She’s beautiful OP.

I had this exact situation a decade ago, also a last outing to the beach. 😔. XH wanted to come to say goodbye to the dog. I told him to F off.

He walked out, hadn’t paid towards the kids let alone the dog. Hadn’t nursed her, cleaned up after her, struggled with lifting her in the car etc..

I simply didn’t want the abusive arsehole anywhere near my life.

Sorry if you feel you need to put up with him for the kids 💐.

Can you move the appointment time a few hours forward? Tell the kids on the day that the vet had to rearrange the time?
I would move heaven and earth to make sure he couldn't be there to be honest.

Not a chance, he walked away and contributed nothing to the dog. If he starts just say yes it will cost £xxx for your half of the vets bill. He won't come then! Dick

So, it has been done 😢

He did come and it wasn't actually so bad, I was cross and emotional yesterday. He didn't attempt to take over and he did support the girls through it well along side me. It hasn't really hit home though that I won't be seeing the dog again :( .

So sorry OP that your beautiful dog is gone. She was obviously veryloved x

In a word, no. Just that.

So sorry about your lovely dog, OP, and relieved he behaved like a decent person for a change.

Sending lots of love xxx

I dislike your ex. Sorry about your poor dog x

So sorry you have lost your beautiful girl

🥲 ❤️‍🩹

im pleased he didn't make it any worse than it was already though.

Ill be thinking of you tomorrow xx

She looks beautiful and serene. 🍁

aw how lovely to take her to the beach one last time x

What a lovely photo, I'm a cat person but in tears here may she RIP. She was obviously loved by you and you children xx

@Tumbleweed101 , I hope you’re ok. I still remember waking up the first day afterwards and being hit by the fact that my dog wasn’t here. Life seemed ok for the first five seconds and then it hit me like a ton of bricks.

About ten days later it started to feel less like my world had broken at that stage of my morning.

It just takes time 💐.

I'm so sorry OP. Your dog was beautiful. I'm glad he didn't make it worse for you.

Hope you and the kids are coping. Thinking of you xx

It hasn’t really hit home yet. My other dog looked a bit confused when I fed him last night as usually the older dog got given her dinner first and he hesitated waiting. I’ve picked up her bed and personal bits and it looks bare.

We’ve had her since my youngest was a baby so she’s been there right through their childhoods and is in all the big event photos such as Christmas - she loved opening presents (even found a couple of the children’s opened Xmas morning by her last year!).

When she was a little younger, before she got such bushy eyebrows!