A rant about how shit houses are

[TheGreatIndoors]

Hello

I don't think I'm looking for anything outrageous but every house I look at has one of these deal breakers:

• No toilet upstairs
• No toilet downstairs
• Not enough space for dishwasher AND washing machine in kitchen (Yes I am British!)
• Bedrooms you couldn't swing a cat in (am I the only person who wants to fit some fucking furniture in there as well as the bed itself?!)
• No parking

This goes for both new/old properties, ones in town and more suburban.

All I bloody want is 2+ big bedrooms (4x4m), living room, kitchen, garden and parking. Having a bungalow would solve the toilet issue but there aren't many round here.

And that's before we get onto things like:

• no space for a proper table to eat at
• garden has been concreted-over
• no window in the kitchen
• open plan kitchen door - I prefer to close the door on mess and smell
• Living room is just a box with no focal point apart from TV hanging on wall
• place is a massive do-er upper or has some hideous damp/roof issue

It doesn't even seem to be a question of budget. Even very expensive houses with way more bedrooms than I need have the same issues.

In many ways, my current flat is actually better. 2 large bedrooms, living room, kitchen (not open plan and has window). The trouble is I have only a shared garden, no parking and obviously stairs to climb.

Fed up.

I've got some of those in my 1950s semi:

Three toilets (although one is outside so not used regularly)
Shower room
Family bathroom
Ultility
Two double bedrooms and one smaller single (used as an office)
Two reception rooms
Driveway parking for three cars
Large garden

However we compromised on kitchen, it's a tiny galley, and our dinning table is currently in the consevatory. Long term plan is to extend back, open kitchen dinner, but it's serviceable for now.

I disagree with comments on 2 bed, having just moved and needed to compromise on just that. There are often 3 beds built with g/f bathrooms, converted to 2 beds.

My search was for a 1930’s 3 bed, so would have 2 decent doubles and a box room for office. Plus kitchen/diner (so knocked through or extended) and separate sitting room. Also most of things on ops list but preferably separate utility room or cupboard for w/m.

Exoensive area (difficult for families to jump to next level) many of those type houses had loft conversions so 4 bed and out of price range. Or over extended creating bathrooms without windows. And don’t get me started on the ‘driveways’ without dropped kerbs, that would now not get permission to add as not quite deep enough for council requirements.

As I was moving due to divorce, had EXH on my back. It seemed the only time I found anywhere that ticked all the boxes was when we were not proceed-able, or would lose out to first time buyers.

I settled for a largish (nearly 1000 sq foot) 2 bed Victorian cottage, with large enough garden to add home office if required. It’s the type with street door on side but no proper hallway, and steepish stairs. Kitchen is not huge but has d/w and is off large dining room, and leads to separate utility with g/f WC off - that’s the only extended bit - probably originally to make a bathroom. All have windows and kitchen has side door into garden. Not the bi-folds everyone currently craves, so meant less competition for the house!

Sitting room completely separate. 2 large doubles upstairs, back one leading into large bathroom (would have been a bedroom originally), front one has a small en-suite shower room added (no window).
No driveway, but secure parking at rear of garden via service road, which I am actually preferring.

Would never have even viewed the house at the start of my search, as have always lived in 1930’a built. Maybe there are similar in your area that have not been spoilt, that you can check out floor plan on?

I so agree with all you say OP. Especially the toilets up and down, and a garden. I've started looking recently and lots of older properties have their bathrooms off the kitchen?
Another feature I'd like is an enclosed front room but with an open plan kitchen diner across the back.

When I bought my house, it was a complete fixer upper, but it had potential
Over the years we have changed the layout downstairs so instead of a huge downstairs toilet we now have a separate downstairs loo/utility room.
Good sized bedrooms were already there so just redecorate/built in wardrobes, knocked the upstairs loo and tiny bathroom into one good sized bathroom.
Garden done up, garden office added for wfh
Front garden also converted to off-street parking.

We've spent about £50k but if we had bought a house with all that already it would have been an additional £100k on the house price.

Sometimes you have to find the closest to what you want with the ability to make changes to what you need

A major consideration is what is good for my cats. (My future contains a LOT of cats!)

• renovating a place would cause disruption to them

• it would be handy to have everything on one level so that the cats don't have to come up/down stairs when elderly, never mind me! (I recently nursed a cat through kidney disease and her eventual passing at age 18).

• Hard floors are better with elderly/ill cats. (Or indeed all cats, who tend to vomit up hairballs!!)

I think many 2 beds won't meet all those requirements. My old Victorian terrace had most but the kitchen was tiny and the downstairs loo was a lean to in the back yard. The back garden was quite big but front had on street parking only and always busy. I had a dining room, sitting room and very small kitchen downstairs (washing machine but no chance of a dishwasher) - and two large bedrooms upstairs but a smallish bathroom leading off one.

If you buy new the rooms will be small and often only one loo. Parking would be better.

You may have to look for a bigger property or manage your requirements? Are you on your own? If so do you really need a dishwasher? Agree if you are a gardener you would want a loo upstairs and down......

My current house has downstairs: understair storage, coat cupboard. Upstairs: airing cupboard with storage, two separate large cupboards. Toilet downstairs. I'm increasing my budget double the price of my current house but I still CANNOT get more space than what I currently have. It's ridiculous. Also the cameras they use piss me off, making a room look enormous when it's really a 2.5 x 2.5 living room / diner 😩
I'm almost giving up but desperate to move areas (same city, just a 2/3 miles away)

We had a 70's house in the 70's with no central heating and no insulation whatsoever. We also lived on the foothills of the Pennines. It was bloody freezing in winter. When I moved two years ago, the majority of houses for sale here were 70's houses but I kept looking for six months to get a more modern house (5 years old).

It has downstairs and upstairs toilets and an ensuite, a utility room, two decent sized bedrooms (one with large built in wardrobes), two smaller bedrooms (one with a double bed in), a good sized landscaped garden and a driveway for two cars. Oh and a garage I can fit my little car into and it still leaves room for storage and tools at the back.

The best bit though is that it is 25.4° in my bedroom this morning, and the heating has not come on yet this year. The loft and walls are insulated. I built up credit in my gas and electricity accounts and just got refunds of over £300 paid into my bank. Yesterday I never put a jumper or sweatshirt on at all, and I feel the cold as I have thyroid problems.

It's worth keeping looking until you find what you want.

I agree that the houses here are awful, but why would you want a washing machine in the kitchen? I haven't seen a single new build that doesn't have a utility room, wouldn't that be more ideal?

Bedrooms are definitely way too small here, I have no clue where people store anything. It's just the 2 of us and even in 4 bed houses the storage is shit, unless we just converted an entire room into storage.

Agreed. We are currently purchasing a property and told them to get rid of all the carpets. I don't understand how people who have pets or kids have carpets, it's so gross and unhygienic.

Why exactly is that? You know it rains pretty much year round here, right? I will never understand shower lines in the UK. I know it's more environmentally friendly to hang your washing but it sure as hell doesn't seem that feasible.

Thanks all for your comments.

I live in Scotland so there is zero change I could reliably get clothes/bedding/towels dried outside all year round!

And I've never lived (as an adult) in a house without a dishwasher so I'd be disinclined to start washing dishes now at age 41. I put pet bowls and things like hairbrushes in as well, can't imagine not having a dishwasher.

Yeah overall I'm pretty stunned at the number of houses I see online with no tumble dryer, no dishwasher and sometimes only a bath, no shower! For me that would be like going back to the 1980s!

Yeah a separate utility would be fine.

But I'm seeing houses with washing machines shoved in inaccessible cupboards or the bathroom. (Imagine pulling out your lovely clean laundry and immediately exposing it to poo fumes!)

I think it depends on the circumstances. It's just the 2 of us and some pets and the open plan kitchen/living/dining is great and gives a large entertaining space. Conversely I despise the many, separate boxy rooms you see in older houses. Also, the only houses I've seen with any storage seem to be new builds, the older houses have no space for it.

That being said, the identikit new builds that are thrown up in sprawling tree less developments are horrible and not at all what we would be looking for in a new build which seems to be the majority of the stock here. The only houses I have ever seen where I thought, that would be nice were one off, architect designed, modern new builds, it's very rare to find a nice looking and well thought out, modernized older home in the UK so you will always have to do that work yourself.

Oh, I totally agree with you. What people call luxuries here are common place in most countries in the world. As an American, I'm pretty shocked by the low standards of living in the UK which is why we opted to work with the developer and design our house ourselves, though it still already had a separate utility room with washer/dryer, dishwasher, American fridge freezer, garage, large bedrooms and lots of built in storage. It's just a matter of finding something and it's Def a numbers game, I would say one in 100 of the houses we have looked at has been remotely livable according to our standards.

@Childfreecatlady agree. It's to do with us living cheek-by-jowl here I think. Space is at such a premium. So instead of a utility room, people will shove in another "bedroom" ( 2.5 m2)

I had friends from Maine over last summer. I think they were quietly shocked that despite being in my 40s and having a good job, I'm living flats with about 100 others in the same space as the footprint of their property.