How would you feel if your colleague said this to you?

[Leazi]

My colleague noted that I’m kind and mellow, and our manager might not prioritise me for the projects I'm interested in because of this.

I’m unsure how to feel about being described as "mellow"...Does this carry a negative connotation in a work environment?

Mellow means calm and not shouty to me, an even keel. However, this shouldn’t stop you getting certain jobs.

What a helpful colleague.

I think your colleague is politely telling you that you are perceived as someone who lacks the "killer instinct".

Kind and mellow are both compliments. You could read that as you are an approachable, calm and understanding person - someone who is a safe pair of hands in the workplace.

My interpretation of mellow here is that whilst you have experience you don't make a big thing of shouting about it. You take a pragmatic approach and are a "seen it, done it, no need to panic" kind of person. You are relaxed about things.

However (depending on the nature of your work) this might be seen as you being complacent or not "hungry" for change etc. Do you want to work on lead new/challenging/high profile projects? If you do, your colleague is telling you that you need to raise your profile and show your manager you are keen to try new things.

If you are happy as you (and there is nothing wrong with that), smile and take the compliment as it sounds like you are a well regarded member of the team.

Laid back don't make a fuss - so last in line for anything exciting or interesting if the manager wants an easy life

Your colleague is trying to demean you and make you feel unworthy. One to keep an eye on, I suspect, however chilled out you are...

I’d read that as nice and laid back but maybe too chilled for a big or important project. If you’re happy where you are that’s ok, if you’re hunkering for promotion it’s not great and you need to change how you’re perceived.

Thank you, everyone. I appreciate your posts, advice, and interpretation of the comments.
I mentioned to her that I had already emailed the manager last week and felt hesitant to follow up again, as I didn't want to seem 'forceful'. She advised that frequent emails might be necessary to achieve what I want, given the manager's personality.

you shouldn't need to explain your actions to this colleague, they aren't the boss of you.

Do what you need to do, in the style you choose for yourself and think less about what other people's opinions are.

find ways to put yourself forward in a socially intelligent way "I've picked up that there's a new project starting in a couple of weeks. I've got xyz skills that are really needed, please can I get involved and contribute". I'm sure your manager will prefer a solution worded like that than the bossiness and overbearing approach of the colleague,

Ridiculous

I’d take this from it as well. Being too hesitant to follow up with a colleague or manager on something you need in order to complete your tasks comes across as unassertive and likely to avoid having the often necessary difficult conversations that sometimes need to be had, because you don’t like feeling uncomfortable. Both of which you can have coaching for, if you feel you’re held back.

Thank you. I think you're right. I don't want to come across as forceful. I always feel like expressing my interest/asking once should be enough, and I’d feel uneasy bringing it up again. I’ve only been with the company for 2 years, so this is something I’ll need to work on if I want to progress.

Utter nonsense.

You’re either paranoid, or a shit-stirrer.

Thank you for this.
I feel foolish for doubting myself, but I followed her advice and emailed my manager a second time. He hasn't responded yet, and he usually replies right away.😣