If someone is described as having a "strong personality"

[UnhappyAndYouKnowIt]

What does that mean to you?

I would usually take it as a polite way of saying someone is domineering or a bully. But I'm second guessing myself and wondering if that's too harsh.

For goodness sake, more man bashing!!

I have never heard it used by a male. Men are usually far more direct and don't piss about with covert descriptors, they'll usually say "loud" or whatever.

I assume it to be a polite way of saying "loud, brash, opinionated"

Forceful and can dominate if not held in check. You may want to prepare a few standard responses to keep him / her on track and not let him/ her derail the team with opinions. Perhaps something like 'A good point, now let's hear from someone else' type stuff. Strong personalities can be very good but also have the potential to change the dynamic of a team if the leader gives them too much airspace. They can be good for defending the position when you need them to if they're on message

I agree with your first three statements, but I don’t think it’s always necessarily pejorative. I think during one of the frequent threads on having no friends on here, where the discussion was about why you could be ‘nice’ and still friendless, I said niceness wasn’t my chief consideration when making new friends. Then someone asked me what kind of people I looked for, and I think I said that if you lined up all my friends in a row, probably all they had in common. was strong personalities.

I think if I was hearing this from a misogynistic type man about a woman I'd be inclined to give the benefit of the doubt. To be fair I have also heard it as a euphemism for someone who is very rude and obnoxious so it could be either.

Both myself and my colleague have been described by many as having 'strong personalities'
In our cases it just means being the only two people in the department prepared to take on the shittest jobs and get them done. It's ruffled a few feathers over the years but funnily enough we are both reasonably popular with many 'work friends' Both male and female.
I don't think it's necessarily always a bad thing but I am blessed with a thick skin so wouldn't be too upset if someone did mean it in a derogatory way 🤷‍♀️

@SirChenjins has it!

I disagree that it would never be used to describe a man - I've recently heard it used to describe a man - one who is obnoxious and likes to be 'controversial'.

But I agree it's also often used to describe a woman who speaks up.

It's also used to describe children who don't listen/play up a lot.

In general I'd say it's used to describe someone who 'takes up more space' than the the speaker thinks they should - whether that point is reached when someone is a domineering bully or simply a woman who dares to disagree with a man, will depend on the speaker.

It's not describing her as "strong" though, it's more as in a "strong coffee" for example. You're describing the personality, strong being the degree of intensity. I don't think the idea of a "strong" woman (eg one who has been through a lot and got back up again ) Is akin to describing a "strong" personality, if that makes sense.

Depends if it's a man or a woman.
If a man it generally means assertive and confident.
If a woman it generally means bossy, pushy and bullying.
🤬

One of those descriptors practically never used for men.

I don’t see it as a bad thing - I’d take a strong personality to mean somebody who has something about themselves, doesn’t suffer fools and is a straight talker. I tend to like this type of person. I’d interpret ‘they are a bit of a personality’ to mean something else, but strong wouldn’t bother me.

I'm surprised at all the comments saying it's only something used to describe women.

I know of plenty of men who've been referred to as having "strong personalities".

The man bashing on here is 😮

Men don't use covert descriptors in general. It's usually women in fairness!

Plus I do think it's a polite way of describing a type of person that's loud and domineering, and actually those personalities can really change the dynamic of an office.

I've certainly heard men being described as far less polite insults by women, real life work based examples: "they're a prick" "they're a dickhead/knobhead/bellend" "tosser" "jumped up little twat".

Women on here really enjoy victimhood when it comes to men, sometimes they're baseless and hypocritical

See also "doesn't suffer fools gladly".

The definition of "man bashing" on Mumsnet is incredibly wide.....

That they're an arsehole people find it hard to tolerate, either deliberately (a bully, a misery etc) or unintentionally (no self-awareness, poor emotional intelligence, poor grasp of social conventions and etiquette).

The nicest way it could be intended is that they're loud and don't have a filter, but are well intentioned. But even then, it's not a compliment, it's more of a "if you overlook this negative thing, they're a good person". I work with a woman like that and really like her, she's just hard to spend a lot of time with.

It can also just be a sexist dog whistle used about women who are assertive and well-informed about things.

Just because you haven't heard it being used by a man doesn't mean it's never happened.

Also, I wouldn't say it's man bashing, just shared experience of misogyny.

The thread started with what does the phrase mean to you?

If you have been fortunate enough to not have seen, heard or experienced it being used in a derogatory way, by men (Or women). Then that is great. Equally, if you have heard it used as a compliment then also great.

Unfortunately it doesn't mean that is the only way it is used. It is not man bashing to share experiences and perspectives. And it may be more prevalent in some industries or workplace cultures than others. It is routinely used in the world I work in to describe women who stick their neck out... not necessarily the loudest, in your face women. Just women who ask why, how and what.

Language is language and the OP asked for opinions and experiences.

It’s used to describe me. Other much more flattering terms get used to but it’s usually used to mean I said no without being apologetic or asked for more pay, hours or perks. That I moved the meeting along or challenged ‘banter’ or racism, sexism or poor behaviour generally rather than excusing it. The people who tend not to use the term are the ones who used to be the targets of the banter or worse work conditions.

Positive if you're a man, negative if you're a woman......

This is what I thought too. People who are generally more extroverted than introverted are described as “strong personalities”, or at least that’s what I would take it to mean.

Someone who speaks up and is sure about themselves. Someone confident with clear likes and dislikes.

Definitely not something you want to hear at parents evening

I’ve seen it used in a context where direct language isn’t appropriate, so for annoying, loud and pushy kids, gammony male work associates, and at faux polite family gatherings about opinionated relatives. I’ve not seen it directed as a gendered insult at women, but I accept other posters’ experiences. “Bossy” is the gendered insult which is equivalent and used unfairly toward women.

Sex-based insult