Bits in songs that make you cringe

[HolidayAtNight]

Inspired by the thread the other day about "More Than Words" by Extreme. Like many posters, I hadn't heard the song in years, so went to listen to it. It was all going well until the bit when he sings "Hold me close don't EVAH LET ME GO" and I had to turn it off immediately.

What bits of songs do you find jarring and/or embarrassing? I have so many, but will try to choose a few. Lines where they've had to awkwardly shift the words around or use old-fashioned vocab/syntax to make them fit are definitely among the worst offenders.

In "Upside Down" by Diana Ross: "Respectfully I say to thee..." Whyyyy

In "A Spaceman Came Travelling" - the bit where he sings about a baby's cry and then the guitar imitates a newborn crying. This might be the worst one.

In "Come On Eileen" - "You in that dress, my thoughts, I confess, verge on dirty" Just no. The awkward old-fashioned phrasing, and the way his voice goes when he sings "dirty". Unbearable.

Oh god. Yes, Rod Stewart’s Tonight’s the Night.

Come on angel my hearts on fire
Don't deny your man's desire
You'd be a fool to stop this tide
Spread your wings and let me come inside.

Don't say a word my virgin child
Just let your inhibitions run wild
The secret is about to unfold
Upstairs before the night's too old

No. Just no. How on earth did this one EVER get past the censor?

Same here - I wouldn't normally condone it, but it very much sounded like he deserved to be brought down a peg or two somehow!

I think this about I drove all night. He literally says “I crept in your room” like what!! No it’s not alright mate

Mars ain't the kind of place to raise your kids
In fact it's cold as hell
And there's no-one there to raise them if you did

Surely you'd be there to raise them in this hypothetical scenario in which you try to raise your kids on Mars?

The whole of 'I feel it coming' by The Weeknd is excruciating to me. It makes me feel slightly queasy.

My kids were doing Grease at primary school so I thought I’d play the video with subtitles on to help them learn the songs-cue much embarrassment when the 10 year old asked what a Pussy Wagon was!

Not so much lyrics but it makes me cringe hearing Chris Martin sing he’s never been in love like this before in the latest Coldplay sing-he’s over 50 FGS.

Stevie Wonder is a legend except for the moment in time when he recorded I Just Called To Say I Love You
pile of poop.

This bit in Natasha Bedingfield's 'These Words' makes me cringe myself inside out:

Read some Byron, Shelley and Keats
Recited it over a Hip-Hop beat

The Beautiful South have the same effect on me - people have already mentioned 'Perfect Ten', but I have a special hatred for 'Rotterdam':

This could be Rotterdam or anywhere
Liverpool or Rome
'Cause Rotterdam is anywhere
Anywhere alone

I honestly don't know why!

I can't listen to 'Angels' or 'Flying Without Wings' either, just so glurgy.

Roy Orbison’s is a cover version. It’s a Cyndi Lauper song.

And the operator said 40 cents more for the next three minutes

From Sylvia's Mother. Doesn't scan, ugh.

He takes another home again.... whoever wrote that was a lyrical genius.

Rod Stewart’s ‘Tonight’s the Night’

’Come on angel my hearts on fire
Don't deny your man's desire
You'd be a fool to stop this tide
Spread your wings and let me come inside, 'cause
Tonight's the night
It's gonna be alright
'Cause I love you girl
Ain't nobody gonna stop us now

Don't say a word my virgin child
Just let your inhibitions run wild
The secret is about to unfold
Upstairs before the night's too old’

🤢🤬

I find Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da annoying - I seem to recall reading that the title is a phrase in a foreign language (maybe just meaning 'life goes on' or 'that's life' or similar), so fair enough; but all the other random noises and interjections are irritating.

It was also another one that surprisingly seemed to escape the censors of the time, with its matter-of-fact inclusion of a transwoman (or at least part-time female impersonator) even way back then.

Cheap thrills by sia annoys me - go out and sponge off men 🙄🤣

This is exactly what popped into my head when I read the OP :/

Cher's cover of Walking In Memphis. Marc Cohn was walking in Memphis but Cher seems to have taken a wrong turn off Route 66 or whatever and is walking in Memphus. Drives me mad.

I think “Desmond stays at home and does his pretty face” was actually a mistake - but Macca liked it and kept it in!

I’ve been angry at Shape at You continually since it came out. Sometimes I can get through the day without thinking about it, but it’s rare. “We push and pull like a magnet do”, “and now my bedsheets smell like you” TOO MUCH INFORMATION ED. Also if someone said they were “in love…with the shape of you” to me I’d tell them to fuck off. It’s so deeply unromantic and unsexy and it would make me feel like a piece of meat.

Omi- Cheerleader is the other one. When she asks him if he ever thinks about cheating and he say “no not really”. Not really?

But I’m fine with nuclear wars not being easy and cancer being serious, because those are accurate statements I suppose.

It’s well observed

All the ones that infantalise adult women, eg, What's New Pcat(Tom Jones.) It was on the radio a lot when when I was very small and I loved it till I realised Tom wasn't singing to an actual pcat. It was a disappointment and I don't think I was much older when I decided it was a revolting way to talk to a grown woman and not at all romantic.

While we're on the subject of Tom Jones:

Delilah
The Green Green Grass of Home - both for obvious reasons.

and She's A Lady

'Well, she's all you'd ever want
She's the kind I like to flaunt and take to dinner
But she always knows her place
She's got style, she's got grace, she's a winner.'

🤢

Also and more for aesthetic reasons, Driving Home For Christmas. This egregious pile of slop would have been bad enough from someone lesser, but from Chris Rea? The man who gave us Road to Hell and Windy Town? Unforgivable.

Eugh that awful song by Meghan Traynor all about the bass. The line stick thin barbie doll enrages me even now!

Is that not the point though?

This! Apparently it even makes Simon Le Bon cringe nowadays 😂

You haven’t lived till your heard top katz!!!

you krazy kats is a banger 🤣🤣🤣🤣

pj & Duncan was the first concert I ever went too

There’s a song called You Can Have Him, Jolene.

It is basically saying he turned out to be a lazy, lying cheat and the singer has found a better man.