Damaged the car, feeling dreadful

[bakewellbride]

I was driving my child to toddler group and took a wrong turning. It was a nightmare trying to turn around and I very stupidly bashed the car into a post and broke the brake light. There is also damage to the bumper.

I'm a total mess and have cried so many times. Waiting to hear back from the garage to find out how much it will be.

I just feel terrible and so embarrassed and stupid. To make matters worse I'm new to driving (passed 8 years ago but had driving anxiety so never drove much) and this has shattered my confidence.

It happens OP don’t beat yourself up about it and def don’t let it put you off driving! Back behind the wheel ASAP!

This! Driving is a life skill. This sort of thing will happen to everyone at some point - at least nobody was hurt. It’s just superficial damage and money, nothing important.

Thanks both. Worst case scenario he said it could be £1000 for new brake light and bumper. I feel sick at the price, so anxious waiting for the call.

You poor thing. It happens and at least nobody was hurt. That's what insurance is for (although I know excess and future premium hikes = PITA). If it'll cripple you to fork out then make a claim - or if you can borrow the money at 0% interest somehow, maybe that would be an option? Don't beat yourself up. X

It's a metal box that gets you from A to B. No one has died, you and your DC are safe and the world isn't going to end. That's what DH told me the first time (there have been others!!) that I dinged the metal box and phoned him in tears.

It's really not a big deal. Yes it'll be costly but that's what insurance is for.

Just let it go and go about your day.

Still remember having a low wall leap out in front of me and scrape down the side of the car as I pulled out of Blockbusters (that tells you how long ago it was!). I went straight to the garage and asked them to please tell me how much it would be before I went home and told my husband.... I still swear the wall moved! But seriously, it happens to all of us at some point.

Most people have had something like this happen when new to driving, it’s not at all uncommon! I understand it feels like utter crap though, not to mention the cost. But don’t beat yourself up over it 💐

It’s some superficial damage to a metal box. Everyone is fine. It’s an easy mistake that happens to most people at some point over a lifetime of driving. I’ve scraped 2 cars in a car park- once when I was 17, again when I was 29. Just pleased it wasn’t anything worse! DH did the same as you (wrong turn, turning around, backed into post) in a hire car once in a rush to get to the airport that was brand new and a free upgrade 🙈 thankfully he’d paid for their extra insurance! Don’t beat yourself up about it.

Thank you so much everyone. Still awaiting the dreaded call from the garage!

It’s a right of passage op. Don’t beat yourself up, it’s just a car. No one was hurt, only your pride.

If it helps you feel better, a professional driver that I know reversed into a post with a VIP in the back of the car not once but twice (same VIP, two separate occasions).

Get more than one quote and don't beat yourself up. The light you will have to get sorted but the bumper may be optional.

Oh we’ve all done it OP. I bet if you started a post asking ‘tell if you’ve ever bumped your car and if so what into’ you’d get the vast majority telling you what they’d once hit. You feel really stupid at the time and then realise it’s actually not that big a deal. Just look at how many cars have minor scrapes and bumps on them.

In my case: a large and obvious gate post. In my DH case: a tree and a small wall / high kerb.

It’s only a car. Brake lights shouldn’t be too expensive and if the bumper isn’t a safety issue perhaps just drive with it bumped. You can fix it before you sell it if that’s the plan. Do get more than one quote.

Definitely get more than one quote

The garage might quote you for branded parts

You don't need to pay for those....get generic parts

It'll cost a few hundred, I'd guess

And dont stress, we've all been there

I did similar on the weekend with my 3 year old in the car. Massive dent in the driver side door. I was so upset as we'd been having a nice day and I felt like I'd spoiled it for myself in under 10 seconds!

But honestly, it's just a lump of metal and you and DC are absolutely fine, most people have the odd incident like this and we just have to learn from them.

Have a nice glass of wine tonight and try not to stress 🍷

I doubt there’s any driver with a few years driving behind them who hasn’t had an accident of some sort. Hope the bill isn’t too monstrous.

This.

Be kind to yourself @op

Many years ago I pivoted our car around a gatepost at the holiday cottage we were staying in, my 1 year old DS was in the back. Although I was mortified, in the grand scheme of things nothing terrible had happened, no one was injured. Although DH does like to remind me of it now and then (in return I remind him he’s managed to clip the back of buses twice when driving.

I know it feels terrible now but it will become one of those things you look back on and maybe even laugh about. No one’s hurt and that’s the main thing.

It happens . I backed a 2 day old car into a bollard in a very tight car park some years ago , not much damage but there was a small dent , and I’m a very confident driver . Nobody is injured , cars can be fixed 💐

You poor thing OP

It's the worse feeling in the world but it happens to all of us

Yes I also did the same in a car park in a new car. I panicked

These things do happen, OP. To everyone, no matter how long they’ve been driving. When I started driving, I bashed someone else’s wing mirror on a narrow street 😱
I know it’ll take paying for but it’s just a hunk of metal and glass and moving parts. These things keep garages in customers!

I'm very glad of this thread as I've bashed the side of my car recently on my own drive - just turned the wheel too soon, distracted by something, I don't know how I did it. I was so angry with myself until I decided that if I was going to have a stupid mis-judgement when I'm driving then at least it was right outside my house and not on the motorway at 60 mph. It's taken me 6 weeks I'd say but I'm feeling okay about it now. Forgive yourself and just be grateful it's no worse.

I love mumsnet sometimes, thank you to everyone who has left a kind comment. Hopefully I'll feel better soon I just feel so guilty and stupid right now but slightly better than earlier today and I've stopped crying.

The garage still haven't called, should I chase them tomorrow? Just really anxious to have it fixed asap.

I have done that same thing twice and I have backed in to cars too, with people in them twice. Scraped the side tiki on a wall and in the garage. Never had an accident in decades, just small bumps at low speed.You feel bad and embarrassed especially if people see it.

Honestly , it happens to nearly everyone . I've been driving for 35 years , drive blue light runs , and commute 100 miles each way , so you'd think I'd have enough practice , yet I completely forgot about the bollard I'd parked behind , and clouted imy car getting out of a parking space . Really hard , in front of the entire market square .

Have also had to have a police car lifted off a low wall by some very nice builders after I managed to reverse over it , trying to get somewhere quickly .. it happens , and we learn from it . It's what insurance is for .